Contest: Make up a Word, Win Big Like Halliburton

In normal life, a neologism is making up a new word. In publication land, a neologism is when readers and editors jerk off together and preface statements with, “To coin a phrase…” Get it? “Gism.”

Anywhoodles, we, and another Gawker blog, Valleywag, are running just such a “ookie dictionary” tourney. So far, Nick Douglas and his readers smithed in the flames of creativity (see photo, left), “Gizmautism: The half-aware state of one jacked into an iPod, smartphone, or laptop” and “WiFired: Getting thrown out of an internet caf

for spending 4 hours ‘working on your startup’ after buying one small mocha.”

The Valleywag winners are getting free music n’ crap, but we have journalistic integrity to maintain. So our winner will get a Science Award certificate, just like Halliburton’s!

We know our readers are you are smart and witty. You can do better than these pocket protectorates. Here’s two to get us started.

    Shopenfreude: Taking delight in other’s misery as they overpay for goods and services.

    Costration Anxiety: The fear by males that shopping with a female will result in their man wand being handed to them on a plastic platter.

Submit yours in the comments or send an email to tips@consumerist.com, subject line, “neologism.” Best will get voted on , then advance to super mega Gawker on Gawker blog action, or “Glogcksterfuck.”

Comments

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  1. Smoking Pope says:

    Hallopropism – The invention of a word to convey an idea when a different word was invented 200 years ago to suit the same purpose. See neologism/sniglet.

  2. I just came up with:

    Jihadvertising – The marketing industry’s continuing crusade to insert more ads into every good and service we partake in.

  3. Nick Douglas says:

    I’m going to call everything “my man wand” from now on.

  4. Smoking Pope says:

    Justin McElroy’s comment brought to you by McDonald’s. McDonald’s, I’m Loving It!

  5. mrscolex says:

    I like Jihadvertising, I think thats pretty good… Can you imagine a bunch of guys in a Sony board room shaking their fists in the air as if they had just heard that Iran had developed uranium enrichment capabilities? I could..

    Heres my contribution:

    Blogundig – This is a play on the Dutch word, Talkundig, which in Dutch refers to linguistics. Specifically Blogundig relates to the language that bloggers use when they invent ridiculous words and phrases that simply have caught on due to the viral nature of the internet itself, but not due to any particular merit in verbal usage.

    The phrases are caustic examples of words that would have never been invented through the natural corruption of linguistics, but simply through the cynical and lazy nature of the bloggers themselves. Internet buzzwords like “blogosphere” and phrases like “after the jump” for example, aren’t particularly compelling to use in real life activities but seem uncannily appropriate on the internet given people’s self-masturbatory sense of importance when creating new phrases online.

    Words and phrases to watch out for:

    * Blogosphere
    * Bloggers
    * After the jump

    This is contradictory in nature to other words that have been invented on the internet that make sense in linguistic usage, for example: Podcast. Furthermore, blogundig bears no relation to general Internet Slang since they’re derived from two different sources (laziness and cliche versus an overachieving sense of self-importance)

    And of course, blongundig qualifies itself as blogundig, making it funny.

  6. deenster says:

    blogasm – the action of reading one or more blog post(s) followed by a series of involuntary muscle contractions accompanied by a sudden release of endorphins providing a feeling of euphoria

  7. PalmBayChuck says:

    Disinfactent – What results when many different parties tried to convince you of something with talking points, hyperbole and nonsense to the point where you can’t make heads or tales of an issue anymore.

    [www.dictionary-for-science.com]