Quaker Agrees To Tone Down Their Claims That Eating Oatmeal Gives You Magical Powers

If one were to believe Quaker’s marketing, one might think that by eating oatmeal you would gain the power of flight. We certainly did. That’s why for 3 years we ate nothing but Quaker Instant Oatmeal and Pez candy. Not really.

The Center for Science in the Public Interest has announced that Quaker has agreed to tone down their marketing, per their request. CSPI claims that Quaker is exaggerating the health benefits of eating oatmeal:

The Quaker Oats Company has agreed to drop certain claims on labels and in advertising that the Center for Science in the Public Interest (CSPI) says exaggerated the health benefits of eating oatmeal. Quaker will no longer describe its oatmeal as a “unique” whole grain food that “actively finds” cholesterol and removes it from the body, and will no longer display a graph that greatly exaggerated the cholesterol-lowering potential of oatmeal. In turn, CSPI will not file a lawsuit that it warned Quaker company about in October.

“Oatmeal is a healthy food, but that’s no excuse to give people the impression that it will miraculously remove cholesterol from your arteries or to otherwise exaggerate its benefits,” said CSPI litigation director Steve Gardner. “We are pleased that Quaker was receptive to our concerns and that actually filing a lawsuit became unnecessary.”

Does this mean we’re never going to be able to shoot lasers from our eyes while levitating nearby furniture? How sad. —MEGHANN MARCO

Quaker Agrees to Tone Down Exaggerated Health Claims on Oatmeal [CSPI]

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  1. pfft. Oatmeal TOTALLY gives you super-powers.

  2. Spider Jerusalem says:

    You know, I actually watched an entire HOUR show in England about the difference between porridge and oatmeal.

    I wonder if this is pointing to a new era in American history wherein there is truth in advertising?

    I mean, I don’t understand why the potato farmers of America aren’t running similar campaigns, since potatoes apparently are more than carbohydrates and starch, and its probably healthier to microwave one for breakfast than to eat three packets of strawberries-and-cream oatmeal with Jammers! or whatever that gel stuff was called.

  3. krunk4ever says:

    Haha, the flying comment reminds me of red bull and how it “gives you wings”.

    //krunk (^_^x)

  4. Maulleigh says:

    How about oatmeal cookies? Cuz those are pretty magical.

    Have you ever had one?

  5. kim says:

    Duhh…all us super-powered folk know that it’s not Quaker that makes us supercarbofunkylicious, it’s John McCann’s Steel Cut Oatmeal from Ireland.
    (Plus the cans make handy pencilholders.)

  6. MonkeyMonk says:

    Who has 30 minutes to make Oatmeal? My preferred brand of hot ceareal is Trader Joe’s Multigrain Mix. Yummy and ready in only 5-8 minutes.

  7. @MonkeyMonk: Psst: They sell QuickOats. Two minutes in the microwave.

  8. sandwich_pants says:

    I will often make a large batch or Steel Cut Oats on a saturday morning, and put it in the fridge. I end up with a large, dense cake of oats from which I can cut a wedge off, toss it in the microwave with some milk, mix in delicious flavourings, and enjoy with about 3 minutes of work in a given morning (and 30 minutes of work on saturday). The recipe I use is prettymuch Alton Brown’s oatmeal recipe from good eats (though I use less fattening ingredients whenever I can). Oh, and toasting your own oats in a buttered pan smells and tastes wonderful.

    Also, it does seem that someone gave everyone a liscense to go crazy about the heart healthy labeling if their food product has almost any soluble fiber in it. And while soluble fiber is extremely good for you and definitely worth trying to include in one’s diet, it’s nice to see the ridiculousness of some of these products (like the “heart healthy” OJs that have just a dash of soluble fiber in them) be a bit more realistic about their claims. The studies that they cite usually had a daily dose of something like 12-16 grams of soluble fiber added to people’s diets (I am pulling those numbers from the imaginary part of my memory, but they seem right), which is a lot to get unless you go for the fiber suppliments.

  9. Stepehn Colbert says:

    It made me poop.

  10. NatalieMac says:

    Yeah, everybody knows that it’s Red Bull and not oatmeal that imparts the ability of flight.

    You eat oatmeal for x-ray vision. Duh.

  11. tcabeen says:

    First I learn the hard lesson that spinach doesn’t make me immediately stronger, and then the lesson that oatmeal doesn’t make my heart impervious to King-of-Town-esque butter binges.

    What are they going to tell us next? My brand name purchases don’t actually make me cooler?
    I’m kidding, of course. That one is already an established law of the universe.

    …right?