Fired? Suck Up To Your Enemies

Here’s a cheeky guide for sorta-lazy people to survive being laid-off. Number one: Kiss the ass of ex-coworkers you hate.

Your former boss took credit for all the work you did and then got you canned to save her own ass. The intern who’s resume you pulled from the slush pile was promoted the day you packed your boxes. And the owner of the company continues to rake in millions while you’re now forced to subsist on cans of beans you’re too sad to heat up before eating. But while you might want to send off emails telling these people what kinds of unspeakable acts they should be subjected to, resist that urge. Instead, swallow what small amount of pride you have left and send them polite emails telling them how much of a pleasure it was to work with them. You never know when they’ll be hiring again, after all.

– or when their friends will. You can also send the same email to people you enjoyed working with, too, works just as well, if not better. But maximize your chances by not neglecting even those you found loathsome.

7 Essential Steps to Surviving a Post-Layoff Existence [FastCompany]