Golden Poo Award For Worst Company In America Unveiled

The box we teased you about contained a glistening golden poo statue. That’s right, the award for Worst Company In America is here. That can mean only one thing… On Monday we host our final deathmatch between Comcast and Countrywide Home Loans. It’s going to be a brutal bloodbath full of chills and spills. Only one will walk away champion, and then we will mail them their justly deserved prize. Stay tuned to Consumerist.com for all the hot crappy-company-on-crappy-company action.

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  1. MercuryPDX says:

    Impressed you got your cat to not only pose, but “roar” on cue.

  2. Saboth says:

    I have my Mortgage with Countrywide and Cable with Comcast (only carrier in town). No matter who wins, I lose.

  3. chiieddy says:

    I’m still astounded that Countrywide trumped Diebold.

  4. chiieddy says:

    @chiieddy: Err Comcast.

  5. Nick1693 says:

    Can someone tell me where one might obtain a golden poo?

  6. snoop-blog says:

    Why do we have to mail it to them? Why can’t we just put it in a bag on their door step, light it, then run?

  7. @snoop-blog: Actually, I was envisioning a press conference around the presentation of the award at the company’s doorstep. But I think the lighting the bag and running would even add to the fun of a press conference.

  8. snoop-blog says:

    @Nick1693: My backyard, tomorrow morning. /runs off to the hardware store…

  9. ConsumptionJunkie says:

    In Japan, the word for poo is “unko,” which means lucky kid: [www.strapya-world.com]

  10. Bladefist says:

    I’m glad diebold didn’t make it. Now I can take this seriously. I think by now we all know Countrywide, and what they have done to our economy, it makes me barely even remember comcast.

    You guys need to photoshop the countrywide execs holding up their golden poo (I’m fairly confident they will win)

  11. danman81 says:

    “THANK GOD WE’RE A MONOPOLY!”

  12. RhymePhile says:

    Are the photos dark because we must wait for the true Unveiling of the Poo; are they dark because that makes it more tantalizing; or are they dark because the kitteh stole the flash off the camera?

  13. That is the most fitting…. statuette… for this contest!

  14. Underpants Gnome says:

    @Nick1693: Easy, just grab a turd and start polishing.

  15. Franklin Comes Alive! says:

    Comcast sucks, has always sucked, and will suck forever. But they have never managed to be a stain on the entire US economy. Countrywide should win the golden poo, and also be awarded some sort of lifetime achievement trophy as well. Maybe some platinum diarrhea?

  16. @Bladefist:

    I’m glad diebold didn’t make it. Now I can take this seriously. I think by now we all know Countrywide, and what they have done to our economy, it makes me barely even remember comcast.

    Diebold most certainly was qualified to be in the Final Four – the potential for massive voting fraud and reliability problems with their voting machines is a big deal. Diebold should be facing off against Countrywide in the “championship”. People voting for Comcast over Diebold says volumes about our country – “I got screwed on my cable bill once” is less important than the potential loss of integrity of our VOTING SYSTEM.

    I would vote for Countrywide over Diebold, though. Severely damaging the US economy is more of a current issu than the potentiality of the Diebold issue.

    If Countrywide doesn’t beat Comcast by a 80/20 ratio, I’m going to give up on people :)

  17. Franklin Comes Alive! says:

    @InfiniTrent:

    Cue Bladefist’s right-wing response in 3… 2…

  18. B says:

    @InfiniTrent: Actual loss is worse than potential loss.

  19. Roxie says:

    @Nick1693: I’ve seen golden poo cell phone charms at jbox.com. And I just found out that ThinkGeek also sells them:

    [www.thinkgeek.com]

    And I just stumbled on this–it’s a pretty interesting article: [www.asian-central.com]

  20. Franklin Comes Alive! says:

    @B:

    In attempt to not turn this thread political (though it may already be too late), I won’t stake a claim on whether or not we have already experienced voter fraud due to Diebold & Co or not. But I’d say that even the potential for massive voting fraud is far worse than the reality of getting screwed on a cable bill.

  21. InThrees says:

    @InfiniTrent:

    Bread and circuses, ever hear of them?

  22. Franklin Comes Alive! says:

    @Franklin Comes Alive!:

    Also, I award myself a miniature golden poo charm for the grammatical butchery of the first sentence in my last post.

