Walmart "Stalking" T-shirt Angers Stalking Victim
A stalking victim that has found she has little legal recourse against her harasser due to North Carolina's weak laws is angry at Walmart for selling a T-shirt that makes light of stalking.
The t-shirt reads: "Some call it stalking, I call it 'love'."
The Raleigh News&Observer says:
For the past two years, this woman has been stalked until she feels like a prisoner in her own life. She has been spied upon, bullied and threatened with her life.Wow, that's depressing. We feel really bad for this woman and hope North Carolina's government wakes up and realizes that stalking is a crime...She has been in frequent communication with local authorities. Yet, because North Carolina has one of the most vague stalking laws in the nation (a bill is wending its way through the legislature to address that), her recourse has been limited.
So when she saw the T-shirts, clearly aimed for the teen-younger adult set, she didn't see the humor.
"It's reprehensible," said the woman, whose story is well documented but who asked not to be identified for fear that her stalker might retaliate.
"People don't realize how serious stalking is," she said. "You constantly live in fear, look over your shoulder and suffer from psychological and physical symptoms due to the stress of the stalker."
She wondered aloud: What's next?"Some say it's rape, I call it hot sex"? Or: "Some call it domestic violence, I say I'm just teaching her a lesson"?
...Then again, she should remember that she's complaining about a t-shirt sold by an organization that was subject to an FBI investigation for (allegedly) wiretapping reporters. Now we understand. It was just love.
T-shirt isn't funny to stalking victims [Raleigh News & Observer] (Thanks, David!)
(Photo:Raleigh News & Observer)
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Comments:
*yawn*
So just because you're the victim of a stalker, no one in America should be able to make fun of stalking?
When did America become filled with such entitled, whiny busybodies who think that their "right" not to be offended trumps everyone's freedom of speech?
[b]If you don't like it, DON'T BUY IT.[/b]
What is really sad and/or disgusting is that many stalkers SEE their behavior in a distorted way from their end. Some of these people see their behavior as normal pursuit of a relationship because they are that out of touch with reality.
I'm sure most stalker types shop at Walmart anyway. Maybe this was just a way to put warning signs on the screwed up members of society. Or just typical Walmart patriarchal bullshit.
Anything funny or humorous generally makes light of someone else's unfortunate situation. Get over it retard.
Also, typically, states in the south allow you to shoot someone on your property or in your house who you believe is threatening your life. Buy a gun and shoot the guy next time he sets foot on your protery. In other words, do something about it, or STFU.
She may not like it but it's legal for the shirts to be sold under the First Amendment. You do not have the right to not be offended. I've seen things I don't like much, myself, but I recognize that we must have the freedom of speech if we are going to preserve some semblance of the society our founders intended, and so I am willing to be offended from time to time because I feel that to be important.
Too bad some people are too shortsighted to do the same and only think of themselves as they whine to the press -- which is protected by the very same laws that protect those who make and sell such shirts.
I think Televiper had a great point in pointing out Wal*Mart has a history of censorship but then sells something like this...
As far as this lady is concerned, it's too bad she's being stalked, she should hire someone to resolve the situation since North Carolina apparently can't help her. It's a t-shirt, and to echo the above comments. Get over it, this country needs to lighten up a bit.
@EtherealStrife: Stalking is extremely hostile and often ends in rape and/or murder. The people who would buy this T-shirt from a place like T-Shirt Hell would more than often have the sense not to wear in a place like Wal*Mart. What's really said is Wal*Mart is the place that forces record companies to bleep out their albums and censor even lightly offensive material. Stalking is a serious social ill and this woman is having her life taken away because of it. She should NOT have to resort to murdering someone to live peaceful. The sick irony is her stalker probably justifies all his actions through believing it's all out of love.
@Televiper: Count me among those with a bit of sense about my rather large collection of shirts from TShirtHell. I reserve the extra rude shirts to wear to Austin on a Friday night, where they'll be given the love and respect they so richly deserve. So, no, I won't wear my White Flour shirt to the grocery store...
That's a very good point about the "sanitized" audio CD's, but they'll sell this shirt like they don't understand how it may offend someone. WalMarx wants to Nanny, but apparently only just so much.
I don't think one person's sensitivity to an issue makes it "bad form" to joke about it. But, as other commenters have stated Walmart is known for censorship, among other things, that are "un-american" (imho). The Charlotte paper is the Charlotte Observer. The Raleigh paper is the News and Observer. Confusing but, I know how important the details are to readers of consumerist.com :)
I agree that the woman in question has no right to expect to never be offended. The world is not her personal "safe space". Her real complaint is with the local police and NC's laws.
I do also think it's a tasteless shirt and not something I'd expect WalMart to carry. Are they actively going after the Hot Topic crowd now?
