Once again we remind you not to drink too much at the airport before getting on your flight. We know airports are boring and sad and they make you want to kill the pain with copious amounts of gin. Don’t do it — or you could end up punching a JetBlue flight attendant in the face.
Meet Christina Elizabeth Szele of Woodside, NY. She was charged with assault and interference with flight attendants after she caused such a disturbance that her flight was diverted to Colorado. According to an FBI agent who witness the event, Szele yelled “obscenities and racial epithets” when a flight attendant tried to keep her from smoking, prompting the flight attendants to restrain her in plastic cuffs… Szele then broke through the cuffs, and commenced punching.
Szele had been drinking and doesn’t remember any of it, says the AP.
Woman accused of punching JetBlue flight attendant [Examiner]
(Photo: So Cal Metro )
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You can board a plane drunk, however its at the flight attendants discretion. If they feel that it would be best to get the person out of the airport and on the plane to pass out they will, however they will not serve any alcohol to that person. There are also times where someone drunk will get on board without the notice of the gate agent and its too late to get them off. Family members will sometimes sway the decision to allow the person on board, to not split up the group, and hopefully the family members can keep them in line.
@allstarecho: Anybody who doesn’t want assault charges filed against them?
I wish airlines charged $1,000 per ticket just to keep out the riff-raff.
Doesn’t really matter much anyway. In a couple more years flying will only be available to the super wealthy and diplomats. All commercial airlines will be extinct.
@allstarecho: Brings a whole new meaning to “bring your attendant back to her full upright position for landing”.
So I’m not seeing the part where the other passengers who didn’t want her smoking got in a few cheap shots of their own on old Christina. I am so disapointed, she shoulda flown Southwest. Its like Jerry Springer in the air, bitch would have eaten many knuckles that day.
@Lambasted: Ever heard of the term “Drink Responsibly”?? What makes you think you should get pissed drunk when you are flying, if you are at a party, thats one thing, but while flying? But noooooo the consumer can never be wrong.
@Juggernaut:
Umm….the FAA did.
@Dakine:
A lot of my friends don’t show any signs of being drunk until they “cross over”, and then it’s downhill. Also, why should the other 100+ passengers be uncomfortable to appease one person on a non-smoking flight?
@Gokuhouse:
I’ve never heard of someone’s cigarettes being confiscated by TSA. Even if they were contraband, that’s an issue between TSA and the passenger, not JetBlue.
Lastly, I find it pretty tough to get drunk on a plane. She was probably well on her way when she boarded, and just avoided any contact with JetBlue employees. It’s not difficult to hand your ticket to a gate agent and board a flight pretty tipsy. God knows I’ve done it a number of times.
@ImCrying:
“I wish airlines charged $1,000 per ticket just to keep out the riff-raff.”
I wish children were forbidden from flying at all. They’re worse than cig smoke, B.O., obnoxious talkers, know-it-all tourists, and seat kickers combined. The incessant whining makes me homicidal. And I would pay an extra $1000 just to make absolutely sure none of the little demons were on board.
@Preppy6917:
“Also, why should the other 100+ passengers be uncomfortable to appease one person on a non-smoking flight?”
How do you know they are non-smokers? You could very well be the only non-smoker on the flight, but you’d never know because of the feel-good smoking ban.
@Dakine:
I never said they were all non-smokers, but JetBlue states on it’s website right here that Federal law bans smoking on all domestic flights 6 hours or less.
I would be all for a 21+ airline though…and I’m only 27! Keep the kids on Southwest….
@Dakine: ITA. The first company to create a child-free airline will get all of my business regardless of cost. I HATE children on airplanes, and I REALLY HATE the idiot parents who let their kid scream and bother other passengers. Control your kid or throw them in the backseat of a car and drive them to Grandma’s!
@Lambasted: If airports and airlines are going to serve alcohol, they should expect the drunken consequences.
So, people are responsible for drinking themselves into a stupor, the AIRPORT is?
Comment got ate:
@Preppy6917: The FLIGHT is designated non-smoking, not the people. If the regulation states you can’t smoke, you can’t smoke. Period.
@Tightlines:
As a non-smoker I would take smoke stink over 70-year-old-woman-doused-in-some-horrible-brown-perfume stink any day.
@ceejeemcbeegee:
They can also keep you on a grounded plane on the tarmac for 12 hours with no restroom, water or food, but that ain’t right either.
/Szele yelled “obscenities and racial epithets”/
Quotes you NEVER want to see your name next to in print.
bic lighters are allowed on planes now. They reversed the ban on lighters and matches almost a year ago.
