Rebate Checks Start Arriving Monday!

Monday is your lucky day, taxpayer, that’s when rebate checks start arriving, ahead of schedule. That’s right, the rebates were originally slated for May 2nd, but thanks to “a new computer program that updates records daily – faster than an older program that updates weekly,” Americans will start getting their free beer money on April 28th. Wow, IRS and efficiency together in the same sentence?

Tax rebates to start arriving Monday [CNN Money] (Thanks to Caren!)
(Photo: MBru)

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  1. boxjockey68 says:

    “IRS and efficiency together in the same sentence”…….Now THAT was some funny funny reading, but I can hardly wait for MY beer money, straight to the bank it goes!

  2. Thaddeus says:

    And Right into the bank it will go.

    Sorry, US economy, get your stimulus from someone else.

  3. jjeeff says:

    Now I can pay for water at Dunkin Donuts!

  4. petrarch1608 says:

    you mean theu’ll be direct deposited?

  5. ganzhimself says:

    I’d like to see the “revised” schedule so I can know when I’ll have that sweet, sweet stimulus check so I can afford a tank of gas!

  6. BugMeNot2 says:

    Thanks to a new computer program? They’re not trying to thank George W. Bush on this why? Chimpeach FTW!

  7. BigElectricCat says:

    What kind of rate did the Chinese give us on the money our government is using for the “stimulus” payments?

  8. Zwitterion says:

    Free money…. Since when?

  9. Pro-Pain says:

    If it wasn’t for Bush we wouldn’t have this extra money. He’s the best President ever! I wish we could re-elect him for eight more years! Imagine total world domination! USA USA USA!!!

  10. MaliBoo Radley says:

    When will the direct deposits start??

  11. dabub says:

    I’m going to europe and spending my bush bucks there! I’ll be able to buy oh.. a whole half a beer with the current exchange rate!

  12. spinachdip says:

    @Thaddeus: Ah, but you’ll be providing liquidity, which the bank will use to extend loans! Resistance is futile! Unless you save or invest the money off-shore (traitor!).

    Or I guess you could stick the check under your mattress.

  13. Falconfire says:

    nice should be getting mine next week then if it goes by when you mailed it in

  14. MaliBoo Radley says:

    @Falconfire:
    It goes buy social security number, I believe. The last 2 digits I think.

  15. Kwik80 says:

    @radleyas:

    The original schedule had the first round of payments going out on May 2 for people who had Social Security numbers ending between 00 and 20, and then a new group every week (21-75 on May 9, and 76-99 on May 16), going by the article, I’m not sure if they’re just going to push everyone up a week, or do the first group on Monday, then the next on Tuesday and Wednesday, and the last group on Friday, or something like that. Note too that if you didn’t have your tax refund direct deposited, you still have to wait for a paper check (though they’ll be sending those out earlier than expected too)

  16. MaliBoo Radley says:

    @Kwik80:

    Cool beans. My regular refund was direct deposited.

    Now, whose SSN will it go by? My husband and I filed jointly. His name was first on the tax form. Will we get two checks, or one bigger one as a couple?

  17. ian937262 says:

    I’m going to give mine to Al-Qaeda.

  18. ian937262 says:

    @radleyas:
    They said it’s by who’s name is first. And it’ll be one big check if you filed jointly

  19. fuzzycuffs says:

    Won’t be getting one. I missed the cut off. :(

  20. Krobar says:

    @ian937262: Brilliant! I figured I’d just go the traditional route and keep buying gasoline for my car. :)

  21. Dustbunny says:

    We can haz picture of Tax Cat doing a happy dance at the news?

  22. puka_pai says:

    At least my personal economy will be stimulated. Our check goes from the IRS to the state to pay the property taxes on our house. One less bill to worry about, BFD.

  23. Balisong says:

    And I’m still going to get mine at the end of the line despite the fact that I filed early. Damn you SS numbers…damn you. I need to pay my med bills NOW >_<

  24. homerjay says:

    @Krobar: And by the time your check gets here it should just about cover your next tank of gas! Thanks Mr. President!

  25. twilightzone says:

    **fuzzycuffs I wouldn’t be too sure about that. Investigate that a bit more before you give up! Check out http://www.irs.gov/newsroom/article/0,,id=179181,00.html for some info. You just never know!! Good luck!

  26. twilightzone says:

    @fuzzycuffs: Don’t be so sure!! Depending on your situation, you may have until Oct to file. CHECK IT OUT!!! Good luck!!

  27. thelushie says:

    What am I doing with my money? Professional organization dues…and some new clothes and a couple pairs of shoes.

  28. B says:

    @spinachdip: I’m investing mine in gold. Nazi gold.

  29. Crazytree says:

    there are going to be a lot of happy strippers, whores and drug dealers next week.

