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Microsoft Attempts To Kill Music Forever With Songsmith Commercial

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My ears are shooting streams of blood
As I watch this demo play
But thanks to Songsmith's magic touch
I'll write like Bruce Springsteen

You don't have to rhyme when you're using Songsmith. The demo showed me.

(Thanks to suryasnair!)

This is a test using rich text formatting and html links. It's the generic "company" ad that should appear on all posts with the Company category if they don't have an ad attached to a specific company.

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81
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And here's David Lee Roth put through Songsmith:
[music.metafilter.com]

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Songsmith doesn't just make music. It makes music HORRIBLE!!!

I like how this guy isn't bothered at all when 2 people start staring at his laptop to see what he's doing...

My response would be more like, "how about you get out of my business before I hit you?"

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I feel like the beginning of this demo was autobiographical.

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HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

"Microsoft huh? So it's pretty easy to use?"

HAHAHAHAHHA

Like... Winbloze?

Well, back to recording in Logic.

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Songsmith on a mac book pro. Nice!

It's poor attempt to take on garageband I guess? Extra poor as it costs $30.

Oh yeah, and horrible music.

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To be fair most of the people in this 'ad' are Microsoft employees who developed the thing and they produced this thing on a lark, which explains the unnatural Bible Summer Camp Counselor exuberance for everything in sight.

On the other hand I'm firmly in the camp of people who have an unrelenting hatred for girls that age singing anything ever.

(Disclaimer: I couldn't make it more than half way through this video.)

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@se7a7n7:

See the first comment. I was going to post it, but Chris beat me to it. This alone validates the existence of Songsmith.

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This ad seems like something that would be used to torture prisoners.

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C'mon Chris. Weren't you paying attention? It should go something like this (sing along):


"My ears are shooting streams of blood

As I watch this demo play


But thanks to Songsmith's magic touch

I sound like Marvin Gaye"

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Everyone, you are seeing the new tool that will be exclusively used in the "reeducation camps" of the next despotic regime.

Now, if I just had someway to put that into song...

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@Franklin Comes Alive!: Your user ID and pic just connected with me HILARIOUS!!!

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@Doug81:

good call on MacBook!

FWIW, i couldn't make it past 30 seconds of this vid.

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Yeah, I second that. Microsoft needs to find a new ad company, FAST!

Where's Don Draper when you need him?

That commercial was hard to watch with it's sickly sweet and corny appeal.

I think if I tried to use that song in a presentation to my boss, I'd be laughed at or fired.

Bye.

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It looks like a commercial for FRIENDS with new cast members.

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@Myself:


Nevermind. I was the one not paying attention.


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Let's not be to harsh, all the people in that commercial are people who work at Microsoft research, plus Songsmith is the most hilarious thing to come out of Microsoft in a long time.

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@Valhawk: Also arguable this ad has been a huge success since it's become a viral hit.

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Seems like it might work okay for modern country or Top-40 pop. Most other stuff is a little more complex, on average. Just like you can't use refrigerator magnets to write Shakespeare.

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I love the description on the website:

"What if I do know how to write music?
Songsmith is for you too. Songwriters can use Songsmith as an "intelligent scratchpad" to work with new melodies, quickly turning your scratch recordings of new ideas into richer, deeper explorations."

Just like the way my old Casio used to.

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Just think of this thing as your own personal Wesley Willis simulator. Sweet.

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I'm buying a Macbook...and not having kids...thanks Microsoft!

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@Franklin Comes Alive!: I got a Muppet over the holiday, and I've been using ProductionTrax songs to accompany his awful lyrics. Now I will go 100% Songsmith 100% of the time. (I am telling you because of your avatar.)

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My favorite part is when the bitchy Asian boss lays a smack-down on Chip for bullshitting about demographics.

Cut that SHIT OUT! She wants to hear Miles sing while having an epileptic seizure.

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That video made me want to install Linux... or hurl. Mostly the second.

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I think Songsmith could pass as a neat toy if it were free. Everything sounds like it's played on an old keyboard though. It's a neat idea but it just doesn't seem to be a finished product that should be selling for $30. Or they may just have a different market segment in mind.

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@Smashville: Are you going to put cool stickers on it like the guy in the ad?

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Someone should run Steve Ballmer's crazy yelling in those old windows commercials through songsmith and see what comes up?

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Meanwhile, the YouTubers are sending the vocals of classic hit songs through Songsmith to see what it comes up with. Here's one guy doing it, so far he's done "Wonderwall," "Long Train Runnin'" and "What's Going On." The results are both hilarious and awful.

[www.youtube.com]

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@Doug81: I'm glad I'm not the only one who noticed that. Brilliant.

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@Franklin Comes Alive!: Perfect.


Rock over London. Rock on Chicago. Songsmith: It Helps You Rock

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That music's giving me flashbacks to malls of the 1970's where there was an electric organ store around every turn. And my step-dad would sing and play like the attention starved, whore monger he was.

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nothing, NOTHING, will ever match the pure majesty of this:

[blog.wired.com]

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@Valhawk: Well, if by "huge success" you mean "makes me want to kick a puppy" then yeah, I guess that would be a successful ad.

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Ah, to hell with songsmith - I wanna know how I can get some glow in the dark towels! That shit's the BOMB!

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I just punched myself in the face. Someone make Songsmith sing a song about MSFT's falling stock price.

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@GuinevereRucker: Yeah, that line caught my attention too. Glad I read the comments before posting. :D

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I like how he's using a MacBook Pro with girly stickers on it.

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@Chris Walters:

My vocal self esteem just went from "bashful" to "Gordon Gecko" after listening to that clip.

hooooayayaaaayahhhhhhhhh!

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If anyone wants to hear it, I'll going to be walking down the street in Chicago later today singing about how my towels rock!

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Cripes, this makes Philip Glass sound good.

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@Franklin Comes Alive!: Well, that's convenient, as the link where David Lee Roth's vocals were run through it makes me want to headbutt people...

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If you go to the songsmith forums it is clear from the developers that the cheesiness was deliberate and they wanted exactly this response in the blogworld, 100 x more publicity for their software!

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"Just think of this thing as your own personal Wesley Willis simulator."


Can you imagine is Wesley has access to this thing? Now that would make it worthwhile.


There's only one thing to say to this...
Rock 'n Roll McDonalds!



+ Watch video



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@Parapraxis: I was crying with laughter. This is so comically awful. Thank you!

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@Ookseer:
Finally!!! Everyone thinks I'm horrible when I say the worst sound ever is the sound of children singing!

Okay, I am horrible, but at least I'm not the only one.

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@JGKojak:
I'm glad I read through the comments, Wesley Willis was my first thought when I saw this!

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@homerjay wants Boston Legal back!: I'm kind of working off the "there is no such thing as bad publicity" model.

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@Chris Walters: Many years back, I saw Van Halen live. This actually sounded better than DLR did in concert...

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@GuinevereRucker: That one had me rolling, too!

Now Starbucks is going to be intolerable with Guitar-Hero musician wannabes that can not only "play" the guitar, but think they can sing and write music, too.