@Steaming Pile: I’m totally with you. I suffer the full depressant effect of alcohol. When I drink, I’m mellow, quiet, happy and sleepy.
I’ve heard it’s difficult to board a plane when drunk, but apparently it’s not impossible. Personally, I hope the flight attendant punched back.
My drug of choice though, when flying, is valium. Same effect, none of the smell, and no hangover.
Hmm, that lady is from my neighborhood. I guess we can have a new claim to fame: “For your own safety, please do not mess with the Woodsiders when they’re drunk.”
So, the FBI agent just sat/stood by and watched? Let the flight attendants handle everything? Wow, what a load of relief! It’s very reassuring to know that if there ever is another irate passenger on our planes, there will be a convenient FBI agent witness. There’ll also be an FBI agent witness who conveniently stood by and watched two irate men storming into the cockpit too? Oh, let the flight attendants handle them!
It makes me glad about what happened on my last flight. I got stuck next to a moron whose clothes stunk of cigarettes and sniffled like a five year old child despite being ten times that age.
Luckily the FA was willing to move me to a different seat. I had never sat next to or interracted with muslims before, but at least I got sit to someone with better personal habits, even if it meant I couldn’t have a drink during the flight.
Vodka baby, Vodka….. just make sure you get drunk after the security check point and not before it, the latter gives you problems when you are trying to hold up your pants while trying to put on your shoes hopping on one feet because the fat gentleman behind you is trying to get his 2 laptops through the xray.
SNL needs to make a digital short about this. “Punched before flying”
@timmus: Hell yeah. I’d smoke a lot more than cigarettes in there if that room were to exist. Hotbox FTW
“An FBI agent witnessed the event”
I wonder if he was just flying somewhere or working for Homeland Security. Why would he let the flight attendants handcuff her if he was with law enforcement? Did he just sit by and watch all this or step up and help?
Re: kids on flights – ANY airlines that bans kids gets my business. I once walked off a flight where a 4 year old was going to sit on mom’s lap for a six hour flight. I told the airlines that 4 people were sitting in 3 seats and that either they get the kid her own seat or let me off, they comped my ticket, paid my hotel and meals and I left the next day. This was 5 years ago, I doubt if they would do that now.
I bring 10 pairs of earplugs with me on all flights and pass them out to the poor people sitting next to the screaming child. Children are nasty to fly with.
Were the other passengers charged $5.00 for the in-flight entertainment?
@Jubilance22:
Screw that…throw them in the TRUNK. Takes care of all the “Are we there yet?” bullshit.
@Lambasted: I’m with you. What do they expect after treating everyone the way they do? When is too much abuse too much?
Amen! Anytime I see someone with their precious little snowflakes I just want to scream. I would pay a surchage for now kids
…says the people who don’t have children. Egads.
Look, I’m flying soon, taking the kids, and the wife and I bring along a sufficient number of distractions and snacks for them. They haven’t had fits or issues before and I don’t anticipate any this time either.
I think the criers are typically those around 1 year or younger or, possibly, because mom/dad didn’t make very good provisions for the trip. And then there are those that simply don’t discipline their children in any way. For those I can definitely share in your dislike.
And I dislike the racket at 30k feet, as well, but what are you going to do? Stew about it and make the parents feel guilty about something they may not have control over? Believe me, as a parent, there’s nothing I like better on a trip (by plane, train, or automobile) than s-i-l-e-n-c-e. And I do what can/must not only for other passengers, but also myself.
@ImCrying: “I wish airlines charged $1,000 per ticket just to keep out the riff-raff.”
So only people who can’t afford $1000 for a plane ticket are “riff-raff”? Because, obviously, people with lots of disposable income never do anything wrong. Never.
@Jubilance22:
@Dakine:
You don’t hate kids on airplanes, you hate kids. Did you come out of the womb as an adult. Were you never a kid? Did your parents never take you anywhere until you were 18?! Jesus Fuckin’ Christ!
@P_Smith:
You couldn’t drink Alcohol because you sat next to a Muslim? That’s weird. Muslims aren’t supposed to drink alcohol or sell/transport it, but there is no reason for you not to be able to drink alcohol while sitting next to one. Unless you were requested not to.
My cousin kind of drugs his kids on planes, he will give them a sip or two of cough syrup, which will put them to sleep for a few hours
@floyderdc:
My 2 precious little snowflakes are extremely well trained as to plane etiquette. I come armed with Nintendo DS’s, portable DVD players with a wide selection of movies, a laptop, books to read, coloring books, snacks, drinks bought after the security checkpoint, and benadryl. My kids fly 8 to 10 times a year and are better versed at getting through the airport and behaving on a plane than many adults. Every flight they have been on, we have people compliment them on their behavior.
