Well, this explains that Goombah Pizzeria owner’s apparent anger management issues: he was a former hit-man who’d served prison time in 2004 after pleading guilty to 2 murders.
Gothamist writes that “Joey Calco, the man who made a name for himself when he turned on the Bonanno crime family and ratted out consigliere Anthony Spero in 2001, has been living in Florida and running a pizza place under the name Joseph Milano.” We wonder if competing pizza joints in the area will start placing signs in their windows that read, “NOT affiliated with the mob!”—or if that would just invite more pistol whippings.
“Mob Turncoat’s Identity Outed After a Fight Over a Calzone” [Gothamist] (Thanks to Alexa!)
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So doesn’t that defeat the point of being protected when your real name is in the papers?
@hewhoroams: I believe one of the rules in the witness protection plan is that you not start building up a new rap sheet. This loose torpedo obviously yearns for his old life – and now, it may come to visit him. Karma.
@hewhoroams: Anger issues.
@hewhoroams: That’s what makes this guy such an idiot. He goes and gets himself arrested even though there’s a decent chance it might also get him killed. He could have just as easily kicked the customer out of his store instead of throwing a temper tantrum.
@hewhoroams: Yeah it seems like it. I mean, the guy obviously did something stupid, but that doesn’t mean he should just be strung up and laid out for his former employers to come gut him.
He’s an idiot, but there is something unscrupulous about a media culture that will print this guy’s name and show his face without a second thought.
@Rhayader: Yeah, working in the news industry I’d say this blurs the ethical line.
However, it would have come up when he was arrested making it public info, and considering the Mob has more connections than any newsie I’m aware of, this guy probably screwed himself before ink hit paper.
@Rhayader: Ummmm….he beat a TWO customers WITH A GUN. Oh – he was also previously convicted (only two years) FOR MURDER. DO you seriously feel sorry for him because his identity came out after he, a convicted felon mind you, commited another felony?
@Rhayader: So, on the off-chance that any subject of any story is under Witness Protection, papers shouldn’t list ANY names or pictures?
If not, by the time that the follow-up article came up, Gumba’s face was widely distributed across the continent, so including it didn’t imperil him much further. And, how else could they cover the follow-up without mentioning the original crime, and then the Gumba’s identity?
I think the lesson here is, if you’re under Witness Protection and blow your cover by pistol-whipping people, don’t expect good things to result. Imagine that.
@Trai_Dep,tptcat: Woah there folks, take a look at what I said. I realize this guy was an idiot and put himself in this situation.
My only point is that I wouldn’t want to be in the business of revealing protected witnesses to their former employers. Sheesh, I know the guy is an idiot, lay off.
@Rhayader:
Looks like he can be reinstated in the program as a prisoner. Interestingly, the victims of his crime are eligible for compensation from the Victims Compensation Fund:
[people.howstuffworks.com]
@Rhayader: I think your point was lost in the parts of your statement that defended the dude’s privacy of identity.
@Rhayader: I really don’t think that the media is “in the business of revealing protected witnesses to their former employers.” They’re in the business of reporting news, and someone who pistol-whips his customers makes news. I don’t think that the local paper or TV station or whomever is ethically bound to protect the identity of someone who is hellbent on eliminating themselves from the gene pool, especially when they have already killed people.
I wonder if he knows Crabman?
@yajjo: I think it’s off to Alaska for him. His Inuit name will be “Dances With Calzones”
Great, a hitman does a few years, and now he’s totally not a danger to society…
@Darrone: Pleading guilty to two murders, and in under 5 years he’s already out and running a pizza shop?
Only in America.
@Darrone: Just don’t ask for no pepperonis and he won’t have to wack ya.
@Darrone:
I read a really interesting book a few years ago: _WITSEC: Inside the Federal Witness Protection Program_ by Pete Earley and Gerald Shur. The second author was one of the founders of the Witness Protection program in the 1960′s, and was considering writing his memoirs when he learned that Pete Earley had been researching WITSEC for a book. They collaborated and no doubt it’s a better book than either could have written alone. There’s some political history, some government and FBI history, and some mafia history. They do a good job of explaining why the program was begun, as well as its strengths and weaknesses.
