How To Deliver AIG's Golden Poo Trophy?
Here are three beauty shots of the "Lucky Golden Poo" trophy we shall bestow upon AIG, glorious 2009 victors in our Worst Company In America contest. Ain't she purty? The big question now is... how should we deliver it? Plop your suggestions in the comments.
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Comments:
Mail it to them....but make sure you get delivery confirmation, so we know they got it!
Wrap it in fire retardant material, then in a brown bag, then set it aflame by the front door.
Do whatever, just make sure it makes it into one of their filthy hands!!!
Find the executive contact info and have the package sent to them.
Must be addressed something along the lines "To be opened by addressee only"
Throw it through their window, run like hell. If anyone questions you, act innocent.
Throw it through the front window?
@nrich239: The issue with that is that AIG of late is the recipient of much public scorn - including death threats. They are most certainly going to be very wary of strange packages from unknown senders, especially ones mailed to any of the big wigs saying only that person should open it.
Could very well never be opened due to the fear of being a bomb.
Put in a box and mark it "Executive Bonus Payout" and see what happens.
What would the look on the x-ray tech's face be when they see a pile of poo show up as metal on the screen??
I'm not sure giving this to them would be a slap in the face to them like you're intending because said golden poo is actually a good luck charm.
They'll probably sell it and then give someone a bonus with the pay-out.
I'm thinking shareholder's meeting photo opportunities!
Throw it through the front windows of their corporate offices?
The US Government now owns a big piece of AIG, so as a taxpayer you own some of it. Pop up a video on youtube of you accepting the award on behalf of all the other owners of AIG.
@Jessica Haas: Wow is that where this trophy comes from? It looks identical to the one at that site.
Fools. A dozen comments and not a single mention of the greatest invention ever...
The Poo Catapult.
Throw it at the CEO's head as hard as you can and then run like hell.
Ah so this is where all the "tip jar" money is going.
Deliver it in a huge box with the word "Bailout" stamped prominently across the front of the box.
Send it via USPS and make sure it is insured !
I'm not specifically promoting violence, but here's my suggestion
"Generally speaking, mass drivers are only practical for small objects at a few kilometers per second; for example 1 kg at 2.5km/s. Heavier objects go proportionally more slowly; and lighter objects may be projected at 20km/s or more."
Do This:
1. Put it in a clear plastic case so that the receiver knows what it is as soon as he sees it coming.
2. Go to AIG's corporate office and tell the receptionist that you have a delivery for Mr. (Name of CEO).
3. Ta-da!
@lpranal: a more subtle approach would be to plate it in 24k gold, tell them that it is solid, weight it with lead so that it's the exact weight of real gold, and watch as they spend hours trying to figure out how to cash it in without the media noticing, only to eventually get it back from cash4gold.com weeks later. Zing!
Hire a someone who has gotten their home foreclosed and have them walk it over there with a red wagon.
Take out a seven digit mortgage on it, insure the mortgage through AIG, then default.
I have that Canon!
Distract the receptionist and have some helpers quickly carry it, a placard and a display case into the lobby.
See how long it is before it gets removed.
glue tax dollars to it and they'll come pick it up for you
My only concern is that someone at AIG might snag this and try to sell it on eBay for profit.
On a side note ....
I'm going to the Cayman Islands in a few weeks and I thought it might be interesting to send a post-card from the town of HELL with the names of every executive and CEO at AIG on it. *SNAP!*
High dollar awards ceremony with all expenses paid. gourmet food, hookers, booze. They will come.
*waves to the person reflected in the golden poo*
As for how to actually deliver it might I suggest a 'stealth' delivery?
Hold a press conference where you invite the CEO if AIG. Should get some free publicity for you guys.
I suppose this is like taking the Ring of Power to Mount Doom..
Via catapult!
Looks like a new flavor of soft serve ice cream. Not ominous enough. I can send you some good examples from my back yard if you want to improve the looks of this award. As far as awarding it, have an actual awards ceremony and invite the press. Hold it at some fast food joint and wear a tux.
@Mknzybsofh: The photographer shoudl have taken the picture naked. Hey, maybe instead of delivering the Golden Poo®, you deliver a picture of the Golden Poo® where the reflection of the naked photographer is clearly visible.
violently upside the CEO head.
Where does one purchase golden poo? I'm interested in getting one for a gag gift...
I have a pretty good idea of how to deliver a brown poo to AIG.
You know, through the powers of LinkedIn, I imagine there has to be someone that knows someone at AIG that could be convinced this is some inverse PR move wherein it could be presented in person...
You know, the ol' we-accept-this-in-hopes-of-not-making-the-list-next-year...
@Vanilla5
Thinking the same thing!
Doesn't matter how - just have a film crew there.