According to the Washington Post, Judge Roy “Fancy Pants” Pearson cried when he recalled the moment he was handed the wrong pants by a DC dry cleaner. You’ll recall that Pearson is suing the dry cleaner for $54 million dollars, alleging signs reading “Satisfaction Guaranteed” and “Same Day Service” constituted consumer fraud. From the Washington Post:
“Never before in recorded history have a group of defendants engaged in such misleading and unfair business practices,” Pearson said in his opening statement. You don’t get a lot of firsts in recorded history in D.C. Superior Court, though I should add that Marion Barry was in the building for his day in traffic court, and the pants suit easily outdrew the ex-mayor-for-life.
It gets better. One of Fancy Pants Pearson’s witnesses testified, comparing the Mom and Pop dry cleaner to Nazi Germany:
“At 89, I’m not ready to be chased,” she said. “But I was in World War II as a WAC, so I think I can take care of myself. Having lived in Germany and knowing the people who were victims of the Nazis, I thought he was going to beat me up. I thought of what Hitler had done to thousands of Jews.”
Wait. It gets better.
Pearson paused. He struggled to breathe deeply. He could not continue. Pearson blurted a request for a break, stood up, turned around and walked out of the courtroom, tears dripping from his full and reddened eyes.
When he returned, he called that moment when Chung offered him the wrong pants “a Twilight Zone experience,” and again, he welled up and had to halt the proceedings. Pearson wanted to submit the remainder of his testimony in writing, but Judge Bartnoff wouldn’t hear of it.
Wait, we can’t take it anymore, it’s too funny. You’ll have to read the rest on your own.—MEGHANN MARCO
Judge Who Seeks Millions for Lost Pants Has His (Emotional) Day in Court [Washington Post]
(Photo: Inside Edition)
Must be some pair of pants!!
@mackjaz: And all this time, we don’t even know what kind of pants they were.
.
@oldhat: @PKnel: No you fool, they want to “reform” to protect corporations from getting their asses handed to them after getting sued for honest, legitimate reasons by good people.
You nailed it. Tort reform is a sham. No one thinks lawsuits like this are a good idea, but it’s no excuse for removing one of the few protections that consumers have.
@asherchang, @Papa Midnight: In the second quote listed above, they compare Hitler and Nazi Germany to the pain he thinks this dry-cleaning mistake caused him.
The pants in question were from a blue and maroon suit. The dry cleaner didn’t commit a crime in losing the pants; they did the judge a favor.
HA! Pearson’s witness Godwin’d the trial!
Can we give Roy a Daytime Emmy and call it a day?
@Kloud: They were the pants to a Hickey Freeman suit. Depending on cut/material, the suit would be about $1000-$2000 to replace.
Hey, Pearson claims to be a consumer advocate since $51M will be reserved to help other DC residents fight similar injustices. He is only claiming $3M for his legal costs and personal damages.
I had hoped, and I suppose a part of me still does, that the Mr. Fancy Pants (brilliant name, btw) is of completely sound mind and body. You see, in my fantasy world, he fully recognizes the absurdity of his actions, and is using them to demonsrate just how desperately the court system in this country needs changing. He is a hero – yes, that’s right, a hero! – for being so willing to throw himself on his sword (as he will almost certainly lose his job when all is said and done) just to prove his point. Bravo, sir. Bra. Vo.
Or he’s completely bat-shit insane and should be locked up in a small rubber room while the Chungs light his pants on fire in front of a paying audiance.
Could go either way.
On a completely different note, there’s a huge piece of information in that article which we have all clearly overlooked.
“The courtroom was packed with members of the Korean Dry Cleaners Association”
There’s a KDCA? Seriously? Wow.
Never, never, ever, ever, ever, get between a judge and his pants.
If he wins, I’m going to start going to all the dry cleaners down here in Florida in the hopes of getting the wrong pants back.
