UPDATE: Vegemite Not Banned

Reader David informs us that Vegemite, a salty, paste-like spread, and an Australian national delicacy, was never banned. It was all a hoax. We are upset; there’s nothing we enjoy more than irritated Aussies. We are further upset because we would have known it was a hoax if we had been reading the comments more closely.

“There is no ban on Vegemite,” said FDA spokesman Mike Herndon, who said he was surprised by the media reports on a possible ban.

Newstarget added, “Many news outlets are now classifying the weekend reports of a Vegemite ban as a hoax or an urban legend that began with an overenthusiastic border official possibly confiscating a jar of the spread.”

Mmmm… Yeastlicious! Feel free to dig in.

Previously (and wrong): U.S. Government Sparks Australian Riot, Bans Vegemite

Comments

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  1. acambras says:

    I just KNEW there was something weird about all that.

  2. LRM216 says:

    Have you ever tasted it? I have friends from England who eat it all the time. Gawd, it tastes just like the crap that comes out of your car during an oil change. It should be banned!

  3. GenXCub says:

    It tastes like the coating on vitamins and smells like old people.

  4. AcilletaM says:

    Soon they’ll be breeding us like cattle! You’ve got to warn everyone and tell them! Vegemite is made of people! You’ve got to tell them! Vegemite is people!

  5. DeadSnake says:

    Well, after hearing the good news I took the time to celebrate by having a slice of toast with the nondescript stuff. Then I proceeded to vomit everywhere. Everywhere.

  6. madderhatter says:

    Mmmm … soylent green. Man, that crap is nasty looking. Blech.

  7. Pelagius says:

    Philistines. Vegemite is made from the leftovers from brewing beer. Like antivenin is made from venom, vegemite is the antidote to a searing VB-induced hangover.

    As for your peanut butter. Huh. You call that a breakfast spread? THIS is a breakfast spread, mate.

  8. Pelagius says:

    Italics everywhere.

    EVERYWHERE.

  9. Closing tag

  10. Fixed

  11. Ah! Now?

  12. guess not

  13. Anonymously says:

    That seems like an awful lot of Vegemite on that toast. I picked up a few single-serving packs at McDonald’s when I was down-under. I’ve been keeping them for a special occasion.

  14. Jeff says:

    @Greg P: What kind of special occasion are you planning with Vegemite? That sounds weird. Vegemite is for everyday loving, anyway. You can get it at most grocery stores, you know.

    P.S. Vegemite is good, but it’s no Bovril.

  15. Anonymously says:

    Shush, you.

  16. Grrrrrrr, now with two buns made of bacon. says:

    Um…yay?…I guess?…Gawd, it just doesn’t look very appetizing.

    At least the Aussies among us will be relieved.

  17. meandertail says:

    Oh darn. I was hoping the ‘ban’ would have spread into Marmite too. That stuff is nasty.

  18. simmo says:

    Note to self: check up on Aussie based news from America. (lol, original source is from Queensland…go figure)
    @Greg P: Also, that amount isn’t lots. I have been known to put more on. Just remember to NEVER eat it from a spoon :S.
    I for one think its weird that a thing such as pb&j (peanut butter and jam) exists.

  19. Yozzie says:

    I would also add that peanut butter-filled chocolate, microwaveable sausage wrapped in pancake batter on a stick, the McGriddle and Dr Pepper don’t tend to translate well outside the States. My siblings and I grew up with Reese’s and Dr Pepper and sweet tea in the fridge, right alongside the meat pies and Vegemite (and Kraft Vegemite cheese singles, which suck), and all our friends thought we were crazy for liking that Yank shit.

    Those of you mortified by Vegemite might like to try a pie floater, or steak and kidney pie. Then you’ll know the true meaning of gross.

  20. meandertail says:

    Uh, whats a pie floater? Or do I even want to know?

  21. Yozzie says:

    ^^ You don’t, but I’ll share the love anyway – it’s a meat pie (good) “floating” in a plate of thick pea soup (gross) and usually liberally squirted with tomato sauce (ketchup). Fun fact: it looks exactly the same both before and after you eat it.

  22. LRM216 says:

    Oh my Gawd, the Pie Floater has finished me off for the day. Do folks really eat that????

  23. acambras says:

    If I were to go on a Pie Floater and Vegemite diet, I’m sure the pounds would melt away. Because I don’t think I’d have much of an appetite.

  24. TransmissionDump says:

    Oh YUM! I love vegemite.

    Here’s one for you to try

    Toast with butter, spread vegemite on in your desired thickness (I’m a hard core user and like it thick as axle grease) Then slice some cheese, lay it over your vegemite and pop it under the grill until melted.

    It’s excellent for hangovers due to it’s Vitamin B content. It also adds flavour to stews / gravies.. but only in small amounts or you end up with Vegemite soup or vegemeite gravy.