  23. wgrune says:

    @Bladefist:

    That creepily-tan ex-exec from Countrywide already is a “golden poo” (it’s a tanning joke, HA!).

  24. Bladefist says:

    @InfiniTrent: I’ve heard this argument every single time Diebold was up for vote.

    The fact that people voted for comcast does say something about this country: not everybody wears tinfoil hats and reads thedailykos.com.

    In a previous debate with other commenters, I conceded that it was possible for diebold to manipulate votes. However, are you to say it’s not possible to manipulate paper votes? In every election there is voter fraud. Every. There has been no proven voter fraud using the Diebold system.

    Let’s be honest, if John Kerry won, Diebold would have never been in the list of companies up for this “award.” This is purely based on politics, and it’s cheap shots. He won. Okay?

  25. Nick1693 says:

    @Franklin Comes Alive!: Platinum? Uhoh…

    (Thanks to all who told me where I could get a golden poo…)

  26. mariospants says:

    Ironically, Countrywide isn’t winning this award for lack of customer service, or poor customer service or even a bad product per se (I’m sure when those customers got initially got the keys to their mcmansions they were quite happy). Nope. they’re winning it because they fucked everyone over in the end. Next year, can we please vote in Walmart or KFC or some company that’s been reaming people slowly for years?

  27. Bladefist says:

    @Franklin Comes Alive!: Thank you for the introduction. I don’t see how that comment was within the new comment rules.

    But I’d say that even the potential for massive voting fraud is far worse than the reality of getting screwed on a cable bill.

    True. But the contest is not, “Which company can hurt us the most.” Voter fraud is bad, but potentially, Meat corporations could pack antrax in our meat to kill us all. So do we vote for them instead? The contest is for the Worst Company in America. Based on Customer Service, rip off reports, going against the consitution, etc. For things we know and read about daily on the site.

  28. Franklin Comes Alive! says:

    @Bladefist:

    For the record, I was attempting to make the comment in a humorous fashion, sorry if it didn’t come off that way.

    Also, regardless of any argument for/against Diebold, Countrywide deserves this award by a country mile.

  29. Bladefist says:

    @Franklin Comes Alive!: Fair enough. Sorry, I didn’t recognize the humor. I’m attacked so often for having an opposing view, it’s hard to recognize who is just joshin me.

  30. dadelus says:

    @Bladefist,

    I will concede that fraud has never been proven, but the stink is heavlily in the air. Here are a couple of points to ponder.

    Diebold can make a secure ATM network that allows for a papertrail for every transaction but they can’t figure out how to do the same for voting machines?

    They have programmers who can write secure code for said ATMs but when it comes to their voting machines they opted for an unsecured MS Access database as the background “software”?

    Again, I realize this isn’t a smoking gun, but having the CEO of the company making the voting machines come out publicaly and state that he will do “everything in his power” to ensure Bush won Ohio should at the very least make people take a look at what that statement means.

    I could go on and on but I will spare everyone the post.

    Thanks!

  31. Franklin Comes Alive! says:

    @Bladefist:

    I rarely agree with you, but you’ve got every right to post what you think. And I appreciate that your arguments are usually well-thought out and civil, though the responses to them often aren’t.

  32. A.W.E.S.O.M.-O says:

    @Bladefist: Thank you, finally someone says it. I’m so damn tired of hearing “oh, but this company can kill us all, that’s more important than cable.” With that logic it should be nothing but health insurance companies and the country of China filling out the entire bracket.

  33. chenry says:

    Go Countrywide!

    As in “go away”.

  34. snoop-blog says:

    Can we get back to talking about shit, I mean poo?

    btw, That looks more like a golden ice cream than a golden shit. Consumerist, if I would have known you were in the market for a shit, I could have hooked you up. Where I work at, I sell shit all day long!!!

  35. axiomatic says:

    In my heart I want Comcast to win but the reality is that Countrywide is the scum of the earth.

  36. @Franklin Comes Alive!:

    Cue Bladefist’s right-wing response in 3… 2…

    Don’t worry, I’m a right-winger too. ;)

  37. ConsumptionJunkie says:

    I’m curious how much the golden poo cost. Shipping and handling?

