I officially nominate the greatest commercial from the 80s: Nestle White chocolate bar. To my prepubescent mind, this commercial had everything: breathy vocals, unctuous synths, the subversive idea that chocolate could actually be white (imagine my disappointment when I realize it was merely artificial cocoa butter solids). To this day, not a month goes by that “Sweet dreams are made of thi-i-s, N-E-S-T-L-E-S” doesn’t go through my head. Now that’s an earworm. I realize I’m praising this commercial more than making fun of it, but this feature IS “Greatest Moments” in commercial history. They don’t have to be all bad, do they?
No, they don’t all have to be bad — however this one qualifies. Enjoy.
Commenter grahams points out that Faith No More covered this jingle in concert. So awesome.
If you’d like to nominate a commercial for our weekly series “Great Moments In Commercial History” send us an email at tips [at] consumerist [dot] com. Be sure to put “Great Moments In Commercial History” in the subject. To see other commercials that have been featured in the series, click here.
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Oh wow. Even without sound this looks bad.
I remember this, LOL! I used to eat this stuff all the time. Now I don’t think I could.
I can do what the skater is doing (a layback spin).
@HogwartsAlum: I also remember this commercial. I still like white chocolate.
@HogwartsAlum: I forgot about this commercial. I’m with the submitter; when I was a kid this was a bad ass commercial. Now it seems as if it was dug out of a time capsule.
@cuchanu: I know, right? I remember thinking this was pretty awesome around… sixth grade, maybe? Now it sounds like it was written by a poor man’s Jan Hammer.
And the chick with the Cleopatra-do in the white hood? Hhhhhhhawt.
You really should be showing the UK Milky bar kid adverts. Ah Nestles pronounced ness-ules, what memories.
@sir_eccles: The absolutely weirdest commercial was the Kinder Egg commercial from back in the 1980s
@sir_eccles:
That would make sense if the Milky Bar kid was part of every American child’s experience. But they aren’t.
This time, I think the Milky Bars are on you …
Wow, I remember these. At the time when they aired I couldn’t figure out why my parents laughed and snickered when they came on the TV; I thought the visuals were so cool!
I used to love those. Now that damn song is stuck in my head.
That’s going to be tattooed on my brain all day…
Classic. Shit was good.
That is 30 seconds of pure, concentrate awesome. I hurt from the power of its awesome.
@valarmorghulis: Exactly! I don’t know what all of these haters are talking about.
I think it might be the first time I heard a song in a commercial and wanted to buy the song. (The Master Fabricators ad doesn’t count since I understood it was just a jingle.)
It’s catchy. I remember this jingle popping up in my head from time to time…
“Dreamyyyy whiiiiiiiiiite, Creeeemyyyy whiiiiiiite! Nestle makes the very best, En Ee Es Tee Ele Ee Es!”
It was cool back then…
That was a great commercial.
Here’s another one that’s stuck in my head…
Crispy Critters Cereal
@se7a7n7: THANK YOU! Like no one I know remembers this commercial!
@se7a7n7: Now this commercial could never be aired do to it’s insensitivity towards people with speech impediments. Shame.
@Starscream_GitEmSteveDave: I don’t think anyone in this commercial has a speech impediment…the girl just can’t pronounce the word. I think you are reaching there.
This commercial also reminded me that one of my high school teachers used to call the kids that smoked pot “crispy critters” and yes, he got it from this cereal.
@se7a7n7: INDUBITABLY! This commercial taught me a new word. I even remember looking it up at the time to learn what it meant.
@se7a7n7: Oh. my. god. I STILL sing that song. My mom would never buy me the cereal. Thanks for the flashback!
I can’t believe I used to like that commercial. I wonder what crap I am watching today that I will deny a few years from now. By the way, where can I get a set of the white pants and shirt so the next time the wife and I do the role-playing thing….oh wait…I didn’t say that.
Dear God, I’d nearly forgotten about this, and now it’ll be stuck in my head. What bizarre is how un-bizarre we used to find these spots.
@plutonyum: I remember that commercial and I never thought a thing about it at the time. Now it looks so stupid! I can’t believe I didn’t laugh at it back then. How funny we are that we don’t tend to notice things like that until later. I also didn’t realize it was that long ago. Wow.
ANYESTEAELEEEHS
Please note that this was not actually labeled “chocolate”–it didn’t legally meet the required standard. It’s simply a mystical substance known as “Alpine White.” Which sounds to me like a quaint little narcotic.
@floraposte: Me and my girl did some alpine white just last night as a matter of fact.
Faith No More used to cover this jingle live in concert… You can find videos of this on Youtube…
@grahams: Damn, you beat me to it.
