T Mobile: Listen To The Most Pointless Customer Service Call Ever
Kapil's brand new Blackberry arrived with a battery that won't charge. He wants T-Mobile to exchange it, but he says T-Mobile wants to replace it with a refurbished Blackberry instead of a new model. Kapil is fighting back, but even at the executive support level all he's found are rude, uncooperative T-Mobile employees who keep saying there's a process, and that someone will call him back—which never happens. Kapil refused to hang up on the fourth day and demanded to know what happens next after nobody calls back, which seemed to confuse and anger the T-Mobile rep he was speaking with. And for those of you who can't listen in, we've transcribed some of the juiciest parts.
After a few minutes, the rep grows audibly annoyed with Kapil and tries to get him off the phone:
Your other option is to call customer care.
The reason I'm calling your executive office is because customer service has failed me and they are not helping me, and now you're telling me that my only recourse is to continue leaving messages but no one is calling me back. I have called every day--
[cutting in] Sir, sir, we took a message this morning. He has 24 hours to give you a call back.
I understand there was a message left this morning--
[talking over him] Okay, so-- but--
--but there was also a message left on Monday, and Tuesday, and Wednesday of this week and no one has called me back.
Uh, uh, from the notations in the account I don't--
So you're telling me the notes are more accurate than me? Because on this conversation there's only one person that was part of that initial conversation and... it's not you. I'm telling you that I've called all this week--
[cutting in] I'm telling you nobody from my team, nobody from my team, uh, went into your account.
What if they forgot to leave a note to that effect? Is that my problem?
It doesn't matter, that's not how our system works sir. Even if they were in the account and, and, and didn't leave a note, it still shows there in the account.
So what if I--
[cutting in] At, at this point sir, I'm not going to argue with you. I can give you a phone number. If you need immediate assistance you have customer service to call. Okay?
I have tried--
[overlapping] Do you have any other questions or concerns for me?
I have tried customer service and they have refused to help me, so I called your executive office--
[cutting him off] Well sir, this is your option at this point, sir.
May I speak to a supervisor in your department?
No sir, you're not calling customer service, you're calling our executive offices.
This goes on and on like a Beckett play for a while. Eventually Kapil tries a different tactic, and discovers that just because he's been led to believe he's speaking to executive customer service, he may have actually been rerouted to regular customer service on his previous calls:
You're evading my question here. I understand your process, that someone will call me back in 24 hours. I'm asking, if that does not happen, what's happens next?
Somebody will call you back within 24 hours sir.
(Laughing) Are you a South Park fan at all? The TV show? [silence] Ever seen that TV show?
(Pause) ...No.
There's an episode of South Park where... imagine you're a character called the Underpants Gnome. And these Underpants Gnomes are stealing everyone's underpants, and when asked why they're doing that they put up a sign that says Step #1, collect underpants, Step #2, a bunch of question marks, and Step #3, profit. When you ask them what step #2 is, nobody knows. You're kind of doing that to me, I'm asking you if this doesn't happen, if your process doesn't work the way that it's supposed to, which it hasn't for me all week, what is the next step in the process. Like, how do I get past this?
Okay, again I'm telling you, you may have called the corporate office, but more than likely, it looks like from what I can see that you may have gotten transferred back to customer service, okay? As far as our team receiving the call, the first call that was received by our team this week was this morning, okay? So, from that point we have 24 hours to call you back.
But I have somebody on the phone. You're in the same department.
I'm trying to explain our process sir. Do you understand it or do I have to explain it again?
Twelve minutes in, we find out that the mysterious Pancho—he's the Godot-like character who's supposed to call Kapil back—isn't even someone Kapil has spoken to before, although Jason doesn't seem to understand or believe that. And at about the 13:30 mark, Jason finally gets upset enough that he reveals that he does have a record that Kapil has called several times before—something he has kept denying knowledge of throughout the call.
It's really a masterclass in how to pretend to offer customer service while stonewalling a customer. We like to imagine there are posters up around the T-Mobile offices that display our favorite line from Jason: "It's not a refusal, sir, it's how our process works."
(Photo: Getty Images)
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Comments:
Wow.
this is exactly why i'm getting rid of t-mobile when my contract is up in July. ICK.
WTF is wrong with Tmobile? What is so hard about exchanging a battery? Give the guy a new battery! Seriously, that's the only way you're ever going to "get rid of him".
This guy has the patience of a saint. I'd have blown up before the 10 minute mark for sure.
