Step 1) Locate olive oil aisle.
Step 2) Attempt to open olive oil. Fail.
Step 3) Come back in a few minutes.
Step 4) Open a new bottle of olive oil, pour it on the floor.
Step 5) Come back in a few minutes. Pretend to fall.
You guys can fill in the rest of the steps, just make sure to include “wait for paramedics.”