don't, that's my advice, nothing good comes from it!

The Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics has announced the discovery of a mass of crystallized carbon formerly known as star BPM 37093, now known as the biggest diamond in the galaxy, fifty light years away from Earth in the constellation Centaurus. The diamond is estimated to be 2,500 miles across and weighs approximately 10 billion-trillion-trillion-carats - a one, followed by 34 zeros. Travis Metcalfe, an astronomer from the Harvard-Smithsonian Center for Astrophysics and leader of the team who discovered the gem, says "You would need a jeweler's loupe the size of the sun to grade this diamond. Bill Gates and Donald Trump together couldn't begin to afford it."

Tip #1: Don't buy diamonds. They're just a symbol of your adherence to vapid, superficial social norms. It's stupid.

Hire a gemologist, which is what Mr. Sam did, who can give you good education and most importantly obtain wholesale gems and a fraction of the price of retail.

@noone1569: That's what my granfather keeps telling me...

I always cringe when my wife wants diamonds because I know how ridiculously overpriced they are. I could spend less money and get her something more meaningful, but sometimes she insists on the bling.

Is there a male equivalent of diamonds?

You know, a woman wanting a fancy diamond ring is equal to a guy who wants.....what?

Propose, then go with your fiance to diamond shop. That way you know she likes her setting and all that. Go to an independent store rather than a mall store. My independent jewler knocked $800 off my stone right away. Cut is the most important of the 4Cs. A well cut stone will sparkle like crazy and even look bigger. Mine catches the sunlight when i'm drivng and throws little rainbows all over the place because it's cut so well. Finally, insure it. To ensure my ring it's $40 a year on our home owners insurance. Well worth it.

Okay, I'll repeat:

No "don't buy diamonds!" suggestions, please, unless you have a serious alternative.

I'm just waiting for cultured diamonds to exceed the 2 carat mark so I can get a nice 1.5-2c marquis cut for the future Ex-Mrs. SteveDave.

@noone1569: You are a grade A idiot. Learn how to read.

@Connie Lee: Please read the article all the way through before commenting, so you don't miss lines like:

So now we ask the readers: what's your advice for buying diamond jewelry? No "don't buy diamonds!" suggestions, please, unless you have a serious alternative.

My experience with bluenile.com was excellent. Compared to the B&M jewelry stores I visited, I got to customize instead of picking from what was on the floor, I had no pushy salespeople and I saved about 30%. My wife was thrilled with the end result, too, and the quality has been perfect so far. I would recommend them any day.

Also, all the people saying "don't buy diamonds," why are you in a thread about advice on buying diamonds? If you asked for advice on buying Birkenstocks, tie-dye shirts and protest gear I wouldn't pretend to have any meaningful input on that subject. Get off your high horses.

The whole diamond thing is a scam cooked up by Debeers to make money.

@dragonfire81: it rhymes with slow robs :)j/k

@Blueskylaw: So your advice is that he should build a spaceship and go take a chip?

@dragonfire81: a very expensive watch??

Pawn shops (especially here in the South) have a great selection of diamond rings for cheap. I'm wearing a channel set band right now with 9 round .125 carat diamonds in it that we bought last Christmas for $150. The ring appraised for insurance at almost $1000. You might find a decent-sized stone or set of stones at a pawn shop in a ring you can swap out.

@Chris Walters: I have an alternative. If she is OK with it, buy her birthstone, but in a really beautiful setting. With the cost of the stone being lower, you can spend a little more on a gorgeous ring with intricate design and quality.

This won't work for me, my birthstone is a diamond. ;-)

However, my husband bought my a gorgeous "antique looking" ring he had designed in a style I like, with our son's birthstone - Alexandrite. He spent more on the natural Alexandrite than the synthetic one. It's gorgeous, a bigger carat than a diamond we could have afforded, and I get compliments on it all the time because of the unusual purple-green stone color. And it means a lot to me being our son's birthstone. It was a great anniversary gift.

I used pricescope.com when I started researching diamonds. I bought my fiance's engagement ring from JamesAllen.com. They were very helpful when I made the purchase and the founder actually on the phone helping me. They local dealer didn't have the diamond I wanted so I found one myself and for a better price Users in the forum are also very helpful and will help you find what you want.