  38. kittenfoo says:

    You know, I think it’s an insult to golden poo everywhere to be associated with the likes of Comcast and Countrywide. Just sayin’.

  39. @Bladefist:
    In a previous debate with other commenters, I conceded that it was possible for diebold to manipulate votes. However, are you to say it’s not possible to manipulate paper votes? In every election there is voter fraud. Every. There has been no proven voter fraud using the Diebold system.
    I watched Pres. Roslin steal the election in Battlestar Galactica, via faked paper ballots, so I know it can be done!

    In a hundred years, we’ll watching videos from Florida in 2000, laughing at ourselves. What a joke! In this day and age, grown men and women gawking at “chads”, making judgment calls on the intent of a voter based on their “chad’s” pregnancy, or hanging. Regardless of who won, that was a joke. There’s no excuse for punch cards in a world where we can do this electronically.

    Like paper, though electronic voting has its own challenges, and the foremost is security. One problem is that electronic voting is easy to manipulate while leaving no trace. We have reason to believe Diebold’s system could be easily manipulated – that’s why I made my comments. It has nothing to do with any particular election or political slant. They built a weak lock for the most important system in America.

    Let’s be honest, if John Kerry won, Diebold would have never been in the list of companies up for this “award.” This is purely based on politics, and it’s cheap shots. He won. Okay?

    It’s possible, but this is SO not what my comment was about. I voted for Bush, and would again, given Kerry as an alternative (whoops…why did I just say that here?).

    I guess I didn’t realize that much of the Diebold blow-up was politically motivated. I thought it was more of a bipartisan issue that both sides agreed needed work.

    I still think the realistic possibility of massive vote fraud outweighs Comcast’s deceptive marketing practices, horrendous customer service, and mis-billing. But that’s why we vote, right?

    Erm…Consumerist – Diebold doesn’t serve your voting engine, does it?

  40. @Bladefist:

    True. But the contest is not, “Which company can hurt us the most.”

    This is a good point. But we’re not talking about tin foil hat conspiracy theories, but realistic possibility.

    Voter fraud is bad, but potentially, Meat corporations could pack anthrax in our meat to kill us all. So do we vote for them instead? The contest is for the Worst Company in America. Based on Customer Service, rip off reports, going against the constitution, etc. For things we know and read about daily on the site.

    I’m not personally aware of any meat companies that have failed to protect their food quality so badly that Anthrax could make its way into my beef. I am aware of a voting machine company that made an insecure method of recording and reporting votes.

    Heck, if we’re voting for “most potentially dangerous”, I’d pick the Sun – that thing could kick our butts in a serious way.

    Nothing has been substantiated in terms of Diebold and voting fraud, and truly I don’t think anything has happened. But as I said earlier, they designed one heck of a crappy lock for a very precious cargo, and left the door open. That’s serious neglect, and considering the magnitude of impact that mistake can have, that makes it more important than a cable company to me. But again, that’s just me!

  41. humphrmi says:

    You guys all just go ahead and keep wasting your breath debating the politics of Diebold vs. Comcast. I’m voting for Countrywide. Screw my 401(k), get a golden poo.

  42. dadelus says:

    Semi-Random comment:

    And all this time I’ve been told you couldn’t polish a turd.

    :)

  43. Rectilinear Propagation says:

    …I got screwed on my cable bill once…

    @InfiniTrent: Once? I don’t think any of the Comcast stories here are about them messing up once on a bill. Whatever you think about Diebold losing to Comcast let’s not pretend that Comcast is only slightly bad at what they do.

  44. Rectilinear Propagation says:

    Was I hallucinating or was the poll for the final two already up at one point?

  45. TechnoDestructo says:

    @chiieddy:

    They’re the only ones who COULD have.

  46. palookapalooza says:

    Let’s be honest, if John Kerry won, Diebold would have never been in the list of companies up for this “award.” This is purely based on politics, and it’s cheap shots. He won. Okay?

    One thing that had people’s panties in a bunch in 2000 was how different the vote tallies were from the exit polling. If I recall correctly, there had not been a previous election where the results were so different. If the tables were turned and Bush had been ahead in the exit polls, but the numbers came back the other way, I still think that lots of people would have raised a stink due to the disparity. Maybe not this forum, but you can’t tell me the Freepers wouldn’t have jumped all over that…

  47. jwinston2 says:

    @dadelus:

    Secure ATMs? I am sorry to point this out but that does not exist.

