"So Apparently They Decided To Turn Our Apartment Complex Into A Nudist Colony"
Reader Sam writes in to let us know that his apartment complex is being converted into a "clothing optional" paradise. Tenants of The Arbors at Branch Creek, you are now the hedonistic residents of Eden!
According to Sam and an article in the Tampa Bay Times, current (clothed) residents of the apartment complex were unaware of the plans, and the apartment manager didn't know what was going on either. Sam says, "I don't mind nudist colonies, I just don't want to live in one! What really bothers me the most is the company that owns the property released the information to the public (news, etc.) before they even discussed it with the residents/apt. complex management." From Eden's "Lifestyles" page:
You're going to be very comfortable with our dress code. Our residents are welcome to shed more than their inhibitions as they enter the gates of Eden. Because when our residents come home after a busy day in the working world, they want to completely unburden themselves, shed the trappings of the outside world... and be totally free.
Sam says he's spoken with the office manager, who's promised that tenants who don't want to publicly explore their sensual sides will be able to break their leases without penalty, but he's worried, as there are lots of children and teens in the community. We browsed around on Eden's website (and we strongly encourage our readers to do the same, because it's hilarious), and we were shocked to find out that even the animals are naked.
Eden: As Nature Intended
(Photo: Getty)
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Comments:
They look annoying, but I'd still hit it (the woman). as long as she left the heels on.
As long as I have neighbors that look like her I would have no problems.
I should add that Mr. Consumerist is blocking that guy's upper junk because, as Meg put it, "I feel like maybe I know too much about him."
The only naked male on the entire site is the squirrel!
You know that's bullcrap. It will be a bunch of fat, naked men hanging around wondering why they are at a sausage party.
Wow! I personally wouldn't mind it, but seriously, they should have given the tenants a lot of notice or a vote in the matter.
God, they'd reverse that decision the first time I walked through the place naked. Well, they'd reverse it once their vision returned.
Dear god, not the children and teens! What will happen if they ever see a naked body? They might be accepting of others after realizing that under our clothes, we almost all look the same!
If I was toned and trim like our musical duo above, I would flaunt it like its going out of style.
I can totally see the squirrel's nuts!
The problem with nudity is that most nudists look like the rest of us.
And I know how hideous that is.
I think it was poor judgment not to ask/warn the tenants first. That's a huge change. Bonus question: Will it create a law violation? If youth see 'too much' could it create a problem?
Yeah.... naked encampments like this are definitely NOT full of hot chicks and muscled guys. They're generally fat farms. There's a nudist place just a mile or so down the road from me, and I certainly wouldn't want to spend much time there. You can see it from the water if you go by in a jetski or a boat, and they are some fugly people. Mostly guys.
Tampa: where anything goes!
The pic attached to this article would definitely fall into the NSFW category for my office. Can the editors please use additional discretion when selecting photos in the future? I would have appreciated a, "Hit the jump for NSFW pic..." warning or similar.
people join nudist colonies because they want to be nude, they live in apartment complexes because they want to live in an apartment complex.
im willing to bet there are some people who would not have chosen to live there if it had been a nudist apartment complex when they looked into it.
like wise some people would have found an alternative if they had known that a bunch of naked folk were being invited move in, clothing optional
Wow, that's sad... place looks really really nice on their site too. Of course, notice how all the people in the pics on the site are really attractive upper 20's types.
Either way, if I lived their, I'd be pissed. I'd be living there because it was a nice community, with very nice looking apartments, and now I'd have to go find another place to live.
It has to be said - She's got nice maracas. Be sure to tip your waitresses.
They'll have a "Citrus Fiesta" at the pool within a month or two. Not, you know, that there is anything wrong with that.
Glad I live where it's so very cold much of the year and the significant shrinkage issue would keep this from ever becoming a reality.
Gotta love Tampa, there is the clothing optional resort off of US41 in Lutz north of Tampa, you'd be amazed how many people drive by it not knowing it's there.
I'm not sure about the guys "think of the children!" appeal. There's the culture clash, sure but did you know that nudists often have kids who they raise nudist?
Maybe I'm just a bleeding-heart liberal.
I wouldn't be totally naked. Nekkid almost never equals hot.
I'd have a blindfold on to protect my sensitive eyes.
@freepistol: For real. And it's great that their going to let people break their leases without a financial penalty, but moving is the biggest hassle in the world and it can cost a whole lot of money, too. I can't IMAGINE what I would do if I woke up and read that my place was being turned into a nudist colony of all things. My neighbors are disgusting slobs when they're clothed. I can't imagine what's underneath.
Image: Bay Watch babes cavorting nakkid, playing volleyball.
Reality: Grandma squatting in front of you to pick up her paper.
But a totally hawt grandma!
I'd argue against Alex's referencing "exploring their sensual sides". I've been to a bunch of nudist beaches since a kid and it's not sensual. Just dangly and free. Oh, people? Remember to sunblock ALL your areas or suffer the consequences.
Can we have the image blocking the guy's unit extend to say, his sternum? Give us guys something to aspire to, Consumerist!
@Dakine: Move to California. Sure there's some average looking bare people, but it being what we are, quite a few (cough) presentable ones too. :)
Not that one should gawk, of course. Overtly.
