A Japanese sake house near Tokyo has stolen one of my ideas and employed monkeys as waiters—one brings hot towels to customers when they sit down, and another takes orders and delivers bottles of sake. They’re tipped in edamame, which U.S. waitstaff should seriously consider since you don’t have to report it, and since the dollar will soon be worth about the same anyway. Our favorite quote from the article: “‘The monkeys are actually better waiters than some really bad human ones,’ customer Takayoshi Soeno said.” Hold on to your hats, there’s video footage below!
The owner kept the monkeys as pets, but saw one of them copying him one day, so he handed him a hot towel and watched him bring it to a customer. Now he’s deliberately training three more, which actually concerns us a little. Two monkeys is hilarious, but put five monkey waiters together and you’re risking a monkey union, which we imagine won’t be quite so enjoyable—imagine Sally Field throwing her poo at the other factory workers instead of scribbling on cardboard.