Share:
Add to Favorites   |  

Surviving A Lynch Mob - AIG Internal Staff Memo

37236 views

Via Gawker: Considering the profound social unrest surrounding just about every aspect of their entire existence, AIG disseminated the following memo to their staffers to help them avoid getting hoisted by their necktie the nearest lamppost.


I'm not sure this list was entirely comprehensive. Feel free to add your additional suggestions to AIG employees in the comments.

AIG Corporate Security's Tips for Surviving an Angry Mob [Gawker]

Post a comment

Comments:

123
user-pic

clearly this is all the medias fault /biggest eye-roll ever/

user-pic

Wow...quite surprising that a company doesn't want it's employees to wear logo attire. But it's not surprising that the one company that doesn't is AIG.

user-pic

"Due to increased public attention..."


Apparently, attention=anger now.

user-pic

The sad thing is that there are some scary people out there. No matter what problems people have with AIG as a company, or with what decisions individuals working there made, the individuals working there don't deserve to be stalked and beaten because of it.

I worked for a company that went through a series of owners who each made poor financial decisions getting the company farther and farther into debt. After several months of struggling and getting farther and farther behind on any money owed, there were a lot of people pissed at that company. The receptionist ended up getting a phone call that someone was "coming down there right now" with some vague threats. Blinds were closed, curtains drawn, building secured and all non-essential staff sent home. Supervisors were discouraging people from exiting the building for anything other than leaving for the day, and if anyone was leaving for the day, someone watched to make sure they made it safely to their car. It was nice that management took the threats seriously, but pretty scary to have to be in that kind of environment. The really unfortunate part is that the people who made the decisions that got the company into that state didn't work in the building or even in the same state. So they were safely out of harm's way.

user-pic

So, we can assume increased security at all AIG facilities, and the standard-issue deployment gear roster now must include not just the cream pie, but also a bike or skakeboard for a swooping approach/attack and a swift escape.

And yes, of course this is advocating violence, but a pie in the face is the least violent of so many choices. Be happy that we chose to count coup on these Pop-Tarts with cream pies.

No, even "Pop-Tart" is too good for these clowns, as Pop-Tarts are loved by many small children. They are mere "Generic Toaster Pastries"

user-pic

"the US congress had NO problem with these bonuses when they bailed out AIG"

The US Congress didn't bail out AIG. George W. Bush did.

user-pic

They missed something: If they see an angry lynch mob, it does no good to run. Pull out your bonus money and throw it to the mob.

user-pic

@jfischer: I actually like the generic toaster pastries better than Pop-Tarts.

user-pic

Where can I get an AIG T-Shirt & AIG hat

user-pic

Now we watch the news and wait... some poor schmuck will be needlessly killed.

user-pic

It's going to be interesting to wear my Manchester United jersey this weekend (which is emblazoned with a massive AIG logo). So far, I've only received a few comments, but my Dad refuses to wear his. He's gone back to his "Vodafone" sponsored kit from about five years ago.

user-pic

Right... nothing going on right now with the economy, America, or the mentality of people has anything to do with the past eight years of shit heaped upon the country I love. Also, as far as changing the constitution maybe you should talk to your buddy George Bush about that...

user-pic

That was supposed to be a reply to Valor...

user-pic

Makes me wonder how long it will be until they rebrand to escape the stigma they've created for themselves.


I say they've asked for, and received, everything that is coming their way these days.

user-pic

This reminds me of a story I heard from Michael Moore once. I think when he was doing Sick-o, companies sent out memo's on how to deal w/Michael Moore, even giving out specials numbers, and one company went to the extreme to higher a Michael Moore look alike to "train" their people.

user-pic

@valor77:

"Democrat Party"

That right there makes me not willing to listen to anything you just said.

user-pic

@Justin Larson: Oh yeah, I forgot that the Executive Branch writes bills, skips past the Congress, and signs them into law. Oh wait, that's not how it happens. The Democrat congress wrote the TARP bill, with no provisions for restricting AIG bailouts. Now they're trying to cover up their own stupidity by distracting us with AIG.

user-pic

@djsyndrome: Yup, Bush did it all by himself. He used his evil Republican fairy dust to bypass the Congress altogether and create and sign his very own TARP bill.

user-pic

@dohtem: And then the public is the "bad guy"...

user-pic

@valor77: I had a communications position at Planned Parenthood for a short period in the 90s. We didn't have fire drills; we had bomb drills. Did the GOP turn average citizens into bad people?

