10 Human Teeth Found In Walmart Wallet

According to the Cape Cod Times an unidentified shopper was browsing through the wallets at a Falmouth, MA Walmart, when he unzipped one of the compartments and found a surprise — ten human teeth. One of them even had a filling.

The man turned the teeth over to the store’s management but left before police arrived. According to the paper, the teeth are from an adult and because they had no blood or gum tissue attached, they can’t be tested for DNA.

“We’re not aware of anything like this happening in the past, and we believe this to be an isolated incident,” said Ashley Hardie, a Wal-Mart spokeswoman.

Police are hoping the shopper will come forward so they can speak with him.

Teeth found in wallet at Falmouth Wal-Mart [Cape Cod Times]
(Photo:genebob)

Comments

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  1. Adrienne Willis says:

    I am thinking the tooth fairy bought the wallet, didnt like it after she used it and returned it.

  2. fatcop says:

    Untrue. You don’t need blood or gum tissue to extract DNA from teeth.

  3. HogwartsAlum says:

    GROSS!!!

  4. Drowner says:

    CREEPY. How do you just leave after that? Wouldn’t curiosity demand that you stick around to figure out where they came from?

  5. SomeoneGNU says:

    So that’s where I left them!

  6. Radi0logy says:

    This doesn’t make any sense at all. I can not imagine a single plausible, common sense reason for why ANYONE would want to stash teeth in a wallet at Wal-Mart. Giving out cookies for the person that comes up with the most believeable story!

    • batsy says:

      @Radi0logy: Fetish?

    • calquist says:

      @Radi0logy: But the person with the real story can’t actually eat the cookies because he/she doesn’t have any teeth :(

    • Canino says:

      @Radi0logy:
      1. Cow eats person.
      2. Cow gets made into wallet.
      3. Remains of person found in wallet.

      Somewhere there’s a purse with a free pair of glasses in the pocket.

    • The Porkchop Express says:

      @Radi0logy: A guy at the wallet factory (in some horrid third world place) sneezed causing ten of his teeth (probably the good ones too) to fal out. He put them in his wallet in hopes of getting them put back in. Since he works in a wallet factory in a horrid third world country, his wallet was actually his first paycheck and thus was brand new and devoid of any items other than the teeth.

      He went on his lunch break (really just a juice break now) and accidently dropped his wallet on the production line right before the packing machine.

      and the rest, well that’s history.

    • metaled says:

      @Radi0logy:
      He lives in the UK and is one of the millions of Europeans practicing DIY Dentistry! Wallmart sells drills and pliers don’t they?

      [news.bbc.co.uk]

      Homedepot, the Place for DIY home improvement!
      Wallmart, The Place for DIY dentistry!

    • MyPetFly says:

      @Radi0logy:

      Just for the fun of it is why I’d do it. If I only had ten teeth to spare…

    • Hyman Decent says:

      @Radi0logy: Made in China. ‘Nuff said.

  7. Bigrobot says:

    Somewhere in rural Massachusetts, an Alzheimer’s patient gently weeps while trying to gum his jello…

  8. Segador says:

    I’m surprised that Walmart let him leave without checking his receipt and/or paying for the teeth.

  9. N.RobertMoses says:

    There is probably some slave labourer in China who is missing their teeth no doubt for some minor infraction in the wallet production process.

  10. catnapped says:

    Must be *some* way to blame the victim but I can’t think of it right now.

    No doubt someone will be right over to rectify that….

    • MichaelLC says:

      @catnapped: Well, he as shopping at WallMart*, which is a crime in itself.

      Also, why did he unzip the wallet? Isn’t that a breach of the WULA?

      Clearly they were a criminal if they left before the police arrived – otherwise they would have nothing to hide.

      [Obviously jokes]

  11. emona says:

    I thought it was possible to get DNA from teeth?
    Either way this is creepy as hell. There’s a couple reasons one might lose 10 teeth, and none of them are very pleasant.

  12. McNugget911_GitEmSteveDave says:

    If any of them are front teeth, please contact me. They were removed against my will by my Ex.

  13. sir_eccles says:

    I wonder how much he’d get if he sent the fillings in to cash4gold.

