—>We took a look at the big three burger joints—McDonald's, Wendy's and Burger King to locate the most butt-blimping, ass-widening, delicious-but-probably-not-worth-it fast food burgers we could find from a top national chain.

Here are our criteria:

• Had to be from a top nationwide burger chain.
• Had to be on the regular menu.
• Had to be a burger. No chicken.

Special Awards:

Most Ominous New Burger: McDonald's 1/3 Angus Deluxe with Bacon has 860 calories, but isn't available everywhere yet. When it's nationwide, it'll bump the Baconator™ off the top 5.

Some Burgers With Fewer Calories:

A WHOPPER JR.® has 370 calories. You could eat 3 full WHOPPER JR.® sandwiches (bun and toppings and mayo) and it would still be less calories than the TRIPLE WHOPPER® with cheese. A Wendy's Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger has 310 calories. [ed. note—In the interest of fairness, a friend who recently ate one says that the Baconator™ is significantly more delicious than the 2.6 Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers he could eat for the same calories.]

Best Name for A Butt-Blimping Burger:

Baconator™, duh.

Wendy's
McDonald's
BK

(Photo:MortonFox)