AIG can suck it up and deal with it.

user-pic

@Russell Miller: You got it - bury your head in the sand. Ignore the facts and let your emotions drive you.


Republicans -> Republican Party
Democrats -> Democrat Party


I guess I'll start calling them Democratics from now on so you'll read my posts. :)

user-pic

Paranoia? A sense that bad things happening to b-a-a-a-a-d people? Wishy-washy local news watching idiots who confuse any vague internet post saying, "Those rotten bast*ards should be hung" with a real threat? Or a transparent, cynical attempt to garner sympathy from a justifiably irate public?
You be the judge.

user-pic

@valor77:

So public outrage at a company essentially owned by the taxpayers paying hundreds of millions of dollars in 'retention bonuses' as unemployment climbs and the credit markets freeze is somehow attributable to A democratic president who has been in office for 60 days?

If you honestly believe that the outrage (not the threats of violence) at AIG is anything other than justified, than I don't think that you are capable of listening to any logic that is not 'brought to you buy the EIB network.'

I'd love to hear your thoughts on how to fix the economy by letting companies pay off executives complicit in the meltdown of the economy with millions of dollars in bonuses.

user-pic

@valor77: You're right. In fact, they should get the Medal of Honor for their sterling service to America.
Perhaps of GW Bush isn't busy, and if he hasn't already given out his quota, he could do the honors? I recall his standards are almost as low as yours are.

user-pic

@bigroblee: Good - lots of facts to back up your assertions. Very compelling. Contracts are law - no matter how stupid you happen to think those contracts are. The fact that the Congress was too stupid to stop the bonuses before it bailed out AIG doesn't give them the right to rewrite the law on the fly or us the US tax code as a weapon to achieve their populist political agenda.

user-pic

I feel bad for the people at AIG who had nothing to do with the meltdown - all the office managers, IT personnel, and the like. It must suck having to work there with all the public scrutiny.

I'd say they should get another job, but we all know how well that would work.

user-pic

@valor77:

No, Democrats => Democratic party.

Problem is, the only people who seem to make that particular error tend to be the hard right ideologues. Which is why that particular turn of phrase makes me skeptical of anything you might say. Your response, of course, was not helpful in reversing that impression.

user-pic

OK, my question is how much more of our taxpayer money are they gonna pee away on extra "security" for their bonehead employees? If they were more diligent with securing everybody's fund they wouldn't be in the mess they're in now,

user-pic

@Michael Worth: They have already announced the fact that will eventually change their name.

user-pic

If you aren't paranoid, better start taking lessions.

user-pic

Yeah, the media attention on this is getting too crazy and nearly lynch-mob status... I mean come on, the VAST majority of people working for AIG were in NO position to realize what was going on let alone do something about it and they certainly aren't the ones getting big bonuses.

Please don't lynch the AIG admin's or IT guys...

user-pic

Just because they are paranoid doesn't mean there aren't crazy people out there willing to take it to the "next level".

Either, it's better to be safe and prepared rather than dead and not.

I'm philosophizing.

user-pic

Given that the Senate (Banking Committee) and White House (Secretary of Treasury) knew about these bonuses and agreed to them months ago, then turned around and whipped everyone into a frenzy over them in the last few weeks, I think that the executive and legislative branches of government should be held accountable for the safety of AIG employees.

What a great way to turn around the company, with pitchfork and torches. Make every qualified potential employee avoid them like the plague, for fear of their lives. Yeah, that'll fix AIG.

user-pic

It's one thing for people to be simply "outraged" or "disgusted" about the bonuses at AIG; it's an entirely different thing for people to become so wrapped up in it and so vengeful that they would actually threaten or wish violence upon these people. I really have to lay some blame at the feet of the government here. With Congressmen encouraging these execs to commit suicide, Congress passing vengeful tax legislation and the ever-present sound bites available from Senators, Representatives and "Senior White House aids", it's no surprise that average people have decided this kind of behavior is acceptable. God forbid anyone rationally sit down and look at the situation; it's much easier to just get super angry and spew hatred and threats at these people. I hate to use such a broad term, but this has turned into nothing more than pure class warefare. Congress has seized the opportunity to pander to the "average" citizen who can't even comprehend a $1mil bonus and has blown this situation so far out of proportion it's gotten ridiculous. I don't blame the "Democrats", the "Liberals", the "Republicans" or the "Conservatives", I blame the government as a whole. All of our elected representatives have allowed the anger of an uninformed (or under-informed) public to take over their logic and have done nothing more than spread fuel on this fire.

user-pic

@valor77: Congress added the bonus language to avoid litigating the contracted bonuses at an even greater taxpayer expense. Fact of the matter is these bonuses were based either on retention or performance and in either case who among them could possibly deserve a bonus for either performance or to be retained.

user-pic

There are some very bad people at AIG. There is no doubt of that. But that doesn't mean it's in good taste to make light of some very real threats that have been made against them.

user-pic

I don't feel sorry for people who work for AIG at all. If our system was not totally broken there would be more public outrage for all the things that ALL big companies out to screw the general public.