@grahams: I spent many lunch times hungry due to my love for faith no more. Who needs lunch? New *tape* comming out next week.
@grahams: amazing
@grahams: Mike Patton is one crazy genius.
The first scene is a total rip-off of Maxfield Parish. I still like the commercial, though.
correction: Parrish. Here’s the painting.
[i.grab.com]
And here is the original Parrish they used for the ending shot: [americanart.si.edu]
@Amelie: I figured the shot was inspired by cover of the the Moody Blues’ album The Present. But clearly the cover was inspired by the painting.
That stuff was DELICIOUS. I don’t think they make it anymore. I used to buy that white chocolate almond thing all the time.
I think that guy in the Nestle commercial sold me my used car.
Yes. I remember this commercial. God I miss the ’80s.
White chocolate may not be real chocolate but it’s superior to the dark stuff in every way.
Chocolate snobs be damned. Eat sweet, not bitter!
This commercial ran together in my mind with Heart’s “These Dreams”.
@Hongfiately: Hah, that happened to me too!
That was my favorite candy bar of all time. Every once in a while I think about it and sigh tragically.
earworms. I’ve casually wondered if there was a term for this. Now I know.
My God. It’s the original rickroll.
OMGz now I have to watch Friday Night Videos!
mike patton rules.
Looks like i’m not the only person to remember that damn commercial. Bring back Cookies and Mint, Nestle!
Anyone else remember the Cadbury Flake ads from the 80s? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=paCqMYkSVIU for example.
AWESOME! more great old crappy commercials please!
Ok, seriously. I get that the commercial is terrible, but did you really just call Nestle White Chocolate awful? I stopped reading after that, as this article clearly has no merit.
Wow, I completely forgot about that commercial, until now.
Does anyone find that Nestle chocolate is too sweet for them now?
mmm mmmm Creamy white *puts finger on lower lip*
I loved that romantic Nestle commerical!
Two other commericals that I can sing pretty much from start to finish:
It’s got that great Pepsi Taste
Diet Pepsi Won’t go to your waist
Yes Diet Pepsi, One small calorie
Now you see it; now you don’t
And the Tombstone Pizza
It’s a small-town, home-grown
made-the-way-you-make-your-own pizza!
Tombstone!
Made the way you make your very own!
Also the Hi-Pro dog commercial
I got a dog his name is Bo
And he’s got the high-pro glow!
Healthy high-pro glow!
Energy the high-pro glow!
@Maulleigh: I can make a beef fondue,
40 kinds of chicken stew,
That’s because I am a very good gourmet,
But I cannot make one dish,
Which is Arthur Treacher’s fish,
So I buy it and I eat it anywaaaaaaay!
It’s Arthur Treacher’s Fish and Chips,
The meal you cannot make
The meal you cannot make
The meal you cannot make at hoooooome!
I ate so much of this stuff when I was a kid that I once got sick off it. Now the smell of “white choclate” gags me. Kind of like the smell of Southern Comfort for the very same reason, but that’s a different story….
I wanna fuck that chocolate so bad!
Great commercial and great confection.
I miss those ‘concept’ adverts from the ’80s. This one is so great because it just stops this short of being a Calvin Klein perfume ad.
The Director’s name is Bob Porsche. This was a great spot and really shows the detail the ultimatte was capable of. I’ve had the pleasure of working with him as an editor and not only is he talented, but he’s a really nice guy. One year, to thank me for all the work I put into his reels he gave me some of the most beautiful wind chimes. Great director!
This ad was very nearly a spiritual experience for me as a child. I had a VHS tape of something (taped off of a Disney Channel weekend preview, probably) that had about 3/4 of this ad (at very the beginning, so the rainbow strip still ran down the side of the screen), and I TREASURED it. I would honestly – when no one was looking – play the tape just to see the ad. And once, full of pride at my technical savvy, I took my tape deck and pressed it up against the speaker on the TV to record my 3/4 of this song to an audio tape.
I could never thank you enough, Consumerist, for bringing this ad back to me. [wipes tear from eye]
Sweet! I’m the one who suggested this. I’m happy to bring the memories back to the masses.
@bilups:
I never saw this one, but in Europe this was called Alpine White, and the jingle was sung by Sophie B. Hawkins.
Mind-blowing starts now:
+ Watch video
I saw Faith No More open for Billy Idol in ’90 or ’91 on the ‘Charmed Life’ tour. The lead singer sat on a huge amp with his legs crossed and a single white spotlight on him. He sang this song as if he was laying down the most important vocals ever heard. Like he was singing ‘Amazing Grace’ at a head of state’s funeral. It was so purposely over the top, and one of the greatest concert moments of my life.