I’ll settle for way less out of court 1 million…I’ll be rich!!! [evil laugh]
“And Pearson, who by his account has spent more than 1,400 hours preparing his case…
Pearson has reduced his claim to $54 million. But he told the judge that he also wants to be awarded attorney’s fees, even though he represents himself. He would like to be paid at a rate of between $390 and $425 an hour.”
1,400 x $400 = $560,000
What a fucking douche….
@Brilluminati: “Never, never, ever, ever, ever, get between a judge and his pants.”
Unless you are a hooker.
@faust1200: On what fucking planet is this guy a judge?
Planet DC, home of the Marion Barry Exam for Public Service.
@asherchang:
I guess Godwin’s Law now applies to the courts as well as the internets.
This guy is F’in looney. This is just so mind boggling, however, I thought in civil cases everybody gets their day in court–insane or not. I sat on the jury in a civil trial that was just about on par with this one…smaller dollar amounts though…what a waste of a week.
I love the Nazi comment follow up in the Washington Post article:
“An 89-year-old woman in a wheelchair told of being chased out of the cleaners by an angry owner… She compared the owners of Custom Cleaners in open court to Nazis.
‘I knew it: It’s all my fault,’ said the reporter from German television.”
I hope they shove those pants right up that judge’s ass.
Imagine if this Fruit wins the case? HA!
How on earth did this guy get to become a judge? Is the system that F’d up?
The judge is letting this move forward as a matter of procedure. All that is required to go to trial is a charge with “some” evidence to back it up. The charge here is that the dry cleaner is committing fraud when they say “100% satisfaction.” On that issue, the plaintiff may have a point. If a company says 100% Guarantee, must they stand by it, even if the complaint is ridiculous?
Now the amount he is seeking in damages is irrelevant. Yes the plaintiff is being a tool, but the damages will be awarded by the judge or the jury, depending on the state. The dry cleaner could be at fault here since appearantly they don’t guarantee 100% satisfaction, regardless of what the sign says. I think it is the amount in damages that is being sought, which has everyone laughing. The guy may entitled to $100 for his troubles, and the dry cleaner should be fined if they are indeed misleading customers. But that is all that should and will happen.
All I know is there’s no way this isn’t the True Stella Awards winner for 2007. I can’t imagine another lawsuit being this insane.
I’m actually anxiously awaiting their writeup of the case. (www.truestellaawards.com if anybody is interested)
This case is insane for one reason only:
Judges, like tollbooth workers and news reporters, don’t wear pants!
@noopinion:
It’s about principle? So if a company burns your burger, messes up your haircut or loses a pair of your pants, that allows you to totally destroy their whole family’s means of support and their lives as well? Puh-LEASE! You are entitled to a replacement, and that’s IT! This whole county needs a damn wakeup call. The world doesn’t revolve around you, you don’t deserve to be a millionaire, and the customer isn’t always right. The only thing anyone deserves is something they work for…and a pair of pants might be $100.
If anything, the drycleaners and taxpayers should get a refund…on the money and time this asshat has wasted.
As you are undoubtedly aware, a $54 million lawsuit was recently brought in DC District Court against a small neighborhood drycleaners over a pair of alleged lost trousers. While the Court found resoundingly in favor of the business owners, Jin and Soo Chung, their ordeal is not yet over-they have drained their saving accounts contesting this frivolous lawsuit, and they have racked up over $100,000 in legal expenses.
In order to help the Chungs defray their legal bills, ILR and the American Tort Reform Association are co-hosting a fundraiser on Tuesday evening, July 24 at 6 p.m. at the US Chamber Building in Washington, DC. Unfortunately, businesses large and small across America must deal every day with similar extortionist tactics from some plaintiffs’ lawyers. The collective outcome is not justice, but lost jobs, ruined businesses and billions of dollars in lost economic opportunity. Additional details, sponsorship opportunities and easy online registration are available at http://www.chungfundraiser.com.