Witness a Sprint Rep on the Verge of Cracking

Paul H writes (our intro for us):

Having some persistent problems with a PCS modem, I sent an email to Sprint customer service via the form on their website. I didn’t expect that the people answering the general questions would be able to help me, but I wasn’t in the mood for discussing my problems with someone in India, nor could I find any real technical support on Sprint’s website.

The response I received back from a Sprint customer service rep was surreal. It starts out normal, and contradictory, enough (“I will be happy to assist you…” followed by a lengthy description of why he can’t). From there, it spirals into a tone of empathetic madness and self-doubt (“I do not know how you would accept this fact. I want to work for you. Really”). I appreciate the concern, but it is a small electronic device that is not working; you didn’t run over my dog or knock up my daughter. The full email follows:

After the jump, of course.

Then, the crazy, near-to-breakdown customer service tech writes:

Dear Paul,

Thank you for contacting Sprint together with Nextel. I will be happy to assist you regarding problem with the connection card.

I sincerely apologize for the inconvenience you are experiencing due to this issue.

I can understand that it is always upsetting when such service does not work up to its expectations. It seems that due to a possible service related issue you are facing this problem.

Your concern requires technical assistance and we at eCare are not equipped with the required technical infrastructure. So an interaction with our technical specialist is required to effectively resolve your concern. We have a separate group of technical specialists, who work on resolving technical issues.

I really do not want to divert you to another support group, but this requires a live chat, which is not possible through an email interaction. Therefore, I request you to contact our technical specialist by dialing 1-888-788-4727. Our technical support team will be happy to advise you on how to resolve this issue.

I do not know how you would accept this fact. I want to work for you. Really, I wish that I should correct this problem for once and ever. But the problem is I cannot do though I wish to do so. Reason is very unconvincing but honest. Be assured that your issue will be resolved at the earliest.

I truly appreciate the patience restrained by you till we resolve the issue. We value you as a great customer. Warm Regards!

Thank you for contacting Sprint together with Nextel.

Bobby
Business E-Care
Sprint together with Nextel “Where our customers come first!”

Comments

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  1. kickslop says:

    Eh, cut the guy some slack.

  2. beelerspace says:

    I am being totally stereotypical here, but I bet this is an outsourced email. Any conversations I’ve had with Indian customer service reps never really fix the problem, but they are always so polite, and apologetic that they cannot fix my problem.

    Fun article on outsourcing.

  3. billpendry says:

    Seems like a generic template to which the rep added the last few paragraphs of engrish. So much for not “discussing my problems with someone in India.”

  4. D says:

    “Thank you for contacting xxx. I will be happy to assist you regarding problem with xxx.

    I sincerely apologize for the inconvenience you are experiencing due to this issue.

    I can understand that it is always upsetting when such service does not work up to its expectations.”

    This standard greeting infuriates me. It is the ultimate in disingenuous condescension. When I get this greeting via phone or email, I automatically, uncontrollably shift into angry customer mode.

  5. RowdyRoddyPiper says:

    On the outsourcing front:

    I wonder how the problems faced by the typical American consumer are viewed by the outsourced CSRs. India is still a third world country. I’m waiting to hear about the call where the CSR loses the veneer of politeness and lets an American consumer have what for.

    “Sir, you are not understanding me. This is a trivial problem. I for instance have had a dead body at the end of my street for three full days. Also I have not heard from my parents in over a week, yes they are missing after a mudslide in my home town.”

    I really wonder if breakrooms in India are filled with CSRs talking about spoiled American consumers. Or maybe they’re thinking if not being able to get an EVDO connection absolutely everwhere is considered a huge problem, what the heck are they still doing in India.

  6. Rick Dobbs says:

    Damn, I wish I could find the article. There was a good one about how CSR’s in India are growing to hate Americans because when we call Customer Service we are arrogant, rude for little reason, and demanding of even the smallest problems. I think it was Wired.

    This is one of my beefs with Sprint though. In every recording they encourage you to go to their website. I’ve logged multiple issues with them via e-mail. They’re always nice, but the end result is always a phone call and it’s associated hold times.

  7. adamondi says:

    I really wonder if breakrooms in India are filled with CSRs talking about spoiled American consumers.

    From what I have seen and heard about India, I doubt there are breakrooms like we know them. The people there have to work pretty hard for what Americans would scoff at. I try to keep this in mind when dealing with an outsourced call center, but that usually only lasts a little while. Then the rage begins.

  8. RaginCajun says:

    Well, it’s obviously outsourced to India. While the grammar may be wrong, all the words are spelled correctly. Had that been an American customer service rep winging it in an email, the English would have been much much worse.

  9. djwoodyphl says:

    I’m not sure what is worse – calling Sprint customer service and having to deal with their maddeningly annoying voice prompt system, Claire (see also HAL 9000) or receiving this email.

    In either case I offer sympathy to its recipient.

  10. L_Emmerdeur says:

    I wish they would just outsource the customer side of the equation to India, so we wouldn’t have to call their sorry asses about our broke-ass equipment anymore. They design it, they make it, they buy it, they get a frakking heart attack at 50 over the stress of owning shite that doesn’t work.