Don’t Eat The Marshmallows Shot By The Marshmallow Shooter

Adding to this marshmallow shooter’s retardation as a product, it contains contradictory instructions. The package boasts, “Edible Ammo!” but the warning label says, “Do not eat marshmallows after shooting.” This angers us. We’re going to YouTube ourselves smashing mallows. We’ll run that evil The Marshmallow Fun Company out of business. Just kidding, but seriously, this is dumb.— BEN POPKEN

Fun With Warning labels – ‘Marshmallow Shooter’ [Bon jour, Pee Wee]

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  1. Hoss says:

    Adding to this marshmellow shooter’s retardation… is the fact that we can’t spell marshmallow!

  2. Triteon says:

    Questions I would ask before buying this product:

    What foods may I eat after shooting it from the gun?
    Do Milk Duds count as food?
    Is there a bazooka-size gun? If so, may I eat Bazooka gum from it?
    When will the Campbell’s Soup-on-the-Run rocket-propelled grenade attachment be available?
    Why have I never thought of filling my Oozinator with Fluff until now?

    I would also recommend not eating this straight from the barrel.

  3. adamondi says:

    Who would really want to eat a marshmallow shot across the room and rolling around on the dirty floor until picked up with grimy fingers? Maybe this label should be expanded to say:

    “Don’t eat anything you pick up off the floor, genius.”

  4. fishfucerk says:

    holy crap that seasonshot is the most awesome thing I have ever heard of.

  5. Clearly this is to avoid liability when your six year old shoots it into the cat litter box.

  6. This review cracked me up. From Amazon.com:

    ‘I bought a Marshmallow Shooter and Blaster because my little brother had one and I thought it would be great for the dorm. I was not let down! Now half my friends have one or the other and we have little wars in the dorm hall.

    I’ll admit I couldn’t get the shooter to work at first, but I called the manufacturer and they were extremely helpful and helped me realize I was loading it wrong. They also told me if I ever had any problems to call them again and they would help or replace the items if they ever broke.

    Thank you Marshmallow Fun Company!!’

  7. DutchFlat says:

    What happens if you eat a marshmallow shot from a marshmallow shooter? Do you die? If so, I need to know about it right away cuz I got one of these for Christmas last year, and like the two fruitcakes I got, I sort of repackaged it and passed it along. To my friend’s kids.

    Now my friend’s kids have it, and I’m a bit concerned. What if one of them (or more) gets killed? Well, I gues it would depend on which kid. It’s be more serious for some than others. It kind of reminds me of when George’s fiance (in Seinfeld) died from licking poisened wedding invitation envelopes.

    As far as eating the marshmallows that have hit the floor, the standard three-second rule applies: As long as the marshamallow has not been on the floor for more than three-seconds, it’s okay to eat. Yes, that is from the Bible.

  8. RogueSophist says:

    Liability. It’s likely the instruction is designed to prevent people from shooting the fluffy, sugary ammo directly into their mouths. This would obviously present a significant choking hazard.