Reader K’s call to Dell tech support for his laptop resulted in the tech helping him break a different computer, then sending him a replacement laptop full of human pubic hair. After diagnosing a faulty power adapter with K’s laptop, the Dell technician asked him to plug the malfunctioning adapter into his other, out-of-warranty Dell to confirm the problem. K was reluctant, but complied, and fried his old laptop in the process. To their credit, Dell offered a replacement; unfortunately, it had a full bush. Full email, with picture, below (photo is NSFL: Not Safe For Lunch).
So I rarely resort to complaints as I think I am an easygoing consumer, but this time Dell went over the line. Maybe I just needed to write this email to vent, but I think it may be worth a post on your site…
Recently my 1 year old Dell laptop stopped charging the battery, so I called technical support (still under 3 year warranty) to try to resolve the issue. The technician recommended trying to plug another Dell power adapter into the laptop to see if this was the problem, and surprisingly it worked – problem solved…send me a new power adapter and I’ll be on my way.
Unfortunately here things took bad turn. The technician thought that it would be a good idea to try the faulty power adapter in my other Dell laptop just to confirm that this was the problem. I told him that this laptop was no longer under warranty and that I didn’t really want to mess with anything else since we had already resolved the issue. He said that we had to confirm this before he could authorize a new adapter being sent to me. So I plug it in and ZAP! Burning smell, and my old laptop was fried – nothing could revive it. At this point I was worried the technician would hang up, but to their credit they stayed on the line and after about an hour finally agreed to replace my old laptop. At this point, I was rather satisfied despite all of the problems – I was getting a new replacement for my old laptop.
About a week later, I get my “new” Dell laptop. I open the case, and the instruction manual is bent out of shape, and I start to worry. I reach the bottom of the box, pull out the laptop, and first thing I see is the top is covered in scratches. Some people may say that I should be happy since I was getting a newer model laptop to replace an old laptop with no warranty. My old laptop, however, was in great condition. When I opened up the new laptop, I saw the screen was scratched and dirty, and the keyboard was covered in debris. Wait, not debris….what is that? HAIRS!? Not just any hairs – these could only be described as pubes. I hate to be so crude, but pubes are pubes. Not the incidental curly hair, but rather mini-tufts between the keys. My only guess is that Ron Jeremy was the previous owner. At this point, I called Dell back, and I have written this email in between talking to 3 different people and over an hour of hold time. Nobody wants to help, and I’m reached the limits of my tolerance for poor service.
At this point, I’m considering 3 options:
1. Vacuum it, douse it in alcohol, and just try to use it and forget about “the hedgehog”
2. Sell it and buy a new laptop
3. Go to the gym, run 3 miles, trim body hair directly over the keyboard, send laptop back to dell (this is the cleaned up version)
Any other ideas?
Well, although Dell may not be listening to Executive Email Carpet Bombs anymore, it doesn’t hurt to try. Here is a bunch of Dell email addresses, here are some more, and here is one more. Include pictures of the fuzz factory in your email, hopefully it will gross someone out enough to get you a replacement.
(“Free Human Hair” Photo: Kevin Dean)
More From Consumerist
-
Computer That Touches Itself Comes Back From Dell In Worse Shape, Michael Dell Swoops In
-
Laptop Owner Stuck In Dell Hell While Waiting For Refund
-
Dell Really Doesn’t Want To Sell You A French Keyboard, Marks It Up $999,999.99
-
Dell Tech Support Really More Of An Upsell Trap
-
Cast Into Alienware’s Dell Hell, Not Sure Why
@boss_lady: not really, I just wanted to embrace that theory so I’d be able to keep down my lunch. I have a refurbished dell laptop.
I can’t believe nobody’s made an Eric Cartman reference yet. Scott Tinnerman must work for Dell.
I would never buy nor settle for anything refurbished that one puts one hands or fingers on.
To me, using any refurbished item is about the same as buying a used mattress.
When I go to hotels, I always bring with me a 4 x ( fooy sheet of marine plywood, place it atop the bedspread and sleep on the plywood. I refuse to use toilet seats and, instead, use the bathroom sinks.
I think that I have found the previous owner.
So Robin Williams repairs computers now.
Perhaps Dell has acquired Anus Laptops?
I am pretty sure Dell is the worst company ever when dealing with Laptops.
They “fixed” by LCD screen problem by creating new cracks in it.
