Warning: Those Breast Implants Do Not Come With An Extended Warranty

Thinking about buying yourself some new boobs? You might want to make sure you can handle the after effects. The NYT informs that breast augmentation doesn’t always involve a single surgery and there’s no warranty on your boobs. In fact, one third of women who get breast implants end up having another surgery within four to five years.

Why?

…with such high rates of reoperation, a new debate is emerging over whether breast implants constitute the kind of annuity medicine that will entail regular surgical tuneups, exposing patients to increased medical risk and out-of-pocket expenses. At a time when manufacturers have provided the F.D.A. with clinical studies that follow patients for just a few years, there is no established medical consensus on how long implants last, leaving doctors to rely on their anecdotal experiences when discussing durability with patients.

Given the lack of such data, critics said, women may not be prepared in the long term for the ordeal or financial burden of subsequent surgery.

Eek. And then there’s this:

Many women are aware that implants can break down over time, requiring replacement just like car tires.

Car tires? Really? At least you don’t have to get them rotated.

Do My Breast Implants Have a Warranty?[NYT]
(Photo:Amaranth Productions)

Comments

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  1. mantari says:

    In before “CHARGEBACK!!!”

  2. The Great Aussie Evil says:

    So what, change your boobs every 5 years or 10,000 miles?

  3. AD8BC says:

    Rotate? Car tires?

    My car tires rotate every day, lots of times….

    I wonder if you paid with Visa if they would double the manufacturers warranty on the implants…

  4. Juliekins says:

    Wow…exposure to anesthesia, potential scarring and malformation, AND I’ll probably have to get “tune-up” surgeries?

    You also say it’s not covered by insurance or any kind of warranty???

    HELLS YEAH. I wonder if my boss will let me off work this afternoon to go get me some new boobies. I can’t see a downside.

  5. bobpence says:

    Okay, so if I use a penny to check the treadwear on tires, do I use an LP to check cleavage?

  6. The Great Aussie Evil says:

    Nah, just look for the wear lines.

  7. PropCulture says:

    To be fair, some women get implants after cancer treatments. In cases like that, you’d think some sort of “warranty” would be available.

  8. Coder4Life says:

    But they are fun…

  9. AD8BC says:

    You know… if they could install some Zerk fittings under the breasts, they could at least re-grease the implants without major surgery.

    Or, instead of dangerous silicone, they could be filled with air… and you could install valve stems on the breasts… want them bigger? Just stop by a gas station, drop a quarter into the compressor….. make sure you keep a tire guage with you at all times!

  10. quiksilver says:

    @ad8bc: Yeah, I was wondering the same thing about Visa extending the warranty. But if they don’t come with a warranty….

  11. RandoX says:

    Come on, is that really the best picture we could come up with?

  12. shadow735 says:

    Wear depends oh how often they are squeeezed.

  13. qwickone says:

    @bobpence: you just made my day

  14. qwickone says:

    @PropCulture: well that doesnt really make sense since the product is essentially the same. either all of them need warranties or none of them. i dont think the reason should dictate a warranty.

  15. m4ximusprim3 says:

    Maybe I can start a smog-check type place for breastses.

    “Check one and get the second free!”
    “Mother Daughter discounts!”

  16. Rectilinear Propagation says:

    That photo is kinda horrifying.

  17. yagisencho says:

    There’s nothing like free-roaming silicon to trigger tumor growth!

    Please, for your physical health and the emotional health of those who love you, DO NOT have silicon gel electively inserted into your body. Your body shape does not define who you are.

  18. The Big O says:

    @m4ximusprim3: Mother daughter discounts….bwahahahahahahaha!

  19. cerbie says:

    @mantari: best laugh all day!

    “within four to five years” <- Dept. of redundancy Dept.?
    Are [0, 4] and [4, 5] all between [0, 5]? Yes.
    So, why not, “within five years?”

  20. Negative says:

    I love fake boobs! If I could I’d buy them for every woman that wanted a pair.

    (I better open my sh**storm-of-hate umbrella.)

  21. Negative says:

    I love fake boobs! I’d buy them for every woman that wanted them if I could.

    (I better open my sh**storm-of-hate umbrella.)

  22. zundian says:

    @ad8bc: I think with the saline implants they have such a thing. It’s not a standard feature, but I could have sworn that there’s a stripper/porn star that has a little valve where she can add/subtract water to/from her implants.

  23. kpfeif says:

    A friend just had implants early this past fall. Now that silicone are back on the market (with no solid evidence to show they cause health problems) it should alleviate some of the problems with saline implants. She chose the silicone because of this.

  24. SJActress says:

    I have natural double D’s. I want them smaller! I can’t believe people actually get foreign bodies implanted in them. It’s weird.

  25. julianazor says:

    Most women don’t realize this. If you are going to have ANY form of augmentation on your body (or any other work) — you should inform yourself. Breast implants should be changed every 10 years. If you don’t realize this, then you clearly aren’t informed enough to even go under the knife.

  26. thatgirlinnewyork says:

    Ain’t nothin’ like the real thing, baby!

  27. dothisforaliving says:

    First of all, both Mentor and Allergan (the 2 major manufacturers in the US) offer a LIFETIME warranty that pays for the IMPLANTS (not the surgery, but the implant(s))if they EVER rupture. I’m a plastic surgeon, and every patient (at least of mine) is well informed before they get this (or any) operation. The numbers are deceptively high (at least from my 10-year career) with regard to revisions, but everyone is told of the risks. The revision numbers are definitely higher for reconstruction (after cancer) surgery. If you don’t want “foreign bodies” inserted in you, definitely do not have the surgery. If you do not mind, consider the risks/benefits and decide for yourself.

  28. weggles90 says:

    There are so many “cons” to getting a boob job, and I personally thing fake/overly large boobs are ugly. It’s usually really obvious you got them, and thy look/feel off. Save your money people, don’t be so shallow.