Diarrhea and memory loss. I'd hate to shit myself and not remember to clean up...

The most distrubing side effects ? Thats easy-

When highly suggestive people look at a 30 second ad and diagnose their imaginary illness and run to their doctor DEMANDING that drug.

Thats was easy.

2 words- Anal Leakage

Can I get the obvious one out of the way?

"See a doctor if your erection lasts for 4 hours". Thank you, Viagra. I wonder if this is a real side effect or an advertisement.

I have a feeling anal leakage will take the cake.

Spontaneous anal leakage cant remember the pill it was for though. At what point is this risk better then what you are diagnosed with?

Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball...

I'll keep my eye out for Viagra or some other drug like that that tells users to "seek immediate medical attention for any erection lasting longer then 24 hours"

I laugh every time I hear it...

All praise Alli.

From the Propecia website:

"Women who are or may potentially be pregnant must not use PROPECIA and should not handle crushed or broken PROPECIA tablets because the active ingredient may cause abnormalities of a male baby's sex organs. If a woman who is pregnant comes into contact with the active ingredient in PROPECIA, a doctor should be consulted."

Dang! I can't remember the name of the drug but the announcer said one possible side affect is "Blood in stool". Sweet!

Also, one where the announcer says "thoughts of suicide". Nice!

@qitaana:

That gets my vote.

From Viagra: blue-tinged vision

Pretty much any sleeping pill ad that has the immortal words:

"May cause drowsiness"

May, emphasis on the may.

Has death ever been mentioned as a side effect in any of these ads?

My personal favorite is "The way Veramyst works is not entirely understood."

So we've gone from having medicines to POTIONS.

@billbillbillbill: this is also a warning on potato chip cans. I think it was pringle's with olestra.

"You should know that some patients have reported changes in behavior, agitation, depressed mood, suicidal thoughts or actions when attempting to quit smoking while taking CHANTIX ...."

When my husband quit smoking 4 years ago, he had all those side effects and he didn't use the drug Chantix!

Shelle

There's a new asthma drug out there that lists one of the side effects as "asthma related death". That sounds like something I totally want to try.

A medication that I'm taking lists "Coma" as one of it's side effects.

Although I would say any medications like Ortho Evra (Birth Control Patch) that list "Death" as a side effect should win hands down. Anal leakage may be bad, but you can't beat a medication that has the balls to come right out and tell you it may kill you.

Darn! kaptainkk beat me too it

I can't recall what it was...but there was one that warned of "increased gambling habits" as a possible side effect.

Death and thoughts of suicide are pretty big favorites of mine. What cracks me up is the medicines meant to treat IBS and ulcers, etc, that say "may cause upset stomach, diarrhea, constipation, and overall digestive discomfort". Well, which is it, doc? And aren't those the symptoms of the original disorder??

Requip: "Also tell your doctor if you are experiencing new or increased gambling, sexual or other intense urges while taking Requip."

Hah! found it!
[www.drugs.com]

Not a side effect, but I just love any variation of "if you are or may potentially be pregnant."

Bloggy beat me to it.

this is great. i love how on the commercials the voiceover guy/girl lists them very calmly, as almost they're smiling chatting about something banal.

Diarrhea, nausea, acid reflux, severe headaches, etc, etc, etc - are are horrible things.

I always think "I'd rather just have the condition its trying to relieve"

I'd say death pretty much beats all.

I read on one of my wife's meds one time..

may cause brief psychotic episodes...

or something to that point. We had a good laugh about her stabbing me with a butchers knife in my sleep.

I locked up the knives once she was asleep.

Spontaneous bleeding from every orifice.

Accutane - an acne drug:
Side effects can include crying spells, rectal bleeding and bone fractures.

infections (including disseminated herpes simplex)

I'm sure it's going to be a popular entry but I gotta say the restless leg syndrome stuff has some pretty crazy side effects. IIRC, it was the ad for Requip that mentioned uncontrollable sexual, drinking, and gambling urges. And I, for one, believe the world would be a better place if it were more widely prescribed. =D

@BeFrugalNotCheap: The restless leg syndrome drug, Requip, with "an unusual urge to gamble or increased sexual urges and/or behaviors."

This Cracked article pretty much covers this thread: 6 Most Unsettling Medication Side Effects

I can't remember the name of it but it's a drug targeted towards women and it boasted that it had the added effect of clearing up your skin. When they named the side effects the last one they named was "dementia". After which they immediately repeated that it will clear up your skin.

But I can't remember what it was actually for.

Not a side effect, but an instruction on some of my prescription meds: "Take with or without food." I understand that this covers both "can I take this on an empty stomach?" and "must I take this on an empty stomach?" but from a coder's perspective, it just seems like a waste of processor bandwidth, e.g.

if (boolVariable = TRUE xor boolVariable = FALSE) then foo; // do this so long as boolVariable MAYBE

Side effects may include, (fill in the blank), and death.

Death?

Death is a "side effect"? I'm sorry, but I'm not convinced the benefits outweigh the risk of DEATH.

@Rectilinear Propagation: I think it was for ortho tri-cyclen.

Oh, I wish I could remember what it was for, but on the television ad, one of the side effects was "flatulence".

Tysabri (for Multiple Sclerosis) has a potential side effect of PML (unpronouncable), a mostly fatal brain disease which can and has killed people (2 I think). Liver failure is the newest warning, just a few weeks ago. Oh, joy.

So glad I am so desperate that I am willing to court death to keep walking.

Can't BigPharma do any better for us?

Hmm, '

From Olean: May cause anal leakage

@Rectilinear Propagation: Yup. Clincally proven to make your skin look better!

Here's what gets me. I can't remember what drug (or drugs) this came from but some list "Cold or Flu" as a side effect.

How the hell is this possible, unless the drug actually contains an active cold or flu virus?

oops, boolVariable != MAYBE

Which, you know, it can't. It's 1 or 0. True or False. Never 3/7ths.

I saw the one monkey33 mentioned but I was laughing so hard I forgot what drug it was for. I think some kind of feminine thing maybe?

I forgot what the drug was called, but I saw a commercial for an anti-depressant, and one of the side effects was "thoughts of suicide"

Isn't that what anti-depressants are supposed to fix?

My personal favorite though, isn't so much the side effects, rather, how they're presented in the commercial. I believe the medicine is Crestor. Anyways, in the commercial, instead of the typical narrator reading off a list of side effects, they're disclosed in a scene with a doctor talking to his male patient. Then the doctor says something like "Please tell me if you are a pregnant woman or nursing----blah blah blah." I'm also a guy, and if my doctor needs my help in figuring out if I'm a pregnant or nursing woman, then I'm finding a new doctor.

Are you sure it wasn't "cold or flu-like symptoms"?

Err, that was supposed to be @AD8BC