March Madness-Style Bracket Makes Bank Mergers Fun

TechCrunch has posted this “March Madness” style bracket of the recent financial meltdown. It was reportedly created by a general partner at Sansome Partners named Mark Slavonia, says TC.

We love it. It’s like the Worst Company In America Contest, but for real.

September Madness [TechCrunch](Thanks, Fuzz!)

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  1. Rippleeffect says:

    My money is on JP Morgan ad BoA for the final. With Obama taking McCain, but getting swallowed by a bank on the way.

    • ZukeZuke says:

      @Rippleeffect: I’ll second that! These old money banks have the staying power to weather the storm. Sure, they’re rates suck for investors, but they don’t need good rates to attract customers…

      Would love to see BofA vs. Queen of England at the final though – score one for nationalism!

    • ClickClickThud says:

      @Rippleeffect: These brackets are fubar. Obama has been a wholly-owned subsidiary of Fannie Mae since 2004.

  2. Terrifying.

    Funny, but in a gallows humor way.

    I say the championship will be Barack Obama vs. Bank of America.

    FIGHT!

  3. LetMeGetTheManager says:

    I am winning in my office pool already! Although no idea who Barklay’s is…

  4. youknowwhoibee says:

    I understand peopled predictions to have Chase and BoA in the finals… but I have had some very positive experiences with both companies. My auto loan is through chase, and one of my 2 credit cards is from chase. They have provided a stable interest rate, and been very reasonable with customer service. My school loan is through BoA, and my second card is from there. I actually received decreased interest rates for my fixed rate accounts, and I am contemplating switching banks to them, to have the convenience of banking in any state.

    I understand horror stories, but I have nothing but good things to say about them.

  5. I'm a tweeple too! says:

    It would be funny if not terrifyingly true.

    No matter how this ends, BofA aka Banque du Mephostophilis will take on any comers and screw them without a smile or a mint on the pillow.

  6. Dadu says:

    This would be funny…if it wasn’t so depressing

  7. humphrmi says:

    I’m betting my money on The Queen of England.

  8. ElijahDProphet says:

    I think Wells Fargo has more staying power then the bracket gives them credit for (up against the FED in round 2).

  9. goodkitty says:

    The chart makes it even more frightening. With only a few huge behemoths left, how can we expect them to do the right thing? Since when did a megacorp (or megabank, in this case) EVER actually improve service and efficiency over smaller competitors? This is a set-up for even more bank failures, ones that at multiple hundreds of billion dollars will rattle economies of the future even more.

    How is this not becoming even more of an epic fail?

    • magic1 says:

      @goodkitty: No kidding!! They want us to bail out the banks that have gotten “too big to fail” and then they are letting the remaining ones get BIGGER? WTF?

  10. Sean Salisbury Steak says:

    Don’t count out Gonzaga. Always sleepers…

    Oh, right.

  11. jantonbusch says:

    (It’s Barclays.)

  12. superflippy says:

    I can’t wait to see Barack Obama taking on the Queen of England in the Final Four.

  13. Rectilinear Propagation says:

    We love it. It’s like the Worst Company In America Contest, but for real.

    Please tell me that whoever wins will get a Golden Turd award.

  14. Rectilinear Propagation says:

    Also, someone needs to get this chart in the hands of both of the candidates, preferably while they’re on TV. I’d pay cold, hard cash to see their reaction to it.

  15. Chols says:

    HAHAHA this is the funniest thing I’ve seen on Consumerist in a while!

  16. stang says:

    Queen of England vs Fed Reserve in the Finals…. With The Queen of England winning and we all go back under British rule!

  17. stang says:

    The Queen and The Fed in the final….

    The Queen for the win….

    We go back under British rule…

    FAIL!

  18. selianth says:

    I really can’t figure out whether I’m supposed to laugh or cry.

  19. Burgandy says:

    Serious question for those in the know. Is this the time to start disputing items on your credit report with any of the banks getting aquired? Will the chaos impact the turn around time in responding to disputes? *crosses fingers*

  20. u1itn0w2day says:

    Meltdown,merge,get absorbed and get too big to fail all over again.

    Nobody seems to be talking anti-trust.oh I get it.When the government wants anti competitive practices it’s OK.

  21. JoeWaiver says:

    not right: the US Congress is up against the Federal Reserve right now.