I've heard horror stories aplenty about T-Mobile. With cellphone companies I imagine you trade one agony for another so there aren't a lot of improvements between companies, but T-Mobile sounds particularly miserable.
Never had an issue with T-Mobile. They have a 14 day return in which he could return the phone (free of charge, they even pay the shipping) and then reorder a new one. It only takes about 7 days total. I have done it before. I do not usually rag on the consumer, but I think there is an easier way...or he is leaving out the part of the story.
I have to say I have never had a bad customer service experience w/ Tmobile. I've been a customer of theirs for years and they cut me deals frequently to keep me.
ANyone here listen to the audio and they both sound like f'n chipmunks?
Or is this a problem with my webbrowser?
I just want to thank the Consumerist for posting a transcript. I can't listen to the audio right now, and I appreciate being able to read part of it.
Incredible. I was just about switch over to T mobile in a few months once my contract was up with AT&T. I'm going to reconsider.
Step 1 - Give him a new battery
Step 2 - ?????????
Step 3 - Profit
nice underpants gnomes reference!
1. Reference underpants gnomes.
2. ????????
3. Laugh.
Yeah, this is the curse of modern customer service. It's a very efficient system for getting rid of customers, with no actual ability to resolve problems outside of that system's design. Sort of like the movie Brazil.
This reminds me of the time that I had to warranty exchange a defective phone when I used to have T-Mobile. The CSR needed me to confirm two things before he would do the swap:
- They only exchange the handset part, not the battery, battery door, or charger, or any other accessories.
- There was a slight chance I might get a different model phone back if they were out of stock on my phone.
So I then asked "If I do get a different model phone, it'll have a new battery, battery door, and charger, right?" To which he responded "No!"
…And then it began, back and fourth we went, he just kept arguing that I should agree because the chance of getting a different handset was infinitesimally small, but I refused to because I didn't want to spend >$50 on new accessories if that infinitesimally small chance did happen. I also wanted them to show me where, in the warranty terms, it said they were allowed to do this. He couldn't. I ended up getting escalated, and the supervisor kept arguing the same thing, until finally, after an hour the supervisor just caved and did the exchange, and notated my account that I didn't agree with the second part.
What is the process to get a hold of these customer service conversations? Or is there a program I can use from my BlackBerry to record conversations?
tmobile is a bunch of scammers. they extended my contract twice without telling me. now im stuck with them forever. multiple times i have called there and no one EVER calls you back
I remember getting this link from an article (on this blog at one point) for using your computer.
Kudos on the wonderful Underpants Gnome reference.
1. Keep customers in an endless loop of stupidity, ignorance, and failure while their accounts remain active and billing.
2. ?????
3. Profit.
Well, actually in this case, there is no step 2. This is exactly what's happening.
[Continued0... Using your computer to record Customer Service Calls.
\Warning: Legalness of this will vary by state
Did he get a call back within 24 hours from Pancho??
sidenote: great lunch place by me, Pancho's Burritos... Coincidence? I think not.
@CBragg: He probably didn't actually note anything in your account, either. Tech support is notorious for that.
very entertaining call to listen to, never any answer to the customer's question. Stuck forever in an infinite recursive process loop. If problem, go to process. If process fails, go to process.
So this is where Consumerist tends to fall short- What happened after this call???
I would rather have heard a recording of what this guy said to Pancho when he finally DID call back.
This needs follow up.
Here's my dealings with T-Mobile "customer service":
1. Sell me a Sidekick and a Samsung phone
2. Bill the Samsung phone for Sidekick service even though it's not a Sidekick
3. Refuse to refund me for the Sidekick service despite having records that the Samsung phone never even used the Sidekick service (duh)
4. Eventually get a CSR to grudgingly offer a partial refund.
5. CSR issues LESS than the agreed upon partial refund and does it in such a way that in a follow-up call another CSR says that no further credits can be issued at all.
6. When attempting to combine my wife's and my T-Mobile accounts, a T-Mo in-store rep threatens me (I have a police report to prove it!).
7. T-Mobile customer relations does nto care to follow up with even an apology.
8. ???
9. Profit!
The only reason I'm still with T-Mobile is because all of the mobile providers are so patently incompetent across the board that switching now that it's stable will only bring more erroneous charges and more visits from the f*ckup fairy.
UNREAL. According to Jason's own words, apparently you are stuck with the same inept customer rep you are assigned to for a LIFETIME, no matter what. What I want to know is, did ANYONE finally call him back that day?