  30. s3p5 says:

    I DIG HITLER

  31. s3p5 says:

    ‘S GOLD

  32. KD17 says:

    $500 to savings and $100 for fun is my plan.

  33. DrGirlfriend says:

    Most of mine is going to save for a down payment….but some of it will be paying off the last of my student loans.

    The heavens will part and a chorus of angels will harmoniously sing once I click on that “Make Payment” button for the last time.

  34. lefty_redhead says:

    @jjeeff: Hurt something LOL!!!

  35. Zombilina says:

    I get my money from the government, I put it in my Roth, it grows over the next forty years; I pay no tax. Therefore, in forty years the government has given me thousands of dollars. Hooray!

  36. katra says:

    I think I’ll put mine towards a bike. Seems like a better deal than a couple tanks of gas to me.

  37. aurf says:

    According to irs.gov I get mine on the 25th. In 30 minutes. Heck yea.

  38. Starfury says:

    I’d like to thank the US government for giving me money that will be given to the CA State government for my property taxes in November. The few hundred leftover will probably be eaten up by rising gas costs.

  39. Jevia says:

    Mine will go into the savings account to help pay bills if I still don’t have a job when unemployment runs out in a few months. I’d rather the government hire me.

  40. MercuryPDX says:

    @BugMeNot2: ROFLPMP.

    Thank you for Chimpeach. That just cast a small but effective ray of sunshine into my day.

    Mine is going right into savings until I need to take a hammer to the piggy bank.

  41. Trai_Dep says:

    I’m driving to Mexico, buying a magnum of Absolute and after passing it around a bit, we’re re-taking the South Western United States.
    Because Lou Dobbs looks a bit too well-rested for my liking.

  42. mac-phisto says:

    @Trai_Dep: meet you in tijuana. i’ll be blowing my economic stimulus package on well….just look for the gringo with a lap full of whores.

  43. catnapped says:

    Whoo-hoo! Should just about pay for a gallon of gas by the time I get mine!

  44. George Bush can bite my shiny metal ass. Since I just paid off my credit card, it goes toward my kid’s fall tuition payment.

  45. geekfather says:

    Mine’s going to Obama.

  46. tz says:

    I have a SSN toward the end, so I won’t be getting anything until July anyway. Maybe they can speed that up a bit too.

  47. Angryrider says:

    Mine stays in the bank.
    You know, if our government made better use of our tax money, we wouldn’t need these “stimulus” checks, and we’d financially be in a better shape.

  48. HOP says:

    wow, now i can get my gas tank half fulled, and also mow my lawn…..

  49. whatevernever says:

    I’m saving mine for when gas is $5 or $6 a gallon!

  50. theblackdog says:

    @DrGirlfriend: Congratulations. I still have a few years left to pay mine off.

    My check will pay for my upcoming car and renters insurance, then the rest is going to pay off the credit card.

  51. aikoto says:

    It’s going to eliminate a majority of the balance on my last credit card. Economic stimulus my butt.

  52. Daniel-Bham says:

    Summer Tuition ahoy!

  53. Pinget says:

    So Monday is when we get to start watching the stimulus money not really change anything at all?

  54. tamoko says:

    Car insurance for a year, and an Airport Extreme/Timecapsule to help backup all those important thesis papers, papers, and porn.

  55. tamoko says:

    @aikoto: Or perhaps your route… Screw stimulating the economy.

  56. BigElectricCat says:

    @Assimilation:

    Unless the Fair Tax Fairies have their way. Then those sweet, sweet untaxed Roth proceeds start to shrivel and turn sour.

  57. So is it $600 per taxpayer or $300? Qualifying kids add another $300? I read something on this but then heard contradictory accounts from people who talked to their (supposed)accountants.

    Harry “needs new roller skates” Wang

    Har!

  58. Orv says:

    @FiveStarEggRoll: There’s a calculator on the IRS website where you can figure the amount.

  59. @Orv: Cool. Thanks.

    Harry “wants my 900 smackers” Wang

  60. notallcompaniesareevil says:

    @BigElectricCat: Current 10 year bond yield is 3.85%

  61. trujunglist says:

    @mac-phisto:

    Let’s fuckin go man, wooOoOoOo! Consumerist stripper frenzy! We can meet up in Mission Valley, raid my office for “supplies,” and then head on down.

  62. PricklyPete says:

    I don’t qualify for a rebate. I hope those of you who don’t earn
    enough to pay taxes enjoy spending money that I (and other people with
    jobs) have paid into the system for you. Oh, and you’re welcome :)

  63. notallcompaniesareevil says:

    @PricklyPete: One of the hallmarks of the tax code is that it is progressive. On balance, that is the right way to run a government, I think. This is an extension of that.