An Evening Phone Call with British Telecom

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When you get an unwanted phone call from a telemarketer, we don't really recommend letting one exasperated hand slowly run down your insanely jactitating visage right before your knuckles all pop and you tear your own face clear off. Nor do we recommend threatening to pull the telemarketer inside out by his rectum. That is not responsible consumerism.

When you get an unwanted phone call from a telemarketer, we don’t really recommend letting one exasperated hand slowly run down your insanely jactitating visage right before your knuckles all pop and you tear your own face clear off. Nor do we recommend threatening to pull the telemarketer inside out by his rectum. That is not responsible consumerism.

On the other hand, it’s — at the very least — pretty damn funny. So if you must make a bad call with a CSR or telemarketer the opening buffet in an orgy of crippling physical violence, at least have the decency to give us the exclusive.

We rarely do this here at the Consumerist, but we’d like to personally tip our hats to this video’s most unflappable of telemarketers, who insists his telesurvey will only take a few seconds even after an insane British man has threatened to bugger him clean to death whilst simultaneously strangling him with his own entrails. Now there’s a lad who is good at his job.

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