Some of the brutal parts were difficult to read – I don’t like stuff like that. I was glad I read the book, though – interesting.
So if someone in the program commits a crime, do they lose the protection?
@chargernj: According to the Gothamist post, he was identified by a Daytona newspaper that noticed he looked a lot like the mobster.
@chargernj:
I think they do get booted, although it may only be after a conviction. Personally, I make it a point to never cross that line…
@chargernj: depends on the crime, and how valuable they are. Sometimes they get to skate becasue protecting them is more important that puting them in jail.
Perhaps it was a typo on the court papers and he got put in the Witness Publicity Program?
@FooSchnickens: Fantastic.
Joey Calco >> Joseph Milano? Is that the best that witness protection could do?
Also, pistol whipping a college student for complaining about your food? Way to keep a low profile, Joey!
Also, also, Ex-mob hitman Joe Milano running a pizzeria? Too many italian-american stereotypes rolled into one! o.O
@ludwigk: Not to mention living in Florida. No Italians from New York ever go there.
@badhatharry: Maybe he was originally in North Dakota but couldn’t get a good market for real Italian style pizza…
@ludwigk: Also, also, Ex-mob hitman Joe Milano running a pizzeria? Too many italian-american stereotypes rolled into one!
You caught that one too, eh?
I think I’ll be watching The Sopranos when I get home.
@ludwigk:
Not just running a pizza place, but a pizza placed named Goombah Pizzeria.
@madanthony: Well, it could have been a Godfather’s Pizza franchise.
@xay: I’m surprised you are the first and only one (that I see) to have mentioned Godfather’s Pizza. That was the first thing I thought of.
@madanthony: I would have went with Badda-Bing.
@ludwigk: I would think keeping the name change subtle reduces the time it takes to get accustomed to answering to a different name.
@ludwigk: This is actually going to make a great sitcom, I just know it!
@ludwigk: This may officially now be my favorite Consumerist story ever.
Wow, pleaded guilty to 2 murders in 2004, and out of prison with enough time to start up a pizza company by 2009? Not really a fan of how our criminal justice system is based on informational bribes.
@youbastid:
That was exactly what I was thinking.
@youbastid:
Especially when someone else can send spam email and get 9 years in prison, or a teenager can send nude pictures of himself to his gf and get years in prison and put on a sex offender list for life.
@Saboth: Killing other criminals isn’t that bad, but destroying your own purity is sin.
Remember the end of Goodfellas… the credits said he was indicted on charges while in protection, his wife divorced him eventually, etc.
Also– I know one mobster type said Sopranos was pretty close to reality- I guess it is!
@JGKojak: Hah yeah, “College” from season 1, anybody?
[southpark] Dumb-dumb-dumb-dumb-dumb! [/southpark]
They should have changed his name to Stanley because he’s a huge tool. I’d like to see him beat with his own sign for naming the place ‘Goombah’. What a fucktard.
This wouldn’t have happened at the Olive Garden.
@EBounding: I’d much rather whip people with the breadsticks than a pistol.
@EBounding: Nothing remotely authentically Italian would have happened at the Olive Garden.
It’s not like mobsters generally kill innocents, they kill other mobsters.
Also, anyone who has seen “My Blue Heaven” would have a healthy understanding of the Witness Protection program works.
@semanticantics:
If it’s anything like In Plain Sight, sign me up – that blond chick can protect my identity any day.
@semanticantics:It’s not like mobsters generally kill innocents, they kill other mobsters.
Yeah, They only PISTOL WHIP innocents!
@metaled: You don’t often die from pistol whippings. i think. maybe a little inside. Now the victim has a cool story to tell, and a scar to go with it. chicks dig scars.
@skizsrodt: A cool story? ” So, i was bitching about my calzone when this dude jumped the counter and whooped my ass. Yea.. I’m pretty cool”. We all know girls love a guy who can take a good pistol whipping….
@semanticantics: I saw My Blue Heaven, and while I may not know how the Witness Protection Program works, I do know what Arugula is. It’s a vegetable.
@semanticantics: Yeah, committing a heinous crime and breaking the law is okay if you’re doing it to people who do the same thing.
Where’s Steve Martin and Rick Moranis when you really need them?
That’s the worst hiding job since Obi-Wan Kenobi became “Old Ben Kenobi” and hid cleverly on his arch-nemesis’ home planet.
@winstonthorne: LOL too bad the goombah didn’t have jedi mind tricks, then the customer could’ve pistol whipped himself!
@winstonthorne: “This is not the calzone you are looking for”
This is cheesy enough to have been a feature film. Joe Pesci’s career is NOT over after all!!!
You can’t make this stuff up folks.
Hey It s Crab Man
aha! so he’s in the Witless Protection Program?
@KhaiJB: Git ‘er Done!
If he disappears, I think I will hold off on any “pepperoni” or “Italian sausage” for a while.
Agent: Tell you what, sir. From now on, you’ll be, uh, Homer Thompson at Terror Lake. Let’s just practise a bit, hmm? When I say, “Hello, Mr. Thompson,” you’ll say, “Hi.”
Homer: Check.
Agent: Hello, Mr. Thompson.
Homer: [stares blankly]
Agent: Remember now, your name is Homer Thompson.
Homer: I gotcha.
Agent: Hello, Mr. Thompson.
Homer: [stares blankly]
[A long time later]
Agent: [sighs in frustration] Now, when I say, “Hello, Mr. Thompson,” and press down on your foot, you smile and nod.
Homer: No problem.
Agent: Hello, Mr. Thompson! [stomps on Homer's foot a few times]
Homer: [stares blankly]
[to other agent] I think he’s talking to _you_.
@Canino: Hah, is that the episode where he becomes the jailhouse snitch?
I love the huge “Snitch Life” necklace.
@Rhayader: I believe this was the one where Sideshow Bob escaped prison. IIRC, this is right after Homer is dissapointed he can’t be John Elway. Which is ironic b/c when Hank Scorpio gave him the Denver Bronco’s, he was wasn’t happy.
@ApologeticBale_GitEmSteveDave: Ahh ok, thanks.
@Canino: I was so very, very tempted to post this exact same scene. Glad you did!
Anyone who has ever been to Palm Coast should not be surprised at all. That place is 70% retired 30% witness protection.
Witness protection? Was he a needle hiding in a haystack, or a needle hiding in a box of needles?
A former mobster, in witness protection, opens up a pizzeria named “Goombah’s”…
@ForrestWhitakersLazyEye: And then removes Forrest Whitaker’s lazy eye over a failure to come through on the Vig.
@ForrestWhitakersLazyEye: Hey, it’s truth in advertising!
So your saying Goombah pizza isn’t just a clever name?
…Is it just me, or does the mob family name sound suspiciously like “Banana”? I knew Carmen Miranda had to be hiding something in her hat!
Finally, a pizzeria that won’t kidnap and kill you!
oh wait…
This guy’s skills at hiding remind me of a friend’s experience …
He was in a very tiny bar way out in the sticks of his western state. There were two guys in track suits, gold chains and slicked back hair hanging out and my friend made some comment about “What, are you in the witness protection program or something?” They shot him dirty looks then approached him later when he was outside telling him to keep that kind of talk down because they actually were.
He advised them to attempt to blend in a bit more.
So he was a hitman. Killed some people. Ratted out his old pals. And they gave him a pizza place?
Are there application forms for the mob? Do they do that?
I think that his years in prison really reformed the guy. After all he did only pistol whipped the person, and did not kill him outright. True reformation.
I am trying to be conerned about his safety, given that he has been outed by the news media……
Nope. Not concerned.
let’s see if he makes a guest appearance on “Shark Week”.
Wow. Cute, but no brains. If I were in Witness Protection, I’d most likely not own my own business at all. I’d just want to work at an insurance company and STFU a lot.