    [www.technovelgy.com]

    [www.securityfocus.com]

    or according to this guy he sells Diebold ATM skimmers

    [www.globalgoldtalk.com]

    I find it troublesome that Diebold uses Windows as the OS in their ATMs. Really though they have trouble with the ATM’s they make which kinda makes your points moot.

  48. Rectilinear Propagation says:

    @snoop-blog: I imagine whoever they asked to make this for them didn’t have a poo cast. That had to of been an interesting conversation.

  49. Bladefist says:

    @InfiniTrent: Well, paper fraud may be more easily investigated. But you should concede the fraud does happen. We’ve all heard every year, some city has a huge turn out of dead voters.

    When the voter fraud happens in one direction, it’s not covered. When it doesn’t happen in the other direction, it’s conspiratized (is that a word?) as ‘probably’ happening.

    Thats what happens when your news media isn’t fair and balanced like Fox News. ahahahhahahha

  50. anthonyhasp says:

    While I think that Countrywide should win based on the destructive nature of their actions, there is a problem. Countrywide no longer exists, so who will receive the award, the CEO of Bank of America? Also, if the purpose of the award is to shame the company into changing their operations, then why give it to a now defunct company? For these reasons, I will be voting for Comcast.

  51. Bladefist says:

    @palookapalooza: Ya. Well people need to give up on Polls. During the Primaries almost every poll was if not completely wrong, mostly, completely, wrong. A sample of 1000 people is just not going to cut it. As a student of math, I’ve looked up their polling equations and what not, and have determined its manipulated polls. Manipulate the poll data to come out in a certain direction, to hopefully enforce that direction.

    Old news. Been happening for years and years on both sides of the aisle.

  52. stevejust says:

    @Bladefist: This is purely based on politics, and it’s cheap shots. He won. Okay?

    Well, no it’s not okay. It’s not okay that someone who ran a campaign on not being the world’s police force invaded Iraq and is costing us as tax payers billions of dollars, while Osama Bin Laden is laughing at us from wherever he escaped to. Flip flopper that Bush is.

    It’s not okay that someone who ran Arbusto, Spectrum 7 and Harken Energy into the ground also ran this country into the ground. Our economy has never seen less hope.

    It’s not okay that while Bush was on vacation and got a memo that said “Bin Laden Determined to Attack in the US” he kept his regularly scheduled vacation instead of trying to protect us as the commander in chief.

    It’s not okay that the FDIC is about to be bailing out more banks than it can ever hope to afford to take over. Just like the S&L bailout Bush’s daddy oversaw. Coincidence?

    It’s not okay that all of the American car companies are going to go out of business because they couldn’t see $4 gasoline coming. If this administration had been more pro-active all along about CAFE standards and led the car companies, they’d have been better off for it.

    So, under the Bush administration
    1) We were attacked and the administration failed to stop 9/11 from happening.
    2) We’ve seen a bunch of bail outs, ie., SOCIALISM for Bear Sterns and IndyMAC. Look at all the cash infusions the Fed has made to the banks of the past two years.
    3) We’ve spent billions of dollars in Iraq for no reason, no reward, no return on that investment — that’s just money pissed away in the desert
    4) The size of the government has grown, the size of the deficit has grown, the economy has tanked

    So. Either there were 50 million stupid people who voted for the incompent d-bag in 2004, or there was some weird things going on in Ohio and Florida. Either way, we’re screwed.

  53. Bladefist says:

    @stevejust: I acknowledge your comment. But its way to political for this article. We were already on the edge. All I will add is, I’m not a Bushie, I’m just a conservative.

  54. bohemian says:

    Countrywide stinks because getting screwed on your mortgage is worse than getting screwed on your cable bill and the ripple effect of screwing everything else like people’s 401k. Countrywide found a way to not only make life suck for their customers but make life suck for people who don’t even do business with them. They win.

    Comcast is a constant parade of crappy customer service and headaches. I had them for a few months. They still win worst cable provider ever.

    Diebold deserves to be in the running. If I could alter a voting machine with a soda machine key and a usb thumb drive there is something very very wrong. My vote matters to me and I want it counted correctly. So glad we are still on paper ballots in SD. It is much harder to manipulate paper ballots than it is to tweak an Access database.

