Joe Ellis arranged for Santa to deliver an iPod to his daughter for Christmas. Santa instead left an anti-capitalist rant. The iPod purchased from a Maryland Walmart contained a note written in ransom-letter caps reading:
RECLAIM YOUR MIND FROM THE MEDIA SHACKLES. READ A BOOK AND RESURRECT YOURSELF.
TO CLAIM YOUR CAPITALISTIC GARBAGE GO TO YOUR NEAREST APPLE STORE.
Hold on. What about those faux-RIAA reminders that downloading music is communism? If the content is communism and the player is capitalist garbage, wouldn’t the combination even out? Besides, the iPods themselves don’t support any particular ideology—what stops you from subscribing to the Marx-Engels Proletariat Podcast? Right, nothing. These shopdroppers need to reconsider their message.
The little girl who expected a Christmas iPod was undoubtedly confused. Her father returned the iPod to the Germantown Walmart, where he learned that “another customer returned an iPod with a similar issue.” MyFoxKC doesn’t mention whether Walmart exchanged the political rant for a real iPod. You know those pesky capitalists, always so distrustful.