Chicago Alderman Regally Summons Fast Food CEOs to Explain Trans Fat

In a city seething with corrupt officials, rife with crime and poverty, what’s public enemy number one to the city alderman? Why, the gelatinous blob of trans fat stalking through the city streets, engorging itself upon hapless citizens.

At least according to Edward Burke, Chicago’s alderman, who has called for the CEOs of all major fast food chains to appear before the City Council and explain themselves.

CEOs called to the table include Jim Skinner of McDonald’s, John W. Chidsey of Burger King Corp. and David C. Novak of Yum Brands Inc., the parent company of Pizza Hut, Taco Bell and Kentucky Fried Chicken. Many of them are having a hard time trying to figure out how to pencil in an appointment with a lunatic, bandwagon-hopping public official in between more pressing hooker engagements.

The irony is that Burke really does have an uncanny resemblance to Colonel Sanders. It’s like a Hitler look alike going after Neo-Nazism.

Alderman calls out CEOs over trans fat

Image credit: Julie Coe.

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  1. Mary Marsala with Fries says:

    What’s funny, in a public-decapitation kinda way, is that it’s considered “out there” in our society to round up corporations and demand that they explain why they’re still doing something that’s been proven to be harmful to people. Guess this guy didn’t get enough Corporate Sensitivity training when he took office! -M.

  2. Paul D says:

    WTF is an alderman?

    Is that like Burning Man, but with CEOs instead of hippies?

  3. gte910h says:

    A public offical embarassing companies for using artificial products
    that are harmful to humans who eat them? Man, what a bastard!

    It’s god-aweful that a public official goes after something likely to
    kill 20% of the population rather than that horrible street crime which
    will at max kill 3-4%!

    –Michael

    –Michael

  4. Hooray4Zoidberg says:

    There is a big difference Michael, people can choose to not be a victim of fast food. Victims of street crime often have no say in the matter.

    Besides this won’t change a thing and is really just a big waste of time. The fast food industry has never ever claimed to be good for you and in moderation it’s really not all that bad. The problem is people who eat it 4 times a week, and really it’s nobody else’s responsibility but theirs to change that.

    There are better things for the mayor to concern himself with. Leave this battle to the salad industries marketing teams.

  5. An alderman is a throwback to local governors and sheriffs of those golden feudal era days in the middle ages. Completely immune to criticism, completely useless, and completely corrupt. Welcome to Chicago…

  6. Ishmael says:

    The alderman wants to ban partially hydrogenated oils from fast-food resteraunts in Chicago. This is the same guy who got fois-gras banned. Yeah, it stinks that these companies use these fat-laden oils, but there’s a reason. They’re cheap, they don’t go bad, and they keep their flavor. Imagine how much your french fries would cost or how funny it would taste if Burger King switched to another type of oil. You don’t see anyone trying to ban butter or olive oil, do you? Using those types of products would not help the ‘obesity problem’ any more. They’re still calorie- and fat-laden, they just don’t have the trans fat that partially hydrogenated oils do.

    Not to mention that this ban would totally invalidate the whole concept of Personal Responsibility. It’s a choice to eat at these places, and its a choice that no one is making you take. Really, this alderman guy is just trying to get some pubilicity.

  7. greghard says:

    Actually, Ishmael, olive oil is a good fat.

    Nonetheless, somebody should be going after these bastards for… wait, what are they doing?