Uugh. F*ck dell.
Have you tried picking at it to make sure it really is pubes? Could be animal hair =D
Technically the laptop would be kinkier without any pubic hair.
How could the technician have said he wouldn’t authorize a new power adaptor being sent to you unless you tested the faulty one on your other laptop? What if you didn’t happen to have another Dell laptop?? That is so ridiculous…
“What if you didn’t happen to have another Dell laptop??”
Then you do what millions of other users do every day. Do nothing and claim it still doesn’t work. Is the tech watching you plug in and remove things? How does he know if you even tried it or not?
Okay, so there’s some room for doubt that it’s pubic hair. True that it could be some other kind of hair.
Why are so many people missing the point that the individual received a laptop that was covered in some kind of hair? Regardless of what KIND it is, it’s just unsanitary.
If this guy received a bowl of soup somewhere that had hair floating on the top, would you folks be as inclined to debate just what kind of hair it could be?
@eakolb: True, but if the headline just said that the laptop had “some kind of hair” in it, it wouldn’t generate nearly as many clicks as calling them pubes.
I haven’t read all of the comments to see if someone else thought of this… But it’s likely they used an air compressor to try and “clean it up”.
The funny thing is, a lot of times when you try and blow out a keyboard, you only make it worse by revealing all the nasties that are hidden under the keys.
It will blow all of the crap out from under the keys and get it stuck in the cracks where it’s plainly visible (just like what you have pictured).
They obviously sent you a refurbished laptop (dell doesn’t replace anything with new parts… every replacement part is refurbished), and at some point they blew it off to try and make it look clean, but it was probably on some sort of assembly line, so the person with the air compressor probably only had 5 seconds with it, not enough time to really clean it.
Not defending dell, I’m just guessing that’s probably what happened. The whole replacement with refurbished parts is why I don’t buy dells anymore.
JUST returned the second dell laptop I have owned. The first one crashed on me, so I decided to give it a second shot. A WEEK after having the second one, it crashed as well. They tried to send me a new hard drive and have me install it myself. I did, and guess what? Yep, that didn’t work either! Only took about 5 cumulative hours on the phone with customer service in another country for them to authorize a return. DELL…NEVER AGAIN!!!!!! WORST COMPUTERS EVER.
Really? You got a replacement laptop with pubes in the keys? The only problem is verifying that this actually happened.
he NEEDS to confirm its the power cord?
what if you didnt have another laptop, how would he confirm it? sounds like hes a money retention specialist and wasnt going to get a bonus if he sent out a new cord.
I just could not pass this up I just had to post a comment regarding the poor service customers are getting these days. Maybe this is why Dell is closeing down here in the States and moving over seas where there are no controls. All those people who will be losing their jobs in the name of money and not service. Who really cares about the spelling or what type of hair. The point is Poor service. I have been a Dell Certified Technician for a long time. And I would never and that is NEVER let a computer, or laptop go back to one of my Customers in such condition. Just goes to show on where service has gone. Anyone who would do this is the cause of some the problems in the world.
Poor judgement and lack of training is showing up everwhere.
Now I feel better!
At the risk of sounding too defensive, there’s a good chance that those aren’t pubes. Look at your knuckles.
Your knuckles spend a lot more time near the keyboard than your genitals, no matter how much you love the internet porn.
Still a dirty computer. You have a right to be upset. But pubes? Probably not.
Get a Mac dude! How much does it take for people to put up with (crappy customer support and a sh!tty OS to boot)! No sympathy for you people who use Smell’s and Borg-ware.
@BugMeNot2:
Exactly!!! I just switched to Mac from PC. It was the best descision i ever made!
A month ago i purchased a dell XPS M 1530 no problems what so ever except time warner’s road runner .
As far as hair can we say the media if the eecb does not work and mention that as next step if they ignore you.
And the o.s. debate get Ubuntu / Linux
free and better than vista
Those hairs look like African-American head and/or arm hairs. Not, pubic hairs per se.
Also, I have a very curly haired cat. She is a Cornish Rex. Her hair is short, lush and curly. They are a very unusual breed of cat. My keyboard sometimes resembles that, but with her gray hair.
Well, the only solution to this problem is to find the guy who left the pubes, kill his parents, make chili out of them, and trick him into eating it while Radiohead makes fun of him. Problem solved!