More Gross Stuff Found In Vitamin Water

Vitamin Water doesn’t just contain vitamins. It also contains gross skin-looking things. Sometimes it even contains gross bodily fluid-looking things. Another picture, and a chance to speculate on what this is, inside.

Steven writes:

Was about to drink some Vitamin Water this morning when I noticed this gunk floating around in it. Luckily I didn’t open or drink any of it yet. Here are some attached pictures. Purchased from Kroger in Blacksburg, VA. Will go return it next time I’m there.

That’s two possibly human, uh, products in your bottles that we’ve posted about, Vitamin Water. What gives? Is this flavor called Soylent Green? Or perhaps someone at the plant took it upon himself to implement your ad campaign? Either way, we’ll be closely scrutinizing the several Vitamin Waters we chug each day.
trysperm2.jpg

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Comments

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  1. comedian says:

    Looks like a piece of filter media.

  2. ganzhimself says:

    Was this found in the Sears’ whack-shack? Yuck.

  3. KD17 says:

    oh i’m sure it’s just some extra vitamins…..

  4. ThunderRoad says:

    Now protein rich!

  5. chiieddy says:

    I’m sure whatever crap they add as ‘vitamins’ in this is in powder form and doesn’t necessarily dissolve completely.

  6. kkaabboomm says:

    this happened to me with a bottle of dasani water – i called coke about it, and they said it sometimes happens in the warehouse w/temp differences allowing growth inside. they sent me a box, i sent them the bottle so they could test it, and they sent me 4 coupons for free 12 packs of coke products. so it happens, and they said it wasn’t anything bodily.

    the bad thing was i took a swig of my water and spat it out as it tasted so incredibly bad.

  7. laserjobs says:

    It is glucose or fructose congealing. It happens after awhile, probably an old bottle. Kind of like a gelation. I tok a swig of a gatoraid that had a big glucose slug in it once without noticing, pretty disgusting.

  8. Double J says:
  9. bohemian says:

    I don’t even want to know what could be found in a bottle of Fuse. That stuff is massively gross and supposedly contains milk.

  10. sleze69 says:

    Stop it, just STOP IT. You’ve already ruined Snapple for me! This needs to be the last yucky crap in a bottle post!

    Luckily I don’t buy into vitamin water but I still drink diet coke from time to time and I don’t want to see jizz floating in it.

  11. WannaBblonde says:

    It looks like it have been lugified by someone – nasty!!

  12. stupidjerk says:

    extra protein??

  13. b612markt says:

    so nasty – something similar happened on a much larger scale to Schlitz beer several decades ago.

  14. meepmeep says:

    As part of the buyout deal with Coca-Cola, 50 Cent was promised that one out of every 100 bottles of Vitamin Water will have his DNA mixed in.

  15. goodywitch says:

    Man, and I liked vitamin water. OK, I’ll make my own over-priced very-diluted juice drink from now on…

  16. @laserjobs: big glucose slug. Awesome.

  17. dereksea says:

    XXX Cherry Pomegranate is looking mighty thirst quenching right now. Rescue Green Tea, we’re done.

  18. P.T.Wheatstraw says:

    I used to guzzle Snapple like it was going out of style, until I (nearly) swallowed one of these WTF-is-its.

    This was 1994, and I have never drunk any kind of bottled fruit juice or gimmick water since.

  19. kelptocratic says:

    Please don’t ruin Honest Tea. I beg you. Just don’t.

  20. parad0x360 says:

    This is exactly the reason why I drink normal water and get my vitamins from FOOD.

  21. benjimandodd says:

    One day down at the vitaman water warehouse, Joe was just having a horrible day. Everything was going wrong, people were yelling at him, it was just a very stressful thing to do.

    Lunchtime comes around, the place clears out and Joe has just GOT to relieve some stress. SO Joe goes behind the line, thinks about that hot new girl in bottling, and as he’s about to relieve that stress, he realizes he doesn’t have anything to relieve himself IN…

    One man about to erupt, a million empty bottles just waiting to be filled with something.

    You do the math.

  22. MikeGrenade says:

    @parad0x360 +1

    Vitamin Water tastes like the flavoring they put in cough medicines anyway. I don’t get why people like it so much.

  23. krom says:

    Everyone at the office seems to love Vitamin Water. As for me, I’m clearly defective as a human, because each of the bottles we get in the office do the exact opposite to me than what their label says — Energy makes me drowsy, Focus makes me ADD. I steer clear and stick to Talking Rain.

  24. B1663R says:

    y’know, semen does contain vitamins and stuff.

    look it up it’s true!

  25. Gross? Yeah kinda. Something to make a big deal out of? No, not really. It happens. You’re probably willfully ingesting far worse for you things every day, like preservatives and several metric ton’s refined sugar and salt.

    This is not an issue with one company or a certain product but an occasional yucky thing which requires you to, ya know, grab a different bottle or entirely different brand of drink if you’re too grossed out.

