The Zero Movement: Coke’s Pepsi Blue

We’d reach down deep within our mucous-engorged rage cavity to slop some bile at the Coca-Cola Company for their stupendously midguided attempt to promote new ‘Coke Zero’ through The Zero Movement, but we’re still careening around our porcelain work tub like so much congealed ham from manifest force of psychic disconnect upon the realization that there was a company out there still attempting to appear cool by using a blog.

We won’t get into all the dirty details—Adrants and The Zero Movement Sucks have more than amply documented that the Coke-less site is, in fact, a Coke marketing campaign—but we wanted to point out the layer cake of lame constructed by the world’s largest soda pop company. It’s a blog with a slacker manifesto using Javascript session IDs! It really is from the ’90s!. We are not joking in the least when we say that we’re getting a little bit ill to our stomach, and we even enjoy Coke as a product.

Nice color scheme, though.

Comments

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  1. meaniemean says:

    Finally, a multinational soft drink company understands me. Their besuited marketing executives have such amazing insight into my angst.

    I think I’m going to throw up.

  2. SamC says:

    feeling sick, eh? that’ll teach you to drink Coke Zero. ;)

    Though, I will admit that the site looks pretty slick. Too bad it’s wasted on a nasty tasting soda.

    I wish the soda companies would spend more money on making a drinkable soda than on stupid gimmicks that fool nobody.

  3. beth dean says:

    The ad campaign is kind of dumb, but the soda is my favorite. I think it’s pretty good.

  4. Tonya says:

    I really, really like Coke Zero so I’m going to close my eyes (see no evil), plug my ears, and pretend I never saw this post.

  5. Rick says:

    I, for one, am massively relieved at all the Zero calorie drinks coming out. Frankly, the one calorie drinks that preceded them made me feel like I was just ballooning up.

  6. You would have thought that a rich multinational company like Coke could at least afford an anonymous proxy for their whois data. I mean seriously how stupid do they think the blogophere is? Sooner or later they knew it had to come out. I hope that the PR Exec who came up with bonehead idea ends up getting fired.