  14. jscott73 says:

    Hmmm, I wonder where the rest of the teeth, the rest of the body for that matter, are.

  15. ElizabethD says:

    They are left over from those skulls on the Totenkopf tee-shirts.

    That’s my theory.

  16. wgrune says:

    What good would extracting the DNA from the teeth do them anyway? You need something to compare the DNA to to be able to determine a match, correct? I don’t think we’ve quite reached the point where law abiding citizen’s DNA is stored in a big database somewhere.

    • nakedscience says:

      @wgrune: It’s possible the person with the missing teeth has a record, and frankly I wouldn’t be surprised.

      You CAN get DNA from teeth by grinding them down, but they probalby can’t justify the cost.

    • fatcop says:

      @wgrune: You haven’t been to Kansas then.

      If you are arrested for a felony charge (not convicted, just arrested) your dna is taken.

      After this year (or next, I dont recall) a misdemeanor arrest will get your dna taken.

    • McNugget911_GitEmSteveDave says:

      @wgrune: Well, you can also get family members if they have alleals in common, or at least that’s what Saddel, the horse-toothed CSI taught me.

    • failurate says:

      @wgrune: They will probably be running them against unclaimed or unidentified bodies.

  17. tc4b says:

    Store manager to staff at Team Meeting:

    “…and another thing. No extra breaks for teeth falling out!”

  18. Chris Walters says:

    Maybe Charlie from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia went shopping at Walmart.

    [www.fancast.com]

    (clip slightly NSFW)

  19. Charlotte Rae's Web says:

    wal*mart fight club stash?

  20. Rectilinear Propagation says:

    I’m trying to think of how someone could have put the teeth there without violence being involved.

    A mortician who went nuts?

  21. Ryan Joy says:

    Turns out those belong to Nick Nolte: [twitter.com]

  22. unobservant says:

    Let me put on my strobe light and Massive Attack CD and I’ll have those DNA results to you stat.

  23. Borax-Johnson says:

    Based upon my local Wal Mart, I’d say they belong to one of the greeters.

  24. HiPwr says:

    By the time the government gets done printing up money to cover the bail-outs/hand-outs, we’ll all probably be paying for goods and services with teeth.

  25. mtp says:

    That’s kind of freaky, I mean… one or two teeth I’d understand, accidents happen but 10?

    Someone somewhere got punished for not working fast enough…

  26. Robert Synnott says:

    Dentist disposing of biohazardous waste (I think teeth, or just about anything removed from a human, qualify) on the cheap?

  27. OldElvis says:

    I can hear Jeff Foxworthy Now:

    IF you carry your teeth in your wallet, you might be a redneck.

  28. TemporaryAphasia says:

    I can’t be the only one giggling that the store is in a city called FALMOUTH. Harharhar.

  29. MyPetFly says:

    If he’d kept it overnight, the Tooth Fairy would have left 10 quarters for him. Dummy.

  30. From the cubicle of PGibbons says:

    It is comforting to know that presently manufactured wallets are capable of holding at least 10 teeth. Hopefully more.

    At the rate the dollars are being printed, “mouth money” may be stabler currency sooner than we think…

  31. Youdont Knowme says:

    Come on guys, this one is SO easy to figure out.
    His/her teeth were going to be used as “bling” or even zipper pulls, on the wallets that were made from his/her skin.

    I bet they used his/her hair to weave a rug.
    Best place to hide a body: Wal-Mart

  32. MarvinMar says:

    Where did this take place again?
    Fallmouth? hehehe
    Sounds like what these teeth did.

  33. RedwoodFlyer says:

    Well…since Wal-Mart’s HQ is in Arkansas, I guess it clears them of any possible wrongdoing!

  34. Stream Of Consciousness says:

    WTF??!

  35. Con Seannery is apparently an ADMIN... says:

    The Official Wal*Mart Meth Wallet.

  36. tankertodd says:

    In a Yakov voice: “In China, the Wallet bites YOU!”

  37. tworld says:

    What the f!*# is going on in this country!!!

  38. cheesebubble says:

    HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!