  55. sahhhm says:

    make sure to ship it in an over-sized box big enough to get their hopes up of another gift from a loyal customer!

  56. coren says:

    @MercuryPDX: I don’t know about roar so much as yawn…

  57. toddiot says:

    I yawned about three times just now thanks to that cat.

  58. coren says:

    @Bladefist: Yknow, I never did buy into that whole 1000 people can give a fair and accurate representation (then again, I also think Neilsen ratings are a crock of not so golden poo).

  59. Go Countrywide!

  60. coren says:

    I’m glad Diebold finally went down. I’ve said it before, Ill say it again

    Who here got bad customer service from them? Where’s the proof you were defrauded? And lastly; you have a choice, exercise it! If Diebold is that shittacular, then don’t use them. I mean, if we’re going to lambaste people for going to Best Buy or Circuit City or Walmart or whoever the whipping boy of the day is…why is it people don’t just vote via mail in ballots? You can drop them off at polling centers so they don’t get lost, and Diebold is out of the equation.

    And that’s as political as I’m getting. I’m sorry to see such worthy competitors get beaten by Diebold, but really, none of them stood a chance against Comcrap.

  61. Benny Gesserit says:

    @MercuryPDX: Or yawn at the banality of the moment. It’s all good.

  62. oregongal says:

    Ok lets do this. Countrywide gets the Golden Turd and Comcast’s runner up prize is a Silver Vomit Splat ;). Both delivered, of course, in over-sized boxes :)

  63. TheLemon says:

    @anthonyhasp: “Countrywide no longer exists, so who will receive the award, the CEO of Bank of America?”

    Sounds like a fine solution! I don’t think you’ll find much resistance to that idea around here.

  64. JackHandey says:

    Maybe next year the Consumerist can have categories like “Most Evil Company,” “Most Incompetent Company,” “Most Corrupt Company,” “Worst For America,” etc. That way companies like Monsanto, Comcast, Halliburton, and Countrywide can all be represented in their own special way. If this poll has shown one thing, it is how many bad companies are out there.

  65. Franklin Comes Alive! says:

    @JackHandey:

    That actually sounds like a good idea. Instead of having these two fighting for the generic ‘worst company’ golden poo, we could have Comcast winning the ‘Golden Van Crashed Into a House’ for ‘Worst Customer Service’ and Countrywide winning the ‘Golden Hobo Sack’ for ‘Most Damage done to a Global Economy’.

  66. trujunglist says:

    Attackers of Bladefist:

    You haven’t said anything that he hasn’t heard a million and a half times. He obviously doesn’t believe the same things that you believe in and probably never will. That is simply the conservative way; very very stubborn. I mean, Bush and Co. can bash Obama a lot for his diplomatic talks policy with hostile countries, reverse position completely like a gigantic flip flopping pancake, and STILL (thanks to propaganda outlets like Fox News and Rush) make Obama look like the bad guy! It’s unbelievable genius at work, like when you were a kid in elementary school playing superhero, and you had a cool power and so did your friends, but there was that one kid that always had to have every power and you couldn’t fake kill him!

  67. atypicalxian says:

    This is a tough call — Countrywide was key in the mortgage mess and helping our economy tank; Comcast inflicts much misery with its customer service abominations and price gouging via local monopolies around the country. I’m going to have to mull this one over before voting.

  68. VikingP77 says:

    No one had to choose Countrywide for a loan. And especially people with poor money skills. So I must go with Comcast. Most people don’t have a choice for service. At least I don’t. And in the USA we deserve better than that. Com-crap-stic FTW!

  69. floraposte says:

    Actually, Countrywide acquired a considerable number of its loans by buying them from other lenders, so plenty of its customers didn’t choose it either.

  70. @VikingP77: Sure they did. You see, they “had” to have a house. Countrywide was the only one who would give them a loan. Volià! They had to choose Countrywide.

    Maybe that’s not how it worked, but who cares? This is the internet. If enough people believe me, then it must be true.

  71. tgrwillki says:

    as a former (additional emphasis on former so I can avoid any misdirected projection of rage) employee of comcast, let me say a better company couldn’t win it. The Real way they win is that they keep you in your “you have everything” package after you leave the company with a freeze on the account (it’s listed as an employee account) so you get billed for it for almost a month after you seperate.