I was into researching diamonds for a while and learned a lot about how to buy them and what to look for. What I became really interested in was the concept of "blood diamonds," or diamonds whose mining and selling has contributed in some way to the political upheaval in the areas from which they are mined, usually in Africa. Often the mining and selling of diamonds in those areas leads to a lot of bloodshed (If you've seen the movie Blood Diamond with DiCaprio, you know what I mean.) Diamonds that do not qualify as blood diamonds need a Kimberly Certification.

If you're interested in buying a diamond that is guaranteed not to be a blood diamond (these are called "conflict-free diamonds"), there are some websites you can shop from:

Check out http://www.conflictfreediamonds.org/ for information about conflict-free diamonds

http://www.brilliantearth.com/ - Brilliant Earth has all conflict-free diamonds (they are mined in Canada rather than Africa) and they also have a really great search engine that lets you customize with ease.

If all else fails, just wikipedia "conflict-free diamonds" to get more info.

On top of all else, for me it's really important to know that my diamond isn't participating in some way in the poor quality of life for someone else. Check 'em out!

@Connie Lee: So what other gem should he get his bride-to-be? Because most other gem stones are not good to wear every day for the rest of your life because they are not as strong as diamonds. I have several frieds that didn't want a diamond, but ended up getting one because they wanted their ring to last a lifetime.

There may be some alternative traditions that you can co-opt in order to save money. Do some research, and you can probably find some very romantic ways to communicate love that don't require buying diamonds.

That said, my experience with buying jewelry is that a little bit goes a long way. Just because I can afford a large stone doesn't mean it will look good on whomever is wearing it.

Also, it's bad to go buy on credit just because the financing is 0% or something of the like. Jewelry is one of those non-necessities, and should always be bought with cash or not bought if you can't afford it. Do not borrow to buy an engagement ring! If you can't afford an engagement ring you sure as heck can't afford a wedding.

Buy diamonds, but only cheap man made ones. Natural diamonds are only priced so high due to the artificial scarcity the diamond cartels manufacture to maintain those high prices. Lab made diamonds can be made to be just as good if not better than anything you can find in nature, but are dramatically less expensive. They are the same thing, all a diamond is is crystalline carbon!

I bought an engagement ring from Brilliant Earth, they sell conflict free diamonds and have a nice little selection tool on their website where you can sort diamonds by quality, color, size, price, etc.

The ring showed up quickly and it's really nice, so I'd recommend giving them a look.

@Connie Lee: That's pretty rude of you to say so; there are many reasons other than "wanting to fit in" that someone would want a diamond ring.

Diamonds are rare and (to many people) quite beautiful; both I and my fiancée admire her ring on a daily basis. For us, it has nothing to do with the "bling" and a lot more to do with the beauty, and also the commitment and trust between us.

That being said, diamonds are very expensive. If it's an option, you might consider looking for a stone that someone in your family is willing to pass on to you. You can have it re-set in a setting that the recipient can pick themselves, and it might be a lot more meaningful to everyone that way.

Moissanite looks like diamonds but is less expensive. Also, vintage jewelry can be less expensive (and more unique)

Try to find a local jeweler that provides independent certification so that you know exactly the carat and color of your diamond, then you can do a quick internet search to see the price of comparable diamonds. Most mall chains and other ilk sell their diamonds as falling into a certain range of color and carat grades. The fine print states that the carat and color may be off by 5- 10%. This allows them to sell cheaper diamonds at a higher price. There is a chain in Texas "Americus Diamonds" who i have bought from many times, they provide excelent customer service and great prices

@dragonfire81: Bacon?

Diamonds are lame.

@Ninjanice: good point. My wedding set is 65 years old and still going strong

@dragonfire81: A sports car?

(I apologize but this will be a double-post - I accidentally posted it as anonymous the first time so that will be popping up soon.)
_____

I was into researching diamonds for a while and learned a lot about how to buy them and what to look for. What I became really interested in was the concept of "blood diamonds," or diamonds whose mining and selling has contributed in some way to the political upheaval in the areas from which they are mined, usually in Africa. Often the mining and selling of diamonds in those areas leads to a lot of bloodshed (If you've seen the movie Blood Diamond with DiCaprio, you know what I mean.) Diamonds that do not qualify as blood diamonds need a Kimberly Certification.

If you're interested in buying a diamond that is guaranteed not to be a blood diamond (these are called "conflict-free diamonds"), there are some websites you can shop from:

Check out [www.conflictfreediamonds.org] for information about conflict-free diamonds

[www.brilliantearth.com] - Brilliant Earth has all conflict-free diamonds (they are mined in Canada rather than Africa) and they also have a really great search engine that lets you customize with ease.

