Listening to Metallica while listening to his iPod, Jason Bunch was struck by lightning. The bolt of Zeus’ fire then conducted up the iPod earbuds and caused his sideburns to catch fire. His melted sneakers were found twenty feet away by concerned neighbors.
Jason and his mother believe that the iPod is some sort of magical lightning capturing device, drawing jagged streaks of electrical energy down from the heavens.
Unfortunately, that’s not actually the way science works, but personally, we prefer to believe that the iPod is a sort of Beebelbroxian infinite implausibility generator, capable of spontaneously generating implausible cataclysms depending on the track playing. Jason was struck by lightning while listening to ‘Ride the Lightning’… if he’d been listening to ‘For Whom the Bell Tolls’, perhaps a wormhole would have opened above his head and dropped the Liberty Bell on him.