    Thank god I left HQ for Grad school.

  72. @Roxie: you people are lightweights. Send them REAL dog crap, purchased at dog-doo.com (though they seem to imply that they sell fake poop, which makes the whole exercise stupid and lame).

  73. VikingP77 says:

    @Michael Belisle: Touche’ ;-)

  74. Sudonum says:

    @VikingP77:
    Thats not true. I had a loan through someone else. Countrywide bought it. I had no choice in the matter. Thank God I sold the property shortly thereafter.

  75. covaro says:

    I’m voting for Countrywide if no other reason than the amazing service I got recently from Comcast… yes I did actually just say that:

    [www.foundationstech.com]

    That tin of popcorn is $35!!!

  76. TouchMyMonkey says:

    @trujunglist: Kinda like Bizarro Superman, right? Good is bad, up is down, hot is cold, that sort of thing? I’ll never figure out for the life of me how people can piss and moan about the police not doing their jobs when they get mugged, yet insist that government has no business regulating the finance and banking industries (other than that little thing in the Constitution (Article I, Section 8) that says it’s their fracking job, f’rchrissakes).

  77. mthrndr says:

    countrywide with a bullet.

  78. lightaugust says:

    @A.W.E.S.O.M.-O: Whoa, whoa, whoa… China was eligible?

  79. lightaugust says:

    @trujunglist: Agreed, but there was always the day when everyone harmoniously chose to be someone on the Justice League and everyone was on the same team and then the rest of recess was really boring.

  80. frogman31680 says:

    My vote will be for Comcast. I have been a loyal bill paying subscriber of “Basic” cable and paid $4.00 a month for On Demand.

    Now, Comcast takes my on demand away and tells me to drive 30 minutes to return my cable box or pay $10.99 to have a technician return it for me.

    After 45 minutes of getting nowhere, I don’t think Comcast liked it when I told the executive customer service rep that I will take it to the Comcast office with a bill for my gas to drive there. When she said it doesn’t work that way, I think she got offended when I said that I’ll take it and throw it through the glass window on the front of the office. She then hung up on me.

    I have daydreams of that woman and her hammer. Now I understand. I now know where my loyalty and my vote will be going.

    P.S. COMCAST SUCKS, they are not worthy of a poo as beautiful as this one. So, say they won and say that it will be there between 12 and 5. Then don’t show up.

  81. harumph says:

    I love how swanky the Japanese is on the box. It just says “poo of gold” on the left hand side, yet it still looks classy.

    As for the Diebold debate, I think you need to have a serious repudiation of Occams razor to think that Diebold had nothing to do with the shenanigans in Ohio. If you want to berate me with a response, don’t bother. I am logging off and will be paying no attention.

  82. Rachacha says:

    @Nick1693: I imagine that the conversation went something like this:

    Award: Thanks for calling Fred’s custom awards, how can I help you?
    Ben: Ahh yes, I would like to order a custom award, you see, I am the Editor at a website called “Consumerist”. Have you heard of us?
    Award: Consumerist…Consumerist…Ahh yes, you are the people with the shrinking ray thingamabob.
    Ben: Kinda Yeah
    Award: Well what sort of award are you looking for, a statuette? A Crystal Cup?
    Ben: Not really, I am looking for something a bit crappier than that.
    Award: A traditional trophy? A nice plaque?
    Ben: Crappier
    Award: A certificate printed using “PrintShop” with a Dot-Matrix Printer.
    Ben: Nope, still too nice. You see, we are giving an award for the Worst Company in America.
    Award: Well I put my vote in for BestBuy. I gave them my computer for a simple tune up. They Lost my computer for over a month, and when I got it back, I found out that they stole all of my por..”pictures” formatted my hard drive, removed Windows Vista and installed Win 3.1..BASTARDS
    Ben:Sorry, BestBuy has already been eliminated, although they did make a good showing.
    Award: That’s too bad. How about we make a casting of a hand giving the thumbs down gesture
    Ben: No, not what I was hoping for, I need someth…
    Award: Aww crap. Hey Man, can you hang on for a second. My dog just took a big dump in the middle of my showroom.
    Ben: THAT’S IT Can you save that for me?
    Award: You want my dog crap?
    Ben: Well maybe, can you dehydrate it and plate it in gold?
    Award: Well yeah, but why would you want gold plated dog crap? You are one strange person.
    Ben: I think that this might make a GREAT award for worst company in America. Afterall, what better way to tell a company how $h!++y they are that with a big pile of $h!+. I can call a press conference and have Carey and Meghann wear pooh costumes, and We can have Mr Hanky from South Park deliver the award to the winner’s Board of Directors.
    How soon can you send that award to me?…