Ah tell her to shut up. Some people have a different sense of humor than others. If someone finds that funny should they not be allowed to wear it because it offends someone? Come on I mean if we got rid of everything offensive what would we be left with? Im offended by assholes but I cant sue them for it.
@Buran: Having the legal right to do something doesn't necessarily mean it's a good idea to, and the commenters who say "Shop somewhere else" are missing the point.
I generally err on the side of the right to free expression and tastelessness because I'm a fan of free expression and tasteless humor. But as other commenters have noted, Wal-Mart, prides itself on squeaky clean, and is not shy about taking objectional music and magazines off the shelves.
So either Wal-Mart isn't serious about upholding its values or it thinks the callous view of stalking (and by extension, domestic violence) is perfectly within its wholesome value set.
This isn't so much about right or wrong, as it is about how Wal-Mart wants to be perceived, and the disconnect between their wholesome image and reality.
@spinachdip: Or maybe it just doesn't agree that the people who are complaining have it right. Much as we may not like Wal-Mart as a collective here, but that's their right.
So yes, the people who say "shop elsewhere" do have it right.
Let me see if I can explain this better:
I think most reasonable can agree that the shirt is, if not offensive, at least in poor taste. Which is fine, I say a lot of tasteless shit when I'm in appropriate company. But one thing is clear - the shirt is funny precisely because it's tasteless. In short, it's designed to offend, and it would be disingenuous to argue otherwise.
I think most reasonable people can also agree that Wal-Mart projects a wholesome image, and it makes a point of sanitizing music and covering up magazine covers. Wal-Mart has gone out of way to position itself as a place where families can shop without finding anything that's remotely objectionable.
Now, "wholesome" and "tasteless" are inherently incompatible. So the question is no longer about where this lady should shop for unhealthily underpriced goods, but what exactly Wal-Mart's values are, and what our expectations should be.
It's only stalking once you cross state lines. Some people need to just lighten up =)
Anyhoo, it does seem hypocritical for a so-called socially conscious retailer to sell this, yet carry censored music that has similar messages. Then again, it does seem like there are merchandise buyers within the company that aren't communicating.
@cindel: Because people who take these things seriously are stupid, and they themselves should not be taken seriously. That is all.
@Televiper: It wouldn't be murder, it'd be self-defense. While I agree she shouldn't have to kill anybody I hope that doesn't stop her from arming herself because it sounds like she might have to stop him herself. (Maybe the stalkers getting killed will make them change the laws since the stalking victims getting killed isn't enough motivation.)
As for the t-shirt it's out of line for Wal-mart but in general isn't as bad as other t-shirts.
"Some say it's rape, I call it hot sex"? Or: "Some call it domestic violence, I say I'm just teaching her a lesson"?
We make fun of people who die in stupid ways and award them for taking themselves out of the gene pool. If the Darwin Awards people can publish books making fun of specific people because of how died you aren't going to stop anyone from making jokes about rape and domestic violence.
@Shadowfire: People who call people with different priorities stupid are stupider.
Besides, the true issue with the Nazi shirts isn't whether it's offensive or not. Once Wal-Mart agreed that they were in poor taste and promised that they'd be taken off the shelves, that became a moot point. The problem was that they didn't follow through on their promise.
That tells us that
a) Wal-Mart corporate are a bunch of liars who don't do what they promise to do
and/or
b) Wal-Mart corporate has so little institutional control that they can't even get a simple instruction out to stores, and makes you wonder if they can get recalled products off the shelves in a timely manner
Either way, it affects all Wal-Mart shoppers.
Listen guys, I recently had someone send me a very rude e-mail, now I must insist you all stop using the internet. If people really knew how dangerous and threatening the internet can be they'd all stop. I can't believe the public media let's companies ADVERTISE internet service......... get over it people.
Guys, I have to say that I'm really disturbed by a lot of the comments on this thread. Fortunately a few people who have common sense have flagged some of the more egregious comments.
Stalking is not some sort of innocent, harmless thing -- and when it escalates to violent and deadly behavior, people ask, "Why didn't anyone do anything about [the stalker] before things got out of hand?" This woman spoke up, and many of you guys are castigating her for that.
I'm disappointed in the cavalier attitudes I'm seeing about the issue, and I'm horrified at the number of people who tell her to "suck it up."
If I went with my gut and swung the banhammer at those comments, many of the people on this thread would be gone.
@Consumerist Moderator - ACAMBRAS: "Guys, I have to say that I'm really disturbed by a lot of the comments... Stalking is not some sort of innocent, harmless thing... number of people who tell her to suck it up..."
think you missed the point. people's comments are simply the equal and opposite reaction to her action.















They're gonna call it arson, I'm thinking of it as an old fashioned spiritual cleansing.