If all else fails, just wikipedia "conflict-free diamonds" to get more info.

On top of all else, for me it's really important to know that my diamond isn't participating in some way in the poor quality of life for someone else. Check 'em out!

@pjorg: Diamonds are actually NOT rare. Emeralds and others are much more rare.

@Chris Walters: Any other gem that isn't a lame diamond? :P Sorry, I don't like diamonds. They are unoriginal and tacky. But I'm not a jewelery kinda gal anyway.

@dragonfire81: The only thing a man wants that trumps the sillines of womanly wants, is another woman...So if you're married, the male equivalent to diamonds is a girlfriend.

@ojzitro: * Silliness

@Blueskylaw: If they made a reality show about that extravagance then I would totally watch it and get entangled.

But without the show then it's impossible for me to care.

www.dirtcheapdiamonds.com

I would suggest taking her with you. The reason for that is you know what she is going to want. My wife and I went shopping, and since she was there, she not only helped me pay for the ring, she was able to get a larger one than if I just did it myself.

@dragonfire81: Titanium.

I'm about to get engaged, but neither my girlfriend nor myself are interested in buying socially-irresponsible DeBeers blood diamonds. I really like the idea of man-made diamonds and have heard they're getting to be really good quality (prompting DeBeers to laser-inscribe their diamonds so that you know they're "real"). Unfortunately, I have no idea where I might be able to find a reputable dealer of man-made diamonds, since they are still frowned upon by most people for some reason. Anyone have any ideas?

If you are going to spend an arm and a leg on a nice rock for your loved one I suggest you forgo the boring diamonds and purchase more rare gems. Depending on his/her favorite color you can always go with real emerals, tanzanite is quite popular, aquamarine is light enough like a diamond, rubies, alexandrite (now there is some legitimate value for your money), padparadscha sapphire, etc.

Like another poster said, the value is inflated artificially. Diamonds are the most common mineral aside from metals and quartz. If you spend so much, you might as well get your moneys real value and buy something unique.

Unless of course you got a generic fiance... *shrug*

I went to a local-ish place (it was about 90 miles away, but well worth the drive). Spent a few hours with the gemologist there who was very enthusiastic about showing me every single diamond they had in the store, under a microscope, so I could see what the imperfections looked like. He was really great about the whole process. Definitely see if you can find somebody within reasonable driving distance that's really enthusiastic about gemstones in general.

Not that it really makes a difference, but I wound up settling on a sapphire set in a custom-ish ring. Worked out well for all involved parties. http://www.raru.com if you're near Buffalo at all. (I know, their website is a disaster, but they're great people.)

If you're going to buy a diamond, do realize that you will be paying far more than the intrinsic of the diamond, and will mostly be paying for someone setting into a ring or such. You will never recoup the costs of the diamond, so if you are thinking of using it as an investment instrument, this is a bad call. Pretty jewelry yes, item of value, not really.

Also, beware the "conflict-free diamonds" scam. "Blood Diamond" was savaged for its misrepresentations, and anyone bringing it up in a good light is either ignorant, or less likely here, trying to scam you.. Very very few diamonds were "conflict diamonds," and you may be paying a premium for some lefty feel-good scam. If they're cheaper, fine, but don't pay a penny extra.

@dragonfire81: I wouldn't know how to complete the sentence because I'm one of those women who don't want diamond rings.

Incidentally, how is this post any more off topic than Connie Lee's?

@Ninjanice: Sapphires are a good choice.. they are second hardest compared to diamonds..

I started out with a sapphire ring, but we switched to a diamond ring on our last anniversary.. The reason? People couldn't tell I was *married* and I really was tired of getting shocked reactions when I mentioned my husband.

I still love sapphires though, and maybe if it was done in a more traditional way it would look more "married" than my ring looked.

@dragonfire81: unfettered access to the remote control 24/7?

@wildhare11: I get your point, but I don't think you (or anyone else) should assume that because a woman likes diamonds she is "generic"

@Frank Murphy:

I'm anti-diamond both because of the and the blood on the hands of the international diamond cartel.

I rented "Blood Diamond" (great movie) and watched it with my lady, then explained that on moral grounds I can't bring myself to buy diamonds. It's hard to read her sometimes, but I think she gets it, and respects me enough to be understanding.