"You know what they need to make? A zombie film starring reanimated furniture."

They made that movie. It's called Resident Evil: Extinction.

That was a good letter. I'm not surprised it worked, although it'd be nice if we didn't have to resort to EECBs to have companies do the right thing.

If you do shop there, be prepared to wait a LONG time to get the furniture you order. Last year I craigslist-ed my couch, and then went to Ashley and bought a sofa and love seat. It took SIX WEEKS for them to be delivered. I guess I expected they'd be in stock -- you know, at the warehouse. No. They typically wait to even manufacture some things until they're ordered.

I had already sold my old stuff before going in, so I went ahead with the order. It doesn't seem so bad now, but it kinda sucked, sitting on the office chair for a month and a half.

Just wanted to say; this has to be one of the best written EECBs I have read.

If you want overpriced, low-to-medium quality furniture, be sure to shop at Ashley. MDF FTW!

@eightfifteen: Nope, it's called Death Bed: The Bed That Eats

The best part is when he referenced the local attorney general by name. It makes it sound like he has his finger on the button ready to report them and is just waiting for their reply before proceeding.

@dorianh49: Overpriced? The stuff is bargain basement priced. Too low, actually. It's reflective of how totally shoddy the actual furniture is.

"The calls show up as coming from this inoperative number: 256-xxx-xxxx"

So, one solution to not waste time and money would be to simply not pick up the phone when a call comes in from that number. No? Still annoying, but you don't have to actually pick up the phone every time it rings.

A well written letter and a prompt and reasonable response from the company. Wow, that's...oh, wait-it's still April Fools' Day. :)

Attack...of the Ottoman Empire!
Only the Tick can save us now.

Please don't reconsider shopping at Ashley, their furniture is crap and you will only continue the problems to be had.

Awesome letter.

@youbastid: I don't know. I'd been furniture shopping for the new house for a couple months. The wife wanted a complete bedroom set (Eastern King Bed w/ headboard and footboard, dresser, mirror, chest and two nightstands), and our budget was about $1800. Among the several places we shopped was Ashley; their quality was noticeably lower than most of the other furniture stores, yet their prices were about the same. We couldn't find our set for under $2000, even with some haggling (and I'm a decent haggler).

We ended up buying from a local store that seemed to have imported everything from China, so that probably explains the low prices, but we got cherry-stained ash hardwood furniture, with gliding drawers made from dovetail-joined plywood instead of MDF, for $1700 including tax and delivery.

@youbastid: What about Rape Stove? (I hope you've heard the Patton Oswalt bit on Death Bed, or else I'll be sounding like I just crossed over a very uncool line...)

When my husband and I moved to Huntsville last year we actually went to the Ashley store in question to look for our first sofa (we had lived in a furnished studio apartment in Delaware since we got married) and the salesman was annoyingly pushy! Plus, they told us that to get said sofa we would have to wait 3 weeks for delivery. We needed furniture NOW so 3 weeks without a place to sit was out of the question.

Well, we decided to try our luck with a little independent place we saw over on University Drive. They were actually liquidating all of their Ashley floor models so we ended up with a reclining sofa that normally retails for around $1400 for $650. Plus, the salesman was able to get their delivery driver to get it to us that day with free delivery! Now THAT'S what I call service!

From what I've heard, that particular Ashley store is no good anyway. Lots of complaints with the BBB.

I always go with an independent retailer for large purchases. The independent guys have more to loose if a customer isn't happy.

Wait wait wait. You just found out that they unrelentingly robocall numbers in their database that they believe are held by their prior customers despite your repeated requests to stop calling the number they were calling. Don't rethink your original inclination to avoid their business, and absolutely have them send you that $4 and change check. It's not much, but it's the principle of the thing.

@youbastid: Yeah, but then the robocall ends up on your voice mail and you spend airtime clearing their messages out of the way to get to your real messages.

How about "Death Bed: The Bed that Eats"?

@jokono: When we bought our couch they waited until the sale was basically done to mention it would be 6 weeks before we would see it because it had to come from the factory. There ought to be a law about running a sale on items you don't even have in your possession yet. Then it took 10 weeks to actually get there and we didn't notice until after they left that it was the wrong color. The lifetime warranty covered the frame, not the cover. The sides were vinyl rather than leather and started to crumble right after the 1 year warranty expired. It was a Lane Sofa. One would expect something you paid close to $2000 for to not be a piece of crap. It was the last piece of new furniture I will ever buy.

@Megan Squier: By the way, that sofa is pretty nice. Ashley's cheaper stuff is really flimsy but the higher end stuff is good if you can get a good deal on it.

When I buy furniture I always go for the floor models on upholstered stuff and try to get the rest used.

For what it's worth - I bought a couple of rooms worth of furniture from Ashley last year and they delivered it promptly with no problems at all.

