Elmo, Thankfully, Goes Missing


Walmart has declared missing a shipment of 100 Elmo T.M.X. dolls. The annoying-as-fuck toys went missing en route to a Walmart location in Bentonville, AR.

“”We’re continuing the search for them,” she said. Wal-Mart is also offering a trip to a comedy club in New York City as a reward for returning the shipment.”

Comedy club? For hijacking a truck? Hmmm, it’s tempting to suspect foulplay, but we smell PR stunt. Is it illegal to steal your own shipment of Elmos and sell them on Ebay? Only if you report it as a crime…

From CNN:

“However, officials at the Bentonville police department told CNNMoney.com that they were not currently aware of any missing Elmo report from Wal-Mart.”

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  1. Mike_ says:

    Clearly a publicity stunt. Stop feeding the Elmo-mania, people. It’s just a stupid toy.

  2. Ass_Cobra says:

    A trip to an NYC comedy club? For reals? Wal-Mart is really value oriented. You can’t walk 8 steps in Times Square without being offered free admission to some sucky comedy club.

  3. AcilletaM says:

    Hmmm, seems somebody from Wal-Mart is taking a page from the book Jennifer Government.

  4. aimseeee says:

    That’s it. I officially can’t sleep knowing those giggling bastards are unaccounted for. THEY CAN SMELL FEAR.

  5. spin_sycle says:

    Why does this remind me of the warehouse-full-of-Barbies-that-burned-so-they-could-charge-more-$$$ of 10 years ago? I think they were those damm Christmas Barbies….

  6. RandomHookup says:

    AK is Alaska…AR is for Arkansas.

  7. Ass_Cobra says:

    So Elmo is heading toward the north pole; that crafy bastard.

  8. JT says:

    Don’t worry everyone, I’m sure they have Bert and Ernie chasing them down.