Morning News Roundup

  • 7-Eleven is set to implement a new, testosterone-boosted ATM this year, providing even more banking solutions to the great unwashed

  • The all-embracing milk of corporate hegemony continues to disintegrate the Cinnamon Toast Crunch of the public domain, Showtime bought the Smithsonian’s film archive, giving the commercial channel ‘first refusal’ rights over anyone trying to use the archive for documentaries and the like. [via]
  • The New York Times reports on the Chevy/Apprentice user-created ad site and its slew of anti-SUV ads. The site went live last Fridayish and the story was filed today. Not a bad turnaround; on the heels of a site redesign, is the old gray lady trying to hem its skirts up a little bit and show some, gasp, ankle?
  • Ejaculating energy prices have Exxon beating out Wal-Mart for the Fortune 500 #1 slot, as determined by revenue
  • Speaking of, Brokeback Mountain DVDs started selling today at Wal-Mart and everywhere else, amidst predictable conservative backlash (sounds kinky, no?) Let’s see how long it takes the house of Sam Walton to pull it. Sidebar: where is our Brokeback Molehill parody?
  • A new study shows that black-oriented TV has substantially more fast-food ads than more general programming. Sounds like someone didn’t realize Bamboozled was a satire.

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  1. QuasiInformed says:

    I feel like I just got my morning news roundup from the tweaker who hangs out at the 7-Eleven up the street. May be paragraph breaks would help, but I am not sure.

  2. QuasiInformed says:

    Ahh, much better to make sense. “Ejaculating energy prices” is now just a disturbing, but compelling, image, not blathering lunacy.