Maybe it's the store you're shopping at - but not all Ashley stores are less than honorable.

I have the same problem with Ashley here in Alabama. The calls are coming from a nearby store that is hosting the autodialer. I have called numerous times, spoken with "managers", filed complaints with the corporate website, and the national DNC list.

After receiving another call Tuesday and calling the store to complain I was assured that I would be removed due to massive fallout from that mornings calls. I was given Terri's name in Huntsville but no contact info. Is there any info for her or the corporate office that you can share?

@whuffo: The one in Huntsville is pretty bad from what the locals have said.

This is what happens when people make up whatever number to give at the checkout when they get asked for their phone numbers. Another innocent consumer suffers.

Instead, I recommend having the phone number of the Attorney General Consumer Protection Division office, some other business you don't like or something other cute and funny but not another random consumer who will get hurt this way. As you can see, not funny.

Regardless of how it started, though, the business should have to pay the treble damages plus court costs under the Telephone Consumer Protection Act. No the first time meant NO. Why did 5 morons at different times tell him they would remove it and then not remove it? The person mismanaging the process at this company to this result should be sued as a co-defendant and pay out money too. When people start being personally liable for their actions against consumers at work, things will change.

@B: Oh, no, it's Chairface Chippendale!

I notice in the feeble apology from the company is no acknowledgement of any wrongdoing by the company, no acknowledgement of calling the writer without permission, and no explanation as to how the company got his number in the first place. The last is especially important in preventing other asshole-companies calling in the future.

I had a similar problem with Capitulation One when they were spewing their credit cards in the 1990s. I got repeated voice calls (at least weekly) and wouldn't take no for an answer, or even a slammed receiver.

Their local brain-dead branch said, "Not our problem."

I called the 1-800 to get them to stop. The "supervisor" said - exact words - "Fuck off. Deal with it." and hung up.

It was only after I called their head-up-their-asses office - collect - and reported what the "supervisor" had said to me that they finally stopped acting like idiots.

People who are not customers of businesses should not have to put up with this shit. If politicians had any decency, all telemarketing would be opt in only - if the customer doesn't give permission, they can't call, not ever.

@youbastid: And I'm fairly certain they charge per voice mail, too. And "just ignore" is not a solution.

@Con Sumer Zealot: It's also possible that someone else had the number before and it was reassigned...since that happens all the time.

@Tom Neil:
Terri's email is: tgmoore@ashleyalabama.com

@youbastid:

I'm the OP. The phone in question is one that I use only for "emergency" calls from my children, wife, or parents. So I just sort of automatically answer it. (Plus, I'd have to put on my glasses to read the caller-id.)

I'm afraid I'm a bit of a cell phone Luddite. A more sophisticated user could probably block the calls too.

@jokono: The reason that happens is because this is typically "build to order" so they do not tie up money in inventory or stock.

Now I wonder why auto dealers/manufacturers couldn't do the same thing...

@P_Smith: "It was only after I called their head --- office - collect"

I am guessing you called as if you were overseas. Otherwise how did they actually take your call?

@bohemian: We have this amazing place called Luxury of Leather here in the Dallas area that I would suggest to you if you leave anywhere close. They are local, but they sell leather furniture that is 100% leather, custom made, and high quality stuff. In fact the salesman told us he first got his start going to big name furniture stores on Saturdays and showing all the customers how the $2000 leather sofas have all the problems you just mentioned and would give them his card.

I cannot rave on this place enough. Everything is solid plywood and real leather. It isn't built until you order and we received ours 7 days later (the factory is local as well). The couch has a 5 year warranty that covers scratches (on the protected leathers) and we paid less than $2000 for it. The service was amazing, we told him our budget and while it was over by $50, that number included the shipping, which we originally were not going to pay for.

Anyway, hopefully by the time you do decided its OK to buy new furniture, this place will have expanded a bit or there will be a similar company near you.

@dorianh49: We've had our best luck with a local furniture store as well. They make everything custom, but its the same price as any of the bigger chains/dept stores and the quality is infinitely better.

@Megan Squier: I defintely agree. We it comes to furniture, we've had such great experiences at local, independent companies whereas big places are just pushy or they ignore you.

@tbax929: unfortunately he could have made an easy $5k by taking it to court before dropping the bomb.

@youbastid: Another solution would have been to sue the company. According to a post a few months ago, you'd done everything you were supposed to, you recorded when and where you received the calls, you asked and verified repeatedly that they wouldn't call you on that number and they repeated violated that. If you were as frustrated as you came off in your letter you could have easily made a few thousand...isn't it $500 a call?

@jokono: It's called "just in time" manufacturing. It is actually a pretty common system for large retailers, though they should have told you in advance.