When Shoplifting, Don't Carry An 18" Steel Machete

Not that you should shoplift, but if you do, you should realize that shoplifting while carrying an 18″ steel machete will take your charges from retail theft up to prohibited offensive weapons charges. That’s what happened to one Pennsylvania shoplifter, when he was caught with $140 dollars worth of CDs that he’d shoplifted from Target… and an 18″ steel machete that he’d shoved down the left leg of his jeans. Allen Edward Pople, 18, is now being held on $25,000 bond.

Really, Al. Did you need a machete? Was the Target in the jungle? —MEGHANN MARCO

Police Find Machete On Shoplifting Suspect [WTAE]

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  1. Scazza says:

    Hey man.. stealing CDs is some dangerous business! What if the shop keeper starts whipping them at him? I’m guessing you didn’t play Dead Rising?

  2. timmus says:

    Really, Al. Did you need a machete? Was the Target in the jungle?

    Well, when I was younger we used to joke about carrying a machete to hack down all those ignorant people who block the aisles or walk 5-abreast where you can’t get around them.

  3. Angiol says:

    all those ignorant people who block the aisles or walk 5-abreast where you can’t get around them.

    Oh, I hate those people. I call them ‘rolling roadblocks’.

  4. bluegus32 says:

    This wouldn’t be the first time:

    Did you see this story?

    Ain’t no argument that a machete can’t settle.

  5. bluegus32 says:

    This wouldn’t be the first time:

    Did you see this article?

    Ain’t no argument that a machete can’t settle.

  6. bluegus32 says:

    Sorry for the double post. I guess Consumerist hasn’t completely fixed the problems with the comment poster huh?

  7. Amry says:

    Actually, that’s not uncommon. Many of the organized shoplifting gangs arm themselves with machetes, because many of their members are, literally, straight out of the jungle.

    One such group was hitting a mall I worked in repeatedly – we were told in no uncertain terms to walk away if we saw them, because of the machete factor.

  8. Sandison says:

    One time at work we stopped a lady for shoplifting with a rusty butcher knife in her purse. Ha! Happens more often than you might think.

  9. ElPresidente408 says:

    At Target we once had someone steal close to $2500 worth of CDs and DVDs. He went to the luggage section, got the largest luggage he could find, and started filling it up. He was caught before leaving the store and they made him pay for the cost of the stolen merchandise plus whatever fees + jailtime came with the incident.

    Another interesting incident was when a man came into the store, filled a shopping cart with stolen merchandise and left. He came back in and filled up two more and left. On the fourth time he was caught by security. The security guard tried to wrestle him to the floor, but he needed help. It took 5 workers to hold the man down, yet he was still able to partially lift them all up. Finally 3 police officers arrived and got him under control.