The Oozinator Delights Children

Hasbro Marketing Executive, a glowing light bulb bouncing merrily above his skull: “I’ve got it! First, we’ll design our new Supersoaker water gun with the shape and hue of a grotesque alien phallus. Then, instead of water, we’ll make it squirt ropes of thick, opalescent ooze! Finally, we’ll market it with a television spot in which a pan-ethnic rainbow of small children are the gleeful recipients to load after hot, sticky load shot all over their chests and faces! It’s a win!”

Even the Oozinator sounds like someone’s pet name for their masculinity… post venereal disease. Thanks, Joel!

UPDATE: There were some damn funny Amazon review pages of the product that have since been deleted. have been deleted. We’ve got a few archived here.

Comments

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  1. homerjay says:

    The Oozinator: Preparing young boys for a career in gay porn…. Since 2006.

  2. WMeredith says:

    Wow, it doesn’t get much better then this when it come to marketing glitches. That’s awesomely terrible.

  3. Paul D says:

    Almost as great as the Harry Potter battery-powered vibrating broom that you put between your legs…

  4. Am I the only one who wishes that this commercial has a money shot or two? Honestly, oozing all over a beshirted chest is one thing, but why not the face?

  5. rikomatic says:

    It’s a sad day when a children’s ad is NSFW.

  6. fizzer fits says:

    The great patrons of Amazon have shared their expiriences with this wonderful toy:

    http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/customer-reviews/B000BXJ0

    -GB

  7. matto says:

    I’ll have to mention the erection that this ad gave me the next time I visit my therapist.

    Isn’t the FBI on some sort of Internet Crusade to banish filth like this?

  8. alec says:

    Haha, that ad is too much. All of the reactions seem to mirror those of my ex-girlfriends to my potent brand of ‘ooze’, is there some sort of anti-Ooze campaign going on?

  9. Model12345 says:

    Oh. My. God. I haven’t had a good laugh like this in a LONG time! Who would have thunk it that something so clean could be so “Dirrrty”?

  10. Chet Lemon says:

    Shit all over your face …. KID!