Blame the parents, not the kids. Many kids are acting out in reaction to an entirely new environment. Many have no discipline in their lives to begin with. It is the job of the parent to PARENT, which means educating and discipling your children. As for crying babies, I hate them too. I used to keep my kids awake prior to flights. I would in no way allow them to take a nap, even when it was their naptime. On early morning flights, I would wake them up extra early. I also kept them a little hungry, not starving, but hungry, so that I would get on the plane, sit down, whip out a bottle and BAM! sleeping baby for the entire flight.
Has this woman EVER flown? Is she so out of touch that she doesn’t know that smoking on airplanes has been banned for years? the flight attendant should have punched HER. What a jackass.
I think smoking is the LEAST of this woman’s problems… lol
This woman must be fun at parties!
As for the kids on a plane thing, I am with those that will pay a premium for a flights with no kids on board. My last trip I had a 2 year old constantly kicking me on a 5 hour flight. All her mom could do was apologize over and over. Good thing I was tired from a 7 hour layover and full of rum and coke. I slept the entire trip, woke up with 10 mins to go and the kid was still kicking me.
@Caslonbold:
Actually there was no FBI agent on the flight. He just wrote the affidavit. The Consumerist was mistaken. TheSmokingGun has the affidavit and a mug shot taken of the charming Christina from last year following a disorderly conduct bust in California. So basically she just travels the country spreading sunshine.
@DallasPath: Kids are different, though. I had someone give me similar advice to what you did before my first flight with the kid. He screamed his head off the entire time. Nothing I did mattered. I wished I’d read more internet message boards back then. I felt so bad for the other passengers. I was mortified. I wouldn’t feel a bit bad about it nowadays after reading all the shitty comments about kids being demons, and awful parents not doing their jobs.
After that trips went better, because I did the opposite after that, and things went pretty smoothly. But, if I were traveling with small kids today, I wouldn’t even worry if I were bothering anyone else, because chances are they bitched about it on the internet somewhere in an awful, hateful manner. So, fuck ‘em. I say to parents today to do your best and not even worry about the other passengers, because they can wear plugs or get bent. That’s what internet asshatery has done for me.
Plastic cuffs are crazy strong, and she just broke through it? She should be given the death penalty.
quite the looker:
[www.jaunted.com]
@Syd:
claire forlani pulling a crack hoe….
Flying with kids can be a challenge, but I echo the points made by other posters. There is a lot parents can do to make the situation a non-issue. Our rule with traveling with our kids was that they were expected to behave. Once they were older than 5, they were expected to pack and be responsible for their own carry-on. Once they were each age 10, they were responsible for their (carry on size) suitcase — packing, wheeling, etc.
I’d stack a well-behaved young traveler up against a self-centered cellphone yapper any day of the week (besides, they don’t spill over into your seat space). Speaking of yappers, I’m hoping that the rumblings about allowing cellie use in-flight has died a much-deserved death.
I much prefer Ben Kingsley in “Sexy Beast”
I don’t believe this story for a second. What probably happened was a situation similar to “The Forgotten”, where she did nothing wrong but the aliens made it look that way to set her up.
Or, everyone else on the plane was drunk and she was the only sober one, and they fabricated everything.
It had to be! There’s no way a woman with such a pretty name could ever be such a dimwit.
@hypochondriac: You couldn’t drink Alcohol because you sat next to a Muslim? That’s weird. Muslims aren’t supposed to drink alcohol or sell/transport it, but there is no reason for you not to be able to drink alcohol while sitting next to one. Unless you were requested not to.
I never said that I couldn’t or wasn’t allowed. I chose not to.
First, it was a daytime flight, and I only drink late in the evening. Second, going without a drink on a three hour flight is less of a hardship than going without meat for a meal, something I usually do if I’m eating with a vegetarian (as I said somewhere before on this site). Showing a little courtesy isn’t going to kill me.
@Syd: quite the looker:
She looks like nearly all 10+ year female smokers I’ve ever met: stringy hair, sallowed cheeks, yellowed skin, bad teeth and (probably) tobacco breath.
Women like that wonder why I won’t date them, and when they ask and I tell them the reasons – politely – most freak out the same way that cow did. They act as if I had told them to jump in front of a train, which I am sorely tempted to do after the fact.