Great website. Go look at any of the pictures and the full images all have titles that say "Photo caption here".
Ugh, I see enough of my neighbor's XXXL sized buttcrack and man boobs now - it's shockingly hideous. But him without a stitch on? Revolting. I could not live with that view.
I wonder if the owners are setting themselves up for a bunch of lawsuits. People who don't appreciate nudists will consider the owners to be creating a hostile environment since the residents won't feel comfortable there any more.
They might be accepting of others after realizing that under our clothes, we almost all look the same!
@Arkley: No. No we don't.
Oh crap. Can someone close that for me? SORRY!
@Michael Belisle: The only "think of the children" aspect that I thought of reading the above was that, if there are a lot of families with children and teenagers, there is a good chance that a lot of families who don't want their kids to grow up in a nudist apartment complex (whether because they're prudes or because their teenagers might have coronaries if the new residents were either as hot as the site seems to suggest or as hideous as we suspect) will have to pick up and move.
Excuuuuuuuse me while I whip this OUT !!!!!!
@ninabi: Naked is no.
Naked = normal. nudists. nude.
Nekkid = naughty ;) fun times with the SO
yep. Nekkid time with the girl in the pic is always appreciated. ;)
I've got nothing against nudists. And in fact, a previous comment said they should have brought it to a vote with the tenants.
Unfortunately, this isn't a co-op. Instead, it's an apartment building. Because of that, the landlord decides what goes, and they're probably realizing that they can get all the current residents out, revamp the place a little bit, and charge a premium for a specialized kind of living. It's a good idea, especially since fighting for renters is about location and amenities, and if this place is a bit removed from typical commutes, or is far away from where people work, then I bet with the rise in gas prices, they're going to have a tough time competing with other apartment buildings.
Solution: provide that special service for people who want it, and don't mind having to drive out to work (or are retired already, as it seems like a lot of nudists are).
@Alex Chasick: Mr. Consumerist does not look very happy about his current position. He thinks his rights have been violated.
My parents are nudist, and they have said themselves, "Most of the people are not pretty."
It doesn't sound all that bad on their website. They have a clothing optional pool and nude sunbathing. I've been to resorts with a similar setup and they are almost always screened off so casual passer-bys won't see anything. It certainly doesn't sound like people walking around everywhere naked.
This is hilarious - "lots of children and teens in the community." Heh. I grew up with hippie parents. Every vacation included a stop at nudist colonies. You know what, it really is no big deal. It is not sexual. In fact, as has been stated here, it's just a bunch of normal people who look like... a bunch of normal people. It's not attractive and it's most definitely not a turn on.
We're way too prude in this country. It shouldn't be an issue if your child sees someone naked. They see themselves naked all the damn time, what's the problem here? Afraid they're going to see a bunch of people who look exactly like themselves? I understand you don't want your children exposed to sexual activities, and neither do I, but nudity and sex are two entirely different things. Quite frankly sex is the LAST thing on anyone's mind when you're hanging around a bunch of naked people. Your teens will get much more horny gawking at one another's tight, short jeans. Stick 'em all in a room, naked, with other naked folk and the response will be quite the opposite of what the "save the children" crowd fears.
ahahhaahahahaha!!!
positive: warm sunny days on naked skin = lots of vitamin d
negative: skin cancer and alligators having a go at your jiggly bits because they are sans clothing protection.
@camille_javal: a lot of families who don't want their kids to grow up in a nudist apartment complex ... will have to pick up and move.
Yup. Worse things have happened.
@Trai_Dep: Reality: Grandma squatting in front of you to pick up her paper.
"There's good naked and bad naked. Naked hair brushing, good; naked crouching, bad. When you cough, there are thousands of unseen muscles that suddenly spring into action. It's like watching that fat guy catch a cannonball in his stomach in slow motion."
From the images on their site, it looks more like a swingers' club than a nudist colony. (Yes, there's a difference.)
As a retired massage therapist, I can tell you that most people look better naked. Which is NOT to say that they all look like sexual ideals. But they do look normal. The human body, taken as a whole with all of it's variations, is surprisingly unremarkable. Even the people that you think would be scary.
That being said, I would pissed if this happened to me with no warning. It's one thing to be comfortable with the body. It's another to be thrust into someone else's lifestyle without a vote.
Maybe I'm not understanding something, but the description doesn't seem true nudist... The swimming pool is described as "European style" (though in the pool image they seem fully nude). European style applies just to women, what about the men ? :)
So what is Eden trying to tell me? That all women that live there have large breasts and gorgeous bodies? Not that that's a bad thing, mind ...
@carso: I made it smaller on the main page so there isn't totally unexpected sexiness popping up, but, and this might make a good future post, if your job doesn't allow you to look at scantily or unclad people at work, you should probably look for another job...
Children and teens indeed....there will be naked animals roaming about! What is this world coming to, where young people can see a dog's bare ass. Someone hand me some pearls, I suddenly feel the need to clutch some.
@Alex Chasick: uh... so i mean, barring my job which requires it, you think it's good that employees can watch porn at work?
Well boo-fucking-hoo for you, mister nudeyville.
It will probably end up being mostly time-shared out as vacation apartments or for adult events. Could be fun.
At first this sounds cool, but then I think of my neighbors and realize that it's not very cool at all.