How much would someone have to pay you to have your kids watch a penis? Comcast answers that question by giving a $5 one-time discount to every subscriber in Tucson, AZ who had their cerebellum gelatinized by seeing the porno movie that accidentally cut into the Super Bowl last night, according to a rumor a reporter we know overheard in their newsroom.
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At hotels, you pay them when you want to see a porn on a tv.
@Mooshie: I think you misunderstood. Those who saw the porn are being charged $14.95, but they are being given a $5 discount. Much like the Tru-Coat in Fargo.
/sarcasm
@Mooshie: In Arizona, the porn pays you.
@InfiniTrent: In Soviet Russia, football interupts porn!
(I don’t know this for fact, just making a joke).
@Mooshie: Funny, Jersey motels have a free hardcore porn channel.
5 bucks? your breaking my balls comcast.
@Obijuan:
TOTALLY off topic but I adore your screen name!
The clip from internet blog “Consumerist” shows Comcast CEO Brian Roberts sitting on a couch and struggling to pull out $5 from his pocket. The other executives laugh at the difficulty. Mr. Roberts then jumps up and pulls his wallet out and shakes his head from side to side, slapping his hand against his forehead, and then the game comes back on.
@Ash78: LOL!
@Ash78:
Awesome!
Comcast: “Psst, hey buddy. I’ll give you $5 if I can show you my penis.”
Yeah, well is Comcast going to get fined for this little fracass? $5 per customer might be nothing compared to this.
Ironic that they introduced all of these network time delays (Obama’s inauguration on CNN was something like 7 seconds off the actual timing) only to be thwarted by the local boozers.
Seriously though, if my kids caught sight of that little snippet, they probably would have laughed their heads off and I would have pretended it was somebody playing a practical joke on the TV station, and not part of an actual genre.
@mariospants: Fined by who? The FCC has no jurisdiction over cable. On cable tv, networks can show anything they want. Cable tv is like satellite radio.
@Corporate_guy: A cable broadcast of a network station. I guarantee the FCC has jurisdiction over that broadcast.
@Diet-Orange-Soda: Actually, no they do not. The FCC has jurisdiction over the actual broadcast. Not the redistribution of it over cable.
@cortana:
I can’t remember. Who got fined over Jackson’s nipple being exposed during the Superbowl halftime show a few years back? I seem to recall the FCC took action then. This situation is different, but similar.
@mariospants: One time when I was in 8th/9th grade, our local Fox affiliate showed a few seconds of a blow job during The Simpsons. It’s true, we laughed our asses off.
“The Accidental Penis” is one of my favorite Anne Tyler books.
In old country you pay to see penis on tv; in America penis pays to see you…what a country!
I saw it online via my comcast cable modem, can I get $5 too?
But what about the poor guy who exposed himself? I think Comcast should cut (or uncut, as the case may be) him a check as well.
@Trai_Dep: I’m guessing he’s already been paid, quite possibly just by the honor of appearing in pr0n.
5
5 dollar
5 dollar footloooooong
@Fuzzy_duffel_bag: I knew this was coming.
@summerbee: LMAO. I nearly fell out of my chair.
EPIC win for you sir!
@Fuzzy_duffel_bag: That is hilarious. Thread win for you.
@Fuzzy_duffel_bag: I just shot milk out of my nose.
@Fuzzy_duffel_bag: Best response today!
@Fuzzy_duffel_bag: u deserve some sort of award for this. soooo funny
@Fuzzy_duffel_bag:
lmfao.
win
People will be so thrilled at getting $5.00 off their already monopolized high cable bill they will forget all about that penis and not sue! Brilliant!
5 bucks won’t get you any decent diddly squat these days.
Except a *uckin* over by comcast.
Where are the huge fines? They broadcast indecent material, come on FCC!
@moore850:
It was a fleeting dickspletive.
Totally acceptable.
See you guys later. If you need me, I’m heading to the park in my trenchcoat with a pocket full of fivers.
How are customers supposed to know which cable company they have? They think they subscribe to Comcast, but they turn on TV and get Cox.
@TerpBE: haha brilliant
@TerpBE:
Hahaha that was awesome
I’m sure the fine print says if you accept the $5, you waive any right to sue.
This makes me want to switch to Comcast.
oh please people….we’re so sensitive here….lets all relax.
Oh yea, and some insight on how this could happen.
The porn was shown on an analog broadcast of the superbowl. Comcast doesn’t have an analog porn, its all digital. So to get the digital porn onto an analog channel, someone at the head end would have had to decrypt it (probably convert it to analog, hook it up to the analog only matrix switcher, and flip the feed.
TUCSON, not Tuscon. Spell it right!
Yeah, it looks like whoever was watching the monitors wasn’t paying attention and hit the wrong feed. According to the guy who grabs our sat feeds, the way the image froze before the porn played is indicative of someone switching the feeds.
On a somewhat-random note, this incident prompted our managing editor to announce that we are not allowed to watch porn while at work. Why we would, I don’t know — it’s a newsroom, so everyone knows everything.
Gives new meaning to $5 footlong.
As said before – for the love of god it’s Tucson. Not Tuscon.
Sooo, can I sign up to have Comcast interrupt my service with random outbursts of porn, and receive a $5 rebate per incident? That would be great! Maybe a certain adult content channel could provide sponsorship. I smell an emerging business model here.
It would also make for great conversation, “Can anyone tell me what happened in ‘Heroes’ last night? I got interrupted by porn again.”
Damn, I knew there was a reason I should have watched the Superbowl!
Paid to watch porn? Yes sir. I’ve watched it about 10 times so far, so that’s $50. Woohoo!
We are appalled by last evening’s Super Bowl interruption. The Super Bowl is a family-viewing event, and we are mortified by what occurred.
We can’t undo what happened, but we remain deeply sorry for the impact this situation has had on our customers. To that end, we will be issuing a $10 credit to any Comcast video customer in Tucson who was impacted. While this credit won’t change what happened, we hope that it will demonstrate to our customers, and to the Tucson community, how seriously we are taking this situation. To get this credit, impacted customers should call 888-315-8219.
We are continuing with our investigation into what we believe may have been an isolated, malicious act, and will aggressively pursue all leads until we come to resolution.
@comcastcares: Honestly, I think the only way you can correct this kind of screw up is to just give away this month’s cable for free to all Tucson customers. I’m sure you guys are getting pounded (pun intended) by your customers in that area.
so..how are they going to charge the perverts but refund the moralists?
hahaha that was great
I thought this was a commercial for the new FOX reality show “Flogging Molly”
Cum on comcast thats just reDICKulous….$5. if I’m getting paid to watch porn i should atleast get Minimum wage…and some lube
“Impacted customers should call…”? How will they measure the validity of a claim of “impaction”?
Comcast might just as well give every account in the affected Tucson area a $10 credit and be done with it. Save their customer service reps the extra time and effort.