    And the rest is history…

  83. @Roxie: Why’d you have to spoil the mystery for me?

    Here I thought this was a custom-designed poo award, a veritable stroke of genius. I was really wondering who was responsible for the conception and design, reading intently Rachacha’s depiction of how one convinces a trinket maker to make poo and paint it gold. It was so well-designed, yet appeared so effortless. But now I know it was effortless, as easy as ordering one from a factory somewhere in Asia.

    Oh well. The Consumerist still gets points for deciding on a golden mound of crap. And now I can’t wait for the “your box was thrown away unopened” response from the winner.

  84. wildness says:

    Shouldn’t that be the runner up matchup??? Come on, Wal-Mart is the most evil company as they do all they can to reduce America and Americans to second class consumer slaves to greed and China; and, Diebold is second for stealing away our democractic ability to stop greed.

  85. cmdrsass says:

    @harumph: Interesting that you place so little confidence in your arguments that you have to make your snipes and run away without defending them with something like, I don’t know, proof?

  86. Benny Gesserit says:

    @wildness: Yes! There should a silver and a bronze poo but same shape as the others, a double-coiler with a DQ swirl!

  87. Roxie says:

    @Michael Belisle: Gee, I thought it’d be easy enough to find out about the, uh…history? tradition?…of the golden poo. Then again, I’ve seen those golden poo cell phone charms at jbox for years, so I didn’t really think anything of the Golden Poo award here, though I have to wonder where the Consumerist got such a huge one for the Worst Company in America.

    Anyway. I think the good folks at Consumerist should give out poo hats too: [jbox.com] The CEO of the Worst Company in America could get that big golden turd. The other exec’s of that company can get the poo hats so they don’t feel left out, and they, too, can look just as happy and proud of themselves as the jbox dude modeling his poo hat.

  88. @Bladefist: Given your avatar, I bet you ARE glad Diebold didn’t make it. Nothing to see heremove along

  89. @coren: You really, really need to read Grag Palast’s “The Best Democracy Money Can Buy” OR “Armed Madhouse.” If you think provisional ballots or absentee ballots are fully counted, I’ve got swamp land in Florida to sell you. There were districts in NM where 9 in 10 voters were counted as not having voted for president in 2004. Or in Ohio, where the Sec of State decided provisional ballots didn’t have to be counted. The Help America Vote Act just said provisional ballots had to be available. It never said they had to be counted. And in many red states, they weren’t. So the monopoly Diebold has on voting machines in many states mean many people are destined to have their votes not counted.

  90. guevera says:

    @Bladefist: This is painful… Bladefist is right.

    The 2000 election was stolen without the use of Diebold’s easily hackable voting machines. The 2004 election was LIKELY stolen without the use of Diebold’s easily hackable voting machines.

  91. pal003 says:

    @stevejust: I completely agree. And yes – it is relevant to this topic. Comcast and Countrywide came to the top of “Worst Company” this year because of no oversight and accountability by the Bush Administration.

    Comcast just got a “slap on the wrist” by the current FCC for serious violations.

    Countrywide and its brother IndyMac were allowed to criminally operate for years with no prosecutions by the Bush DOJ. Apparently many, many complaints with no follow-up.

    Countrywide now (BankofA**holes) deserves the award for helping to tank the economy, predatory lending, criminally fraudulent lending practices, and causing bank failures. I would love to see the award presented to Angelo Mozilo in jail very soon.

  92. DH405 says:

    @Bladefist: Yes, because this isn’t at all suspicious behavior.. The CEO of Diebold going and changing software out on voting machines. Himself. In person.

    [rawstory.com]

  93. Trai_Dep says:

    From the photos, I thought I was seeing a promo for 2001: A Poo Odyssey.

  94. Half Beast says:

    @Trai_Dep: My God. It’s full of foreclosures.

  95. newfenoix says:

    I’ve never had Comcast but I have personal knowledge of their crappy service. Never had a loan through Countrywide but I am WELL aware of what they did to the economy. As to politics…I was first able to vote in 1980 and voted for Reagan. And did so again in 84. Have not voted since. There is very little difference between the Republicans and the Democrats. It’s their voter bases that are different. And voter fraud is a long and time honored tradition in my home state of Arkansas. And we know who was governor there for many years don’t we?

  96. @newfenoix: Mike Huckabee?

  97. ThinkPink says:

    This is just hilarious to me. A golden poo for the poo-iest company. I wonder how they’ll feel. I wonder who will open it first? Sad! I would probably cry if I was the one. They’ll probably throw it away. Oh well. I think Countrywide deserves it for sure though.

  98. ConsumptionJunkie says:

    Cue the “Final Countdown”:

  99. ConsumptionJunkie says:

    cue the music:

  100. ogman says:

    Countrywide isn’t even a company anymore. Voting for Countrywide is like voting for the dead guy in the election; it doesn’t help anyone but the funeral home. Vote Comcast!

  101. @ogman: But a dead guy can beat John Ashcroft for Senate in Missouri….

  102. JustaConsumer says:

    Wal*Mart should be the winner. Comcast is freakin cable people. That is more important than Wally Mart destroying your country? Countrywide is evil, but small potatoes compared to Wal Mart. People are easily swayed and too concerned about their TV.

  103. FrankReality says:

    Two very deserving companies. May the worst win.

    Oddly enough, at one time I owned stock in Comcast and stock in Bank of America which later bought Countrywide. I dumped both due to the many customer disservice stories I read here. I figured if they treat their customers that poorly, sooner or later that would reflect poorly on the profitability of the company and thus their stock price.

  104. Whoa says:

    @JustaConsumer:

    Correct JaC, but using that logic, aren’t things like the entire U.S. economy (Countrywide) and people’s health (HMOs, insurance companies, etc) more important than tasteless underwear or a company that tries to keep its prices lower for everyone by trying to deter shoplifting? Even the instance about Walmart trying to “take away” the woman’s baby, while undoubtedly a horrific experience, was most likely done in a good faith attempt to make sure that the very same thing didn’t happen to someone else. IMHO, of the top five Walmart stories, the only one that truly resonated with any sort of possible corruption was the chemical-burn-sandals. I agree that Walmart *is* evil, but looking at both the actual harm they might have caused any particular individual and the effect they had on the country as a whole, I just don’t think that they measure up to what Countrywide did.

  105. Meathamper says:

    I hate Comcast, but I have no choice but to use them. I’m sorry, but the triple play lured me in.

  106. gman863 says:

    Countrywide or Comcast? That’s a tougher decision than deciding if Jeffery Dahmer or John Wayne Gacey deserves the “Extreme Makeover: Mass Murder Home Edition” trophy!

    My vote goes to Comcast.

    Although Countrywide was a major player in the mortgage meltdown, hundreds of smaller companies, thousands of shady mortgage brokers and the George W. Cunt (oops, I mean Bush) administration’s let freedom of shady business practices ring policy made the final results as inevitable as what would happen if Amy Winehouse was given free admission to an all-you-can-smoke crack buffet.

    Comcast, however, still has a free pass to rape customers in any market it serves with offers including:

    * “BLAZINGLY FAST INTERNET (so long as you don’t visit P2P sites or download too much shit in which case we’ll throttle your bandwith down to nothing)!”

    * “BUSINESS CLASS HIGH-SPEED INTERNET (that’ll make you wish you still had AOL dial-up as a faster alternative)!”

    * “MORE HIGH-DEF PROGRAMMING THAN SATELLITE (so long as we’re comparing it to the 12-foot circa 1985 dish in Billy Bob’s yard; not DirecTV or Dish Network)!”

    * “CRYSTAL CLEAR PHONE SERVICE (that’s the same technology and features as Vonage for almost twice the price)!”

    Bottom line: Comcast is a no-brainer winner.

  107. coren says:

    @BaysideWrestling: I live in a blue state, problem solved.