    Get over it.

  26. nadmonk says:

    Man, that’s disgusting.

    Having to drink that sugary water to get your man-shake?

  27. azntg says:

    Remember, anything you buy commercially has the potential to be nasty. They’re not the one consuming the food, so why should they care? Not like the government’s doing much otherwise anyway.

    You gotta make the food and drink yourself if you want perfection (or close to it).

  28. Floobtronics says:

    Here’s an idea… Don’t chug several Vitamin Waters a day.. You might as well drink soda.

    Get back onto plain old Dihydrogen Monoxide.

    It doesn’t have 150 calories per bottle. 2 or 3 of those a day is like eating a donut, calorically speaking.

  29. Munsoned says:

    That is pretty gross. I’m glad my New Year’s resolution was to not drink my calories–took myself off of all soda, gatorade, bottled teas, etc.

  30. mountaindew says:

    Yucks! (yes, plural)

  31. FreeMarketGravy says:

    @Voyou_Charmant: Exactly. It seems more gross because you can see it with your bare eyes, it has a tangible consistency and vaguely resembles genetic material, but everyone reading this has, does and will continue to ingest things far more disgusting than that glucose slug.

  32. Chaosium says:
  33. trujunglist says:

    My guess is that it’s a bacterial growth feeding off the glucose in the water. Since it’s mostly water with sugar and little else, I’d imagine that it’s essentially the perfect environment for growing mold, bacteria, or spores once it gets contaminated. Try it sometime, it produces shit that looks EXACTLY like this, and would undoubtedly make the drink taste like crap too (I am not in the habit of drinking blogs of cum-like bacteria, so I don’t know), which could explain why others here have had bad taste accompanying the giant blobs. If they were just glucose blobs then it probably would just taste like… glucose.

  34. A few weeks ago, I had left a bottle of formula 50 sitting out for few days on the counter. Didn’t think it would matter.
    When I went to drink it, it had something similar to this floating in the top. I didn’t realize it until I had already started drinking it. I freaked out because I thought it was mold, and spit it into the sink.

  35. The Bambino says:

    @Floobtronics:

    Might as well drink soda??
    Not even REMOTELY accurate.

  36. FLConsumer says:

    @trujunglist: I was thinking it was an external polysaccharide excreted by bacteria as well. I’ve never seen glucose form a slime layer, but have seen plenty of bacteria do so.

    Bottled water = yuck. There’s a reason soda and other drinks are acidic; it’s to keep the bacteria counts down. Can’t easily do that with water. ‘nuf said there.

    Reverse-osmosis & distillation will easily take care of any chemicals in the water.

  37. fencepost says:

    Odds are very high that it was something bacterial that started small and expanded. When bacteria split, they may or may not then separate; if they don’t then they’ll form either strands or sheets.

    You probably wouldn’t see as much in plain water because there’s less raw material to work with (nutrients, e.g. carbon & nitrogen in flavorings, etc.).

  38. aquanetta says:

    They should’ve charged extra for kombucha. Usually it’s fungus that makes slimy sheets.

  39. Floobtronics says:

    @The Bambino: Why is that? A can of soda contains roughly 150 calories. A bottle of vitamin water contains roughly 150 calories. Seems about the same, calorically. That’s just my math degree talking. Us mathematicians, we’re pretty good at spotting identical numbers.

    I stand by my statement, instead of drinking several vitamin waters a day, have a donut. Drink water and take a multivitamin. You’ll get your vitamins, you get hydrated, and you get a donut out of the deal, all for roughly the same caloric intake. Skip the donut, and you’re 300-500 calories ahead now.

    As an added bonus, you don’t have to wonder who left their bodily discharges in your drink.

  40. The Bambino says:

    @Floobtronics:

    Because despite what some people might think, a calorie is NOT a calorie. A can (12oz) of soda has 150 Kcal made up of almost all (35g) of high fructose corn syrup. A bottle (20oz) of vitamin water contains 35g of crystalline fructose, (which from my understanding is just a derivative of HFCS). As someone who consumes nearly 4000 Kcal per day and couldn’t be considered anywhere near overweight (5’9″ 195 lbs 9%BF) I have learned that a calorie is NOT a calorie, and for those trying to lose weight little changes in diet are huge. If I were to consume 4000 KCal in HFCS, transfats, and bleached flours I would likely have a much different body comp than I do now. I would certainly not advise anyone to drink either soda OR vitamin water, but if they must drink one, VW would be an obvious choice over soda just because its a lower calorie dense food, and the general public seems to have trouble deceiphering a simple food label.

    In other words, I DO agree with you calorically, but NOT practically.

  41. Mr. Damage says:

    It’s Formula 50, if you get my drift.

  42. ryucross says:

    Purchased a bottle of revive while at a gas station on a road trip today, had the same thing. Even if its just the congealed sugar, I ain’t drinking it.