UPDATE: Verizon And Helio Are The Coolest Cellphone Company!
According to Google, Verizon is the coolest cellphone company. When you query "____ is cool," filling in the name of different providers, Verizon is tits. Here's how many results were returned for each company:
Alltel: 1
T-Mobile: 4
AT&T: 5
Sprint: 7
~ Verizon: 8 ~
UPDATE: Oh yeah, and Helio. They got 8 too! It's a tie!
We propose that henceforth, all companies interested in gauging their market penetration should subject themselves to the "is cool" test.
By way of comparison, "Apple is cool" returns 11,700 results, beating "Jesus is cool" at 10,700. Ergo, Apple is cooler than Jesus. But Apple is not cooler than cats. Cats win, at 20,200. We, however, are not cool at all. "Consumerist.com is cool" did not match any documents.
(Photo: Maulleigh)
This is a test using rich text formatting and html links. It's the generic "company" ad that should appear on all posts with the Company category if they don't have an ad attached to a specific company.
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Comments:
"Cingular is cool" : 2,180 Results
And they went with the AT&T Name...
I demand a recount.
This is what you do with your time, huh? :)
"Verizon is tits"
a bit of a non sequitur ben.
Nextel ties with sprint at 7
Actually, now it returns exactly 1 result: this article.
Which means you're only 3 behind "Armpit hair."
This article has been indexed now, increasing Apple, Jesus, and consumerist.com by 1.
I think you guys are cool...
So Verizon is best due to Google?
hmmmm
"Cool is cool" 13,100
"Ice is cool" 914
"Global Warming is cool" 11,900
"Death is cool" 53,000
I've been thinking about switching to Verizon. Sprint is much too expensive for me.
3,300 for "saddam is cool."
Maybe we shouldn't have bombed him after all.
1,810,000 for "pelicans are cool."
This is fun! Even tiny U.S. Cellular manages to eke out lame Alltel with 2 -- although they're both from the same site, so let's call it a draw.
@Sathallrin: I only get 13 results for "cingular is cool" (including your comment as the first result). Still, that makes Cingular the big winner in this rodeo.
Verizon sucks balls
lol 16,000 hits for Verizon Sucks.
For Google results on best and worst presidential candidate 'best presidential candidate' 'worst...you get the idea'
[onlinesaleschannels.wordpress.com]
So Alltel was a Google-whack? That's pretty cool in and of itself!
1,020,000 for AT&T sucks.
But ok, to be fair.... 22,500 for "at&t sucks".
31,000 for "sprint sucks"
Verizon still wins among the big guys.
"helio is cool" gets 9 results :D I love my Ocean.
"i am cool" returns around 356,000 results. clearly i win.
hmmm
"Once Was Cool" 38,200
@Sathallrin: Odd...when I did the same search, I got 11 results (18 with duplicate items not omitted). Which version of Google are you using?
Microsoft is cool gets 33,900 therefore Microsoft is cooler then Apple.
Not a very scientific test. One of the Verizon hits actually says "... I don't think Verizon is cool."
Not to mention, as soon as Google indexes this article, these counts will all change, anyway. What's that principle about the very act of observation changes the result of the test?
Cats is cool?
But who is the coolest Consumerist?
"Ben is cool" - 21,200
"Meghann is cool" - 0 (ha)
"Carey is cool" - 30
"Chris is cool" - 524
The coolest Consumerist is Ben, by a long shot.
Oh dear.
"My purple cock is cool" gets 121,000 hits.
While not sleek, state-of-the-art or possessing a Touch interface, I'm pretty proud of my lil' blood-gorged Mr. Happy beating Apple. Best, it lasts longer than 500 charge cycles!
Err, about the Touch interface. I just reread the owner's manual. It does come with one!
@kingoman: that, sir, is the observer effect: [en.wikipedia.org]
ive always been taught that it was the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, but wikipedia says that that is incorrect.
side note: "heisenberg is cool" returns 1 result. and the results arent all exactly relevant. one of them is a discussion of a song in a commercial which yields this comment: "HATEBREED = VERIZON SO VERIZON IS COOL !" which was made sarcastically, but oh well.
...*Thank* you for the wonderful imagery.
@Johnny:
@The Bigger Unit:
That is odd when I do a search here:
[www.google.com]
I get this:
Results 1 - 10 of about 2,100 for "cingular is cool". (0.07 seconds)
Yet when I actually look at the results there are 14 (including 2 from consumerist) So not sure what is bugged about google, I tried the search on multiple browsers, logged in and not logged in and got the same result.
Either way, this is till more than verizon.
verizon is ok, if you want to pay extra to have certain features enabled on your cell phone. If they already offer a service (for a fee) and your phone is capable of doing it, they lock the phone and force you to pay for their service.
For example, the Motorola Razr on the Verizon network does not have the ability to use custom (DIY) ring tones, whereas this same phone on any other network does.
Did you just take a picture with your phone? Well, if you're a verizon wireless customer, you won't just be able to plug your phone into your computer via the USB port to download the picture.
@RumorsDaily:
The coolest Consumerist is Ben, by a long shot.
Yes but, with all props to Popken, they could have been talking about any Ben...
Ben Franklin, Ben Stiller, Ben Dover...
Your search - "Ben Popken is cool" - did not match any documents.
@Brad2723:
Actually, you can downlowd pics to your pc if you buy the "verizon music" package or whatever garbage that is, that comes with the usb cable. You need to install the driver from the cd included in the package. Once your phone is talking to your PC, go to www.bitpim.org and download the software. You can now move pictures to your PC easily. I do it all the time with a samsung a990. This works with most verizon phones. (Even if your phone isn't "listed" on bitpim, try it anyway - it'll probably work.)
google search for "consumerist is cool" returns:
"Did you mean: "consumerism is cool"?"
No. No I didn't.