Before the internet issues like this would be swept under the carpet and ignored by the corporate controlled news media. Because of coverage by blogs and other non corporate controlled media this issue made it into the spot light. Even the Obama Administration has dirty hands with this reacting the Monday after the checks were cut and cashed and accepting AIG campaign contributions. Obama how about you giving back your AIG dirty campaign money to the American taxpayers?

user-pic

@cynical_bastard: ... well, yeah, along with the dunderheads which let it get this far in the first place.

user-pic

@Russell Miller: Somehow I doubt your impression would be reversed by anything I said.


@Trai_Dep: My standards are backing up my assertions with facts, not personal attacks. Are you saying it requires low standards to give out the Medal of Honor to valiant troops in the line of duty? You should be ashamed.


@Secret Agent Man: I said nothing about the President. If you'll actually read AND comprehend my post, you'll notice I was talking about the Pelosi-and-Reid controlled Congress. Let me walk you through the timeline:


1) AIG creates bonus contracts that reward employees for objective results.


2) A bursting housing bubble and an abundance of sub-prime mortgage defaults cause AIGs over-valued mortgage-backed securities to loose virtually all of their value.


3) For the "good of the country", the TARP bill gives AIG a multi-billion dollar loan to keep the company afloat. No limiting of contracted bonuses was in the bill.


4) The Congress acts outraged that the contractually-obligated bonuses would be paid - when they themselves could have stopped it legislatively.


5) The Congress uses the tax code and anti-corporate populist sentiment to deny the bonuses, and stokes so much anti-AIG sentiment that regular employees have to fear for their safety.


Sound about right?

user-pic

@Trai_Dep: ... given some of the crazies running around these days (see: 4 schools in DE getting either gunman threats or bomb threats today), I'm going with number one.

The public doesn't give a flying fuck who they string up for it - anything with AIG on it, including the cubicle-worker who has nothing to do with it, seems to be fair game these days. It's sad you can't see past your own agenda to realize this.

user-pic

@madog: furthermore, When ever there is enoygh money, power, women, or reputation at stake within a large group of people you can bet that someone is going to do something stupid like launch a nuke or kill someone. People have and kill/hurt others for much, much less.

user-pic

@hilltop_sniper: That's a good point. However, do you think AIG, knowing the public outcry that would follow, would give retention and performance-based bonuses to employees if they weren't contractually (and therefore, legally) obligated to do so?

user-pic

For more info on why the bonuses were written into the contract, FiveThirtyEight.com has a well written article.

[www.fivethirtyeight.com]

and while I'm at it

@valor77:
Veto, filibuster... there are things the minority party can do...

user-pic

@Russell Miller: The threadjacking by people like Valor gets really tiresome.

user-pic

This actually made me sad, for some reason. I don't like the idea of the janitor being worried that his badge is showing on the subway, you know? When people jump the chasm to violence, they're not always the most discriminating people, ya know?

user-pic

And on top of this dogpile is none other than Barack Obama. What a low place Obama has taken the presidency when a sitting president joins the lynch mob instead of speaking out against it. Blood will be on his hands and that of Congress.

What a lousy president he's shaping up to be.

user-pic

I have no problem with the lowly worker, I do have a problem with the CEO's with the bonuses that equal my yearly pay.

user-pic

@bohemian: Dude, I didn't threadjack. The AIG security memo was a direct result of the anti-AIG fervor stirred up by the Congress. My posts are directly related to the topic. Maybe you don't know what threadjacking is, or maybe you just disagree with me. Hopefully the former.

user-pic

Those security measures listed in the AIG memo were standard protocol in the public corporation I worked for. The only different advice in this memo is to refrain from wearing the AIG logo. And right now, that advice is probably unnecessary. If I were with AIG I'd prefer to wear a paper bag over my head than advertise any connection to AIG.