*Shoots self in head*
TMobile has always been good to me until I demanded something and they completely shut down. That experience, more than a year ago is why I have purchased a TMobile phone from eBay and am completely bypassing signing a contract with them. This is also besides the point of when I looked at buying and resigning with them they told me I would incur an $18 activation fee and I've been a customer of theirs since having a cellphone. Why should I have to pay that? It's insulting.
This was incredibly aggravating to read good luck man!
thanks for transcribing the best parts of it.
I have actually dealt with Pancho in executive customer service, and he was a nice enough guy. Kapil should call the number for executive customer service and ask to speak with Pancho directly.
I am having similar problems with T-Mobile. My daughter's SideKick ($400) which she covets is defective. It freezes up and resets itself many times in a day. This phone is 5 months old (purchased 2 weeks after its market debut) and has been taken care of. No water damage, no drops, etc. My daughter initially phoned customer service and went through the issues and was told that we needed to take it into a store to be replaced. The rep further announced that this was not an isolated problem. Located a store (which had the wrong operating hours posted) only to find the door locked and a badge toting off duty Chicago police officer at the door. After dialing TMobile to find out "why" their hours has not been changed on the site, the manager, Trent comes to the door. He tells me that the rep could have handled the exchange over the phone but they like to "see" the phone before they make an exchange to make certain there isn't any "water" damage. He also tells me that this isn't an isolated problem but he can't help me because even though the store has 5-6 customers in the store, his system is shut down but there is another store not far which has longer hours. I made my way to the store with kids and spent 2 hours there sitting at the counter with a very nice customer service rep. This location also had an off duty police officer with his badge hanging around his neck. I would like to point out that I live in a very nice area in Chicago and such protection isn't necessary. Perhaps consumers are fed up with the total lack of customer service and need muslce to move along those who have had enough. Now back to the phone... the store rep had to call the service center. This took almost 90 minutes. I asked the customer service rep if this freezing up and resetting itself was a widespread problem and she did not answer me. I then asked for a new phone to be sent. I had to pay for expedited shipping and when I asked to speak with a customer service supervisor I was placed on hold for 20 minutes at which time she came back and told me that she had spoken to her supervisor and that because I was already at the store there wasn't any way they could waive the fee. I then asked to speak with the supervisor again and was told that they were too busy to speak with me and that if I really wanted to speak to them I would have to wait another 30 minutes. I told the T Mobile store rep to complete the transaction that I would aruge about the fee given I spent time and money going to two different stores for help. I phoned customer service the following day and they happily gave me a $15 credit, and suggested that I send a detailed comment on their webiste because they take proper customer service very seriously. The phone arrived in 4 days time only to find that it was a "like new" phone aka refurbished phone. I immediately called T Mobile and spoke with Pierre who transferred me to Kyle. He seemed to care and suggested that he contact the company directly to request a new phone because they were on East coast time. He promised to phone me the very next day once he got in at 10am and had a bit of time to get a few things out of the way. The entire day came and went and no call. I then phoned in again and spoke with a supervisor who told me that he had no idea why Kyle would attempt to contact the company. He then indicated that if I wanted to upgrade and purchase "new" phone, that I could do that. I then asked him why would I spend more money on a phone that is defective when they should be replacing it for no cost at all. He said that was the best he could do. I then asked to speak with his supervisor and he told me that his supervisor was "armed" with the same tools that he was and I would not hear anything different. I then insisted on speaking with his supervisor. I was placed on hold and then told that his supervisor would phone me in an hour. It's been 4 days and I'm still waiting for that call.
Cell phone companies are like politicians..... you need to accept their all less than perfect and align yourself with the one that will help you and your causes. In this case, TMobile has sold me a defective merchandise which I extended my contract to purchase at a discount which wasn't really worth it, sent me a refurbished one, refused to answer my questions regarding the problem, and doesn't return phone calls. It would appear that they no longer care about customer service. It reminds me of that Capital One commercial with David Spade. I plan to go all the way up the ladder, but it sounds like the problem starts with shoddy management. In the end why wouldn't they want the phone to work.... it is a vehicle to earning them revenue unless they're only in the market of selling defective equipment. Maybe they don't make money off of usage anymore.........
This reminds me of dealing with escalated issues at Sprint. If it was something we couldn't deal with at normal customer service, we had to create a "case" that sent to some mysterious department (that could NOT be contacted in anyway by phone mind you) and give a customer a 72 hour turnaround time. If 72 hours past and nothing happened we could do nothing except resubmit it and tell them to wait another 3 days. How's that for an efficient system.
It's funny how certain phrases are common call center jargon when dealing with customers. "I do apologize" is one of the most common, as are "you need to understand" or just "Again sir/ma'am [re-explain situation without providing solution]" or "that's how the system works". That was our de facto answer when a customer had an issue we couldn't explain "That's just the way the system works"
Make sure you all link this in an e-mail and forward to all your friends. Tell them to contact another phone company like AT&T and see if they will credit you the T-Mobil termination fee to join their network. Enough of this crappy customer support bull, lets show companies that we are not gonna take it any more.
I think Kapil is being very nice. There was NO reason for the rep not to take over the issue and do his job. What else is he there for? To call other peoples customers to let them know when other reps would be calling them back? I hate T-Mobile...I hate AT&T...but I'm not really home enough for a home line. What choice is there until we can get these companies to clean up and start treating customers well?
@Sockatume: Exactly right.
Someone needs to play this conversation on the floor of Congress to show them what the average American has to go through multiple times per week just to get the goods and services that we pay for. It's high time for a Customer Service Bill of Rights cause most large companies doing business in America today are hopelessly broken.
Hats off to Kapil; he handled himself very well throughout the tortuous stupidity of that T-Mobile rep. Jason was worse than useless. T-Mo would be better off playing a recording that says, "Please call customer service and someone will get back to you. This is our process."
They can then save money by firing "Jason" The Underpants Gnome.
Present your case to competing companies in your area. Since T-Mobile has obviously spent all the time and money they want to on obtaining you and keeping you as a customer, your options are rather limited at best.
See if AT&T, Verizon, etc, will be willing to assist you with the termination fees with T-Mobile in your effort to get reliable service. Share with them this call recording, any and all documentation you have, and let them decide.
Basically you are asking for credit for someone else's mistake, so be prepared to wait while someone decides if that is a good business move. Ultimately, they might take the offer because it will prove to be excellent PR for that market.
[Blank carrier] makes good on T-Mobile's folly!
Or something like that.
Then present T-Mobile with that early term fee payment in the form of a check from your carrier - along with a letter shared on every consumer site on the web. CC J.D Power, or any other company that has cited T-Mobile with highest rated customer service.
Remind them it is all subjective anyway. [Which will be their primary objection, anyway]
Metrics-schmetrics....
I think corporations like T-Mobile have given up on trying to provide customer service.
@iEddie: (425) 378-4991
email:
sue.nokes@t-mobile.com
Might have been changed though. No guarantees.
I kind of hope someone goes postal on one these places one day, maybe then they'll get the message. But probably not, they'll just vilify the poor guy they drove to violence.
this outfit is really terrible...i don't have a cell phone yet, but the service i do get will not be them....i'll also spread the word....i'm listening to the recording...what a dump job....
@iEddie:
Damn, you beat me to it!
I was going to suggest going through her as well...we had her help out with certain things at the airline I work for and from what I know of her, she'd flip a lid if she found out how much crap the OP had to go through....
The sue.nokes@t-mobile.com is a screened email address, but I forwarded the link to this thread to her directly. Is there a way to PM the OP or how would I/T-Mobile go about contacting the right customer named Kapil?
Seriously Kapil, way to keep your cool. Well done.
@LUV2CattleCall: Easy. Ask Jason The Underpants Gnome. He said he'd "forward Kapil's contact info to Pancho", right?
I believe there is a chance that Pablo has not been given orders to call this guy back for whatever reason (maybe Kapil wasn't transferred to the right dep't or whatever.
Now that K has a recording saying that Pancho will call him back within 24 hours, he should give them one more chance. If Pancho doesn't comply, he's got T-Mobile by the bawls.
And if the contact number is his cel phone, then he and a Tmobile rep should look at his bill or recent usage to see whether or not Pancho has called.
True story:
About a year ago my wife's phone's battery went kaput about 9 months into our contract.
We have Cingular/AT&T, and we took it back into the store we bought it from... the rep gave us a brand new OEM battery completely free of charge and apologized for the inconvenience.
Doesn't get much better than that...
Woo, AT&T!@#%^&
Kapil is far, far calmer than I would be. That entire call is just head-deskingly unbelievable.
Jason is a douchebag. There's no reason at all that he could just say 'Sure, how about I help you with the